Ryan
Hi, this is my first post. I'm 16, male, I live in England. Today my friend Claire (14) came to visit, she's really nice. We were watching a movie alone together, and eating lots of food, candy and stuff. After awhile she said that she needed the toilet, so I stopped the video for her, and when she was inside I went to the door to listen. I could hear her taking down her pants and panties and sitting on the toilet. I heard her shuffle her feet a little, and then begin to tinkle. This lasted for about thirteen seconds, and then the stream stopped. She sniffed, and then there was silence... I hear her shifting a little as the poo must have been starting to emerge from her bumhole, and she gave a quiet, soft grunt, shortly followed by a small plop. A soft fart then followed, making a bubblign sound at the end. Two more delicate grunts, and then a bigger plop sound, and a small sigh. She shuffled her feet a little more and cleared her throat, grunting softly (almost inaudibly...ve!
ry cute) as a few more small turds escaped her. Then nothing happened for almost a minute before a final plopping sound - this one must have been hanging from her hole as she waited for it to drop. I then heard her breathing, and remembered the toilet paper situation. I heard her softly say "oh no......no paper...", and a small frustrated sigh as she stood up. I could hear her pulling her panties up, slowly - she must have been rather tentative - and then her pants. As she washed her hands I went back and sat down, to wait for her. She came out, and smiled at me, and I pressed play on the VCR to continue watching the movie. She sat down (gently), and I put my arm around her (we're close) and asked if she was okay. She said "I'm okay, but I'm feeling a little sticky, there wasn't any paper...". Suddenly I remembered I had some kleenex in my room and told her that she could use it if she wanted to, but she said "I think it's a little late", and giggled. So we just snuggled up to!
gether and watched the rest of the movie. When her mum came to collect us (I was going to Claire's house for the night) she slowly got up, a little embarrassed. I reassured her that she was okay, she was scared that people might be able to smell her poop as she was unwiped, but the smell was contained in her pants and panties. She was obviously very relieved when we arrived back at her house, and we hugged once in her room. She quickly moved to her underwear drawer and got some clean panties, I helped her balance while she quickly removed her shoes and pants. She looked cute in just her white t-shirt and white panties, she knew that I thought so too, but we didn't say anything, cause we're still officially "just friends"...hehe. I offered to leave the room at that point, but she said don't be silly, and gently pulled down her panties, stepping out of them on the floor. She pulled the clean pair up to her knees, temporarily slipped a pantiliner into the panties to shield them f!
rom her still sticky bumhole, and finished getting dressed. When she then went to the bathroom to wipe, I looked at her dirty panties. They were soft and white, stained in the crotch area with her normal discharge as well as a little pee, and the skidmarks. There were two quite solid marks, fairly light brown, one of them with a tiny bit of actual poop matter that must have stayed on her bumhole as she pinched off the last turd. I picked them up to fold them and put them in the laundry, and they smelled quite sweet! I walked into the bathroom to see Claire sitting on the toilet. I quickly turned around but she said "don't worry, after today I don't think there's anything left to be embarrassed about!" She was pulling paper of the roll to wipe with, folding it once and reaching between her legs to wipe - she grunted softly the first time she wiped, and then smiled. She didn't check the paper the first few times that she wiped, but after that she inspected it, and wiped a furthe!
r three times, making some comment about being rather messy. When finished, she checked her pantiliner, which was a barely marked at all - just a faint brown tint. She decided to leave it there, smiling at me and saying "just in case..."
Anyway, that's my story, sorry it's so looong, but I was just surprised that it happened! I have been reading the posts here, and I hoep that people will reply with lots of other skidmark stories...they're kinda my thing, hehe. The way things are going with Claire, I'll probably have some more to share soon, too :c) Bye for now,
Ryan. xx
Sandra
Yesterday I had a long meeting with 3 of my colleagues (one man and two other women). After an hour I felt bloated and considered going to the ladies room for a poo. But it felt like gas so I dicreetly lifted up one cheek and let aout a silent, gassy fart. I couldn't smell it, which was good! A few minutes later I farted again, only this one was audible! I'm known in the office as someone who farts a lot so I wasn't embarrassed. In fact, nobody even looked surprised! So while I was talking, I let out some more farts, some of which were loud and juicy! Whenever I fart in front of people I always say "excuse me." After soem more farts, the air started to get a little "funky" so I thought it was time to go for a poo which I could feel coming out of my bottom and I wasn't wearing panties. I excused myself to my coworkers, went to the ladies room and did a huge fart followed by a massive poo which took 10 minutes to come out. I returned to the meeting and the air didn't seem so far!
ty. My colleagues never said a word - I don't think they mind me farting in front of them. My husband hates it when I fart in front of him. He says it's not ladylike and that they stink!
PV
Hi Louise!
At last I'd like to take the chance to write a proper reply to yours and Steve's posts of the last few weeks -- I've been super busy and only able to 'touch down' on the board long enough to see what's happening, and to quickly post the enema advice for Nancy -- speaking of which, I am so happy my advice was both useful and accurate! She managed to correct her problem in no time, and I think there's a valuable lesson in that for the strainers out there. We've read many posts from folks for whom moving their bowels is a painful and exhausting process, but as Nancy has ably demonstrated, there are safe alternatives to chemical laxatives and frustration.
Your advice to Dee on pussy angle for peeing erect was right on the mark! I've read that some women trying it for the first time raise their pussies so far that they not only clear the rim of the loo, they hit the wall above it! This sounds extreme, but I'm in no doubt that it's possible, the range of!
human variation is profound.
On that crazy Olympics we mulled over, I get recurring flashes of what the lineup would look like! Me, you, your Mom maybe, Steve's Pakistani diva and the Indian lady from your work, and no doubt lots of others! All uniformed in running shoes, hair scrunchies, halter tops and suntans. YES! Like I said, crazy! We'd all have sixty minutes to accumulate fluid, then another sixty minutes in which to hold -- no more fluid. We would each get three shots in each competition event (each event thus taking a day's competition), a best of three on weighted points average, then total the gross pointscore for the final placings. The standing event would be our favorite, of course, marked on neatness, cohesiveness of stream, distance reached and timed expulsion. And so forth... Yes, the super-sprayers would make the thrust-to-wieght record (!) but they wouldn't stand a chance in the neatness stakes, or the duration event.
I'm sure a how-to-sta!
nd class would be a hit. Liberation from the closets! Stand up and be counted! Stand and deliver! I'm getting a bit silly, dear...
You asked about Sophie Rickets. I've no idea if that's her real name, it sounds like a skit on her painfully thin legs, frankly! She was the first female wee diva I ever heard of, she gained fame several years ago by peeing on the great monuments of London for the camera. There's a famous photo of her standing with her short skirt lifted, peeing an absolutely horizontal stream into a wall fountain somewhere in London after dark. It's not that it's an erotic image at all, it isn't, it's the casual, couldn't-care-less way she's doing it that makes it so special. I guess she was a trend-setter in female standing peeing, and her distance I think was upposed to be impressive.
I really enjoyed Steve's retelling of the triple-washing of the urinal at the pool! He can sure tell a good yarn, as they say in Aus! I hope one day he'll lose hi!
s self-consciousness and stand with three pretty special ladies to share a rare and special event! I mean, three shapely blonde ladies who are delighted to have fun passing water, and tease a guy with it, that's a (please Mr Moderator, I'm not dwelling on this aspect!!!) wet-dream for around three billion members of the human race! But I understand and appreciate his conservatism -- he's a gentleman and needs to come gently to an understand that sharing the fun is absolutely okay!
Regarding the hissing sounds we make, that's when an 'aerosol' effect occurs, tiny air bubbles mix with your wee stream and it's the air that makes the sound. I find I hiss or not, or at different intensities, at various times, with how much force I use, and I seem to remember hissing more when I was young. For the record, I usually wee first, but if I'm fairly desperate I'll quite naturally release my bowels simultaneously. It feels amazing to be emitting from both orifices at once!
"Steve first witnessed me having a wee, he told me he thought it was 'captivating' and enhanced my femininity, which I thought was very nice of him to say. I think because of how you do big eruptions he would find like me you are his fave type in weeing styles. "
Thank you kindly! I do try, but I find that when I go for sheer volume, although the relief is almost indescribable when I finally release my water, the emission isn't very spectacular, just a looooong, regular stream.
That's an interesting theory about why men/males have to wee *on* something rather then just let rip in any direction... I guess it's environmental. I mean, I doubt the inhabitants of treeless grasslands have the option! Yes, I hope that boy you saw knows it's okay, and that he provided pleasure to you with the act. That boy with the extremely small penis has a condition called 'micropenile' and it is sometimes surgically treated, or treated with hormones I guess, but there are time!
s it can be such a staggering mental blow to the male psyche to have essentially 'no tool in his kit,' that a sex-change might even be preferable!
Yes, Louise, I was very interested to read your description of your first ever beach wee. I know what you mean about being so excited your heart is thudding. The first few times I used a urinal my heart was banging so fiercely I could feel my breasts moving against my dress! It made it all the harder to relax and let the water go. And the first time I did it with an audience was the same, and the second!
When I went at the nude beach it was nowhere near as open. If there had been lots of other folks doing it as they were at your beach, I would probably have done my best to just wee openly in front of them, but there were none, so I did it covertly. When I did my last one, I was standing in a gully above the beach and seemed to pee a waterfall, facing away from the beach but still in sight of folks who cared to look!
. Heck, I so envy your and Steve's experience with that amazingly uninhibited family!
Louise, on a parallel topic, I remember Steve once telling us that you had a very difficult bowel opening at the beach once. I'd love to know in your own words how you handled that. Was Steve the only one around, or did you have to field the approbation of others while you were in difficulty? That would have been terribly embarrassing, and I hope you were not troubled by others in the process.
With best wishes, dear -- keep washing those walls!
PV
PV
SLAYER MOON: With regards to your interest in female standing pee technique, I'm delighted to offer you my observations and experiences.
You ask: "What sort of stance (horse stance, bent forward, etc.) do you assume? Did you have to modify your clothingto make it possible? Do you hold your vulva open withyour fingers? Do you wipe, or do you think it's superfluous to wipe?"
One at a time:
My normal stance is standing upright, facing the urinal, wall, tree, whatever, leaning back a little from the hips. My feet are about shoulder-width, though I sometimes feel the urge to open my thighs wider, outward at the knees. Some women can urinate with their legs closer together. It's also amply possible to urinate bending over, so the stream goes backward, so you face away from your 'target' as it were, though I've not pursued this stance.
Initially I practiced nude in the shower and the first time I ever did it outdoors I wore only a minidress, no pan!
ties, and urinated on my back fence. It got plenty of dousings last year! Soon I was confident to wear panties under a short dress, and simply hold them aside to go, then I moved onto wearing pants and lowering them a few inches to go through the zip, and I've also peed out the leg of shorts, so that's pretty much the full gamut!
Yes, it's imperative for the vaster majority of women (or so it seems!) to manipulate the vulva, basically we simply "lift and separate," if you'll pardon the pun. We hold open our lips to avoid spreading the stream of water (creating a messy spray) and lift the tissue mass to obtain a forward angle. This said, it's worth noting that the infinite variety of biological forms means some women need do neither. I've seen a photo of a woman urinating a perfect forward stream, neat and tidy as can be, without touching herself at all.
Speaking for myself, I couldn't imagine not wiping, under all normal conditions. I often hold a tissue unde!
r myself in case of drips, just to be safe, and I use this to quickly dab dry, which is only common sense as it means my panties stay fresh longer.
I hope this satisfies your curiosity!
Cheers,
PV
Louise
Hello Everybody.
STACKED KIMBERLY - Hi there, I forgive you. Thanks for
telling us all about how you had a major shit with your
boyfriend in the room with you. I think you produce
bigger logs than is usual for me, but yeah I can shit
some foot long lumps every now and then. When I do my
really big ones they are often about 3 or 4 inches
thick. Once when I was with my boyfriend on a quiet
beach and I really badly needed to crap. I went behind
some dunes with him and squatted with my bikini bottoms
pulled down to my knees. I tried hard to push out a
huge monster shit, and I had to stop to get my breath
half way through. Steve asked me if I was okay, and I
turned around to show him my bumhole being stretched
open wide by the huge lump I had sticking out of it. I
was nearly crying, the log was so big and it felt real
good when the end of it slipped out and it fell into the
sand. I think Steve enjoyed watching!
me do it as much as
I liked squeezing it out.
I do not know if you had been so close to your boyfriend
before, but it sounded as if he enjoyed himself after you
had been to the toilet. I will tell you that as with you,
the toilet is not the only place I like to sit when I'm
with my boyfriend.
Maybe you will find your boyfriend will be interested in
watching you pee if you are okay with that. Also do not
pass up the chance to see him pee or crap. If you aim his
penis it will make you feel very close to him.
SLAYER MOON - I would like to answer your questions about
girls standing to pee. At least, I would like to tell what
I do, but that does not mean all girls who stand do it the
same. At first I did not know what you meant by 'horse
stance' and it puzzled me. My boyfriend does Kung Fu and
he says it is a common term in martial arts, and I now see
what sort of stance you mean. I made him laugh because
before he told me what it was I thought it was some way for
a horse to stand and not that it got its name because it is
like how a horse rider has his or her legs astride the horse.
Yes, I sometimes use a horse stance.
Other times maybe I stand with my legs closer together if I
do not care much about dribbles. I have two friends with
small pussy lips whose pussies open enough when they stand
in the 'horse stance' for their pee streams almost to miss
hitting their lips at all as it squirts out. My own pussy
lips are large so I wipe whenever I can but I am not too
worried if I can not, such as when I wee outdoors. Also if
I want to I bend over as well. I sometimes pee in the horse
stance without my fingers near my pussy so my wee squirts
out naturally esp if I am on a beach, but I often put my
fingers to each side of my pussy and lift it up and
spalying the lips a little bit. I do not alter my clothing
to help (I d!
o not see how it would) and I sometimes wear
clothes such as my short skirts and knickers if I think I
might have to pee outdoors, and right now I am practicing
peeing out of the front of my jeans without having to pull
them down. I hope that answers your questions. If there is
anything else you want to know, please ask me. I hope you
do well with your new foreskin when you. Your treatment
sounds very unconfortable.
DEE, Hi there. Yeah, I think we must have been at the front
of the bladder queue when they were given out. Hehehe. I
do not know if women are meant to have smaller ones than
men, but I think women can hold it for longer than most men
can. Or maybe it is just that men are far more ready to pull
their cocks out when they really need to go than we are to
drop our pants even now. But yeah, I think we are *well*
above the average bladder size if average is 450ml capacity.
On Satudray night I was out wi!
th Steve, and I had been really
desperate to wee for about an hour. It would have been really
embarrassing to have an accident, but it was ages before I
could get to a place I could just pull my knicks down and let
go. I had on one of my short mini skirts. My belly felt really
streched and full, like a baloon that was filled with so much
water that it would burst. Every step was an agony, but with so
many people around I held on hard and bit my lip. Yes, I do that
too! There were no fountains were we were, but I had to pass a
water leak in the road, and there were two drains with sounds of
running water coming from them. I thought I was going to burst!
When I eventually had the chance, I went with Steve around into
a quiet alley, pulled my knicks aside and just let go. It was
sheer bliss, and it was a real fierce torrent that burst out
from my puss. I was standing facing Steve with my skirt lifted up
and he watched it!
all. He said it was an awesome wee and he timed
it as lasting more than 2 minutes!. I wonder how much I had done.
I know I must have broken my own personal record and there was a
huge, huge puddle! I do not mean to say your 52 seconds is not
as good, but maybe your stream was even more fierce than mine!
LOU - Steve can pull back his foreskin, let go of his cock
completely and he can then pee fine. Oh, and it is not only men
who can pee off bridges! I've done it!
PV - I never mentioned the bridge before, but I did it through the
railings with Steve standing beside me weeing too. It was really
romantic in a way as both our streams fell more than 40 feet into
the river and flowed away...
Louise.
caught peeing
Loiuse-
I have a new peeing outside story to share with you. I had to travel a long ways this weekend and on the way back I
really, really had to pee. I finally saw a rest area sign so I get off the exit. But this rest area was just a bunch of
tiny stores. I was going to pee my pants if I didn't go right then so I noticed a wooded area to the side of the last store and headed there. I walked far back into the wooded area out of view and let it all go. I stood at a tree, which I watered for over a minute. I started out standing straight up while I peed, but I soon realized this was a well-covered area and since I knew it would be a long piss, I leaned back and raised my penis a little higher to make a long stream come out. When I finished peeing, there was a huge pile of pee on the ground in front of the bark of the tree I was at and the bottom of the tree was covered with splash marks from my pee. This was such a great pee and I didn't get caught. Well,!
I'm off to pee, hope you enjoy my lastest tree
watering.
Andy
Nguyen:
I have heard that in some rural areas in Vietnam the men squat to pee while the women stand! Have you heard about that?
Steve
Greetings All.
PV, Sounds like you are very busy. Likewise. I know I don't often get time to post at the moment. That was quite a good piece on enemas that you posted, and it produced a funny story from Louise that she hadn't told me about before. She has such a matter of fact way of describing things and I think she is finding it much easier to write to the forum than she did at first, I think you'll agree. I didn't know her 'bum exploded' as she put it. :)
Dee, Hello there. Louise tells me she has posted about the massive pee she had on Saturday night, so I don't need to go through it again. All I will say is that her stream was really fierce, even more so than I have ever before seen it. Afterwards, the alley she used had a very large puddle right in the middle of it. It would have been interesting to have been abloe to measure her output.
If she did that all the time, she could be dangled above a burning building, wee over it and there would be no nee!
d for firemen on the ground. Awesome! Well, all right, perhaps Louise, yourself, PV and a certain Pakistani girl we saw on a nude beach should all be used one after the other if the fire is in a large buidling!
Sexy and Stacked Kimberley, Yours have been two posts that seem to have provoked a reaction. I certainly think you caused me to react in the way you intended men to react. I think you know what I mean! My girlfriend, Louise, certainly let you know what she thought didn't she? Now you know the sort of treatment Louise gives my ears if she disapproves of anything _I_ do! It was your first post, and perhaps she was a little fierce in her response to it, but I take her point too. Your dumping story was very good, I enjoyed reading it. From the sound of things, your boyfriend should consider himself a very lucky guy if you have let him watch you taking a massive dump. Louise says she has asked already, but (and a simple, non-graphic answer to this please) I will as!
k the question a little more directly. We are both wondering... was the crashing out a log while your boyfriend watched the trigger for the start of the more... physical side to your relationship with him, or were you accustomed to erm...being seen naked by him already? I hope he enjoyed what happened afterwards, by the way!
Bye for now,
Steve.
I went back to school today after my easter holidays. It was a good day and at the end of the day I had P.E in the sun. I was wearing a pair of white underwear, and during the P.E lesson I farted and did a poo in them. Later in the changing room before we went home I pulled off my shorts went to put on my trousers but somebody had hidden them, I walked up and down in my pants looking for them when somebody noticed that I had a poo in them, they all started shouting that I had pooed my pants. I didn’t find it amusing but I found my trousers and put them on and went home with my mate. Hopefully tomorrow won’t be to bad but some people will remember what I did. I didn’t play out either this evening because of what happened. I emptied out the poo when I got home and my pants aren’t to bad so I don’t need to change them
John(VT)
Hi,everyone!
Scirocco:Thanks for your supportive post;I really wasn't sure how the regulars here would take my intro...I knew it
contained some unique elements. Immediately AFTER I submitted it, I perceived another potential problem: would
it get past the censors? (Suggestion: have first time posters read the guidelines BEFORE they submit a post- that
way makes more sense,doesn't it?)Well, I was glad to see it
made it, and in fact when my wife read it she said she felt
it was tastefully done, but after all she's my WIFE!!Again,
glad to hear you could relate!
Dee:Very happy to hear you've been experiencing a recent
elimination bonanza! Excellent, detailed description!
Question:Which episode felt the best? I have my suspicion,
but I won't answer my own question- I'll let you, O.K?
Elena:I agree with J.W., I want to hear more about Nora!
She seemed pretty incredible,from your vivid descriptions...
More, please!
I had a little fun on Sunday. I was talking with my wife's
friend(Zelda)I mentioned previously on the phone, and we had pretty much concluded that we wouldn't be doing any socializing that day, since all three of us had fairly taxing agendas. Just before putting my wife on the line,
however, I mentioned that I'd be willing to stop by for the
right incentive...She laughed knowingly, and mentioned she'd
stop by our place this week on her way home from work to use
our toilet if the timing worked out(we had discussed this
possibility before, since she drives by our place on her way home, and often has afternoon movements). I said great,
handed the phone to my wife, and prepared to get started on
some work I had planned to do. Amazingly, my wife had been
talking to her for less than five minutes when she announced
to me:"John, Zelda just told me the urge to go just hit her!" and almost before I could register this:"She says it
feel!
s like a really big one!"...
The power of suggestion? I beelined it to her house...
Now,she had no problem with my inspection plans,but there
WAS a need to be discreet- she's a single mother, and the
children were home. In fact, one of them was in the bathroom when I got there, but it turned out she was only getting a toothbrush to clean an old fishbowl for a new
goldfish they had just bought. So I was able to "use" the
bathroom, but I was still skeptical of what(if anything)
was in the toilet. My current favorite method is to prolong
my enjoyment by not looking right away in this situation.
So I got down on my knees quietly, opened the seat cover
with my eyes closed,leaned forward and breathed deeply through my nose. I was disappointed. I didn't smell what
I was hoping for. However, calling on my other senses to
verify things "just in case," I did a quick emotional turn
around when I found a single, very solid jobbie (I like!
this
British term!), about ten inches long, and thicker than any
I had seen her do before. Very nice!We did get to chat briefly about it before I left, and she opined that it wasn't any "award winner." I thanked her for being thoughtful enough to share her artwork with me, and assured
her I DID think it was pretty special...interesting to me that it had very little smell... perhaps since it was only
one piece, slid effortlessly in, and then sank? Any other
ideas?
Nick
To Adam in Canada - You can purchase those public toilet seats you mention with the hole in the front at some hardware stores. One place I have seen them at is Home Hardware. But why someone would want one of those I have no idea. I'll take my soft seat any day...
lisa
Hey Redneck. Are you from Colorado or just passing thru?
I live there but won't get into detail so this won't get bumped by the moderator.
Buzzy--what a great shit you had in the woods. I hope to do some of that this summer too. I go hiking in the mountains & love to drop & let loose there.
As I mentioned in an earlier post I had a semi-buddy dump while at the convention a couple weeks ago. (I'm not sure if it actually rates as a REAL buddy dump.
I had the extra greasy hotel pizza & met a friend while walking around. We checked out the dealers room & after a bit she wanted to see the art display. I'd been feeling the efects of the pizza & was farting quite a bit. I'd felt the need to crap before we got to the art room but let it go. After wandering around the room for about 1/2 an hour I couldn't wait anylonger. "I really need to shit" I told her. To my surprise she said "me too". We haeded off to the ladies room. I took the !
3rd stall & she took the 4th. I let out a couple farts as I undid my jeans. She sat before me & let out a stong stream of piss. I sat & peed too. My hole opened up & out came the first turd. It was a shorty that fell with a plop into the bowl. I could here my friend farting & shooting out what sounded like loose poop. I let out an echoing fart & started on my next log. It was slow to come & there was a lot of the crackling noise. My friend let out a couple more farts & then i could hear her grunting & straining. I couldn't say anything though cause I was giving my energy to pushing hard on my load. I don't usually grunt or make much noise (just take hard breaths) but I let out a long GGGGNNNNN sound as i was pushing it out. She was pulling off tp & wiping when she said "man I really needed that. How's yours going?" I finially let the turd fall from my ass with a sigh. Almost done i told her. She said it sounds like you had quite a load.!
I said Yea i sure did. She flushed & went to wash while I dropped a few shit balls. I felt another one coming & leaned forward to push. It continued out until it touched the water & kept coming. When it finially fell it made no splash. I looked at my handy-work & there were 3 logs--1 5 inches, 1 7 inches & 1 10 inches (all estimates) along with 5 balls a little smaller then golfballs. I wiped 3 times & had to flush twice to get it all down. When I went to wash up my friend was waiting. "OK?" she asked. "great. I feel much better now. how about you?" "me too she said."
I've never had an experience like it before. Usually if I go to the bathroom with someone I know it's all business. No discussion or even comments on it. I hope to go with her again sometime.
Any comments or suggestions for next time will be appriciated.
LISA
Dee
Back to my normal habits! I had one of my 'regular' poos after breakfast today; good strong urge, little straining, and everything coming out quickly - one large curved sausage and a big pile of little squiggles (a little larger than usual, but otherwise normal). It's because I usually poo this way that I never pass really huge loads, I think - normally I'm all done after one round, and that's where I stop (my largest single-session dump would probably have been the one I did in an airplane toilet - two BIG logs and a soft lump - again, after being constipated for a few days, though I was thoroughly desperate by the time I reached the toilet). I've never clogged a toilet, though yesterday's lot would probably have been a toilet-clogger if it had all come out in the same shitting (pun intended) but I just can't sit on the toilet for ages. I seldom get constipated, and as far as I remember I've NEVER had it happen when I've eaten so much.
I felt better after passing th!
e first lot, and the second lot hadn't come down yet, so I stopped. The second lot, which was probably helped along by the jogging and the Chinese lunch, was rushed and interrupted because my friends were all waiting. While my regular poos come out really fast, these were slow ones...and while I usually get a strong urge to go, these were mostly more like just 'pressure'.
Thanks for the idea (and sympathy), PV - might try the enema the next time (though I hope that's a long way off)!
BUZZY
TO SIMON-As far as your question about how much people poo-i can only speak for myself and a few people i've seen poo over the years-When i poo,i usually go in 2 or three parts-the first being the most ,with a long sausage poo that comes out slowly and then i sit and wait for part 2 which is uaually soft and comes out fast and most of the time i'm done at that point.It usually takes about 10 mins or so,but sometimes it all comes out at once if it's loose,or i'm sick.Sometimes there is no set pattern-i don't think i poop as much as some people on this forum,i guess i'm about average-most women i've seen poop go more than me-sometimes it was amazing what some women poo-that nurse friend of mine used to do some whoppers! and just when you thought she was done,she'd fart and do another huge load
AS far as what can make you do bigger,longer poops,everyone is different.Sometimes i eat stuff like brown rice and bran cereal to do big dumps and nothing turns out like that and oth!
er times,i just sit down and all of a sudden 2 feet of shit comes out my ass-simon,you just have to find out what works for you-try holding your poop when you first get the urge and wait til it gets really strong and when you sit on the bowl just relax you anus and don't push too hard and sometimes you get some real long ones that way-everyone is different,so try this along with some brown rice and bran flakes os some re-feied beans-let us know how you make out BYE
Coprologist
I have not been able to read or post here for a couple of weeeks. I was impressed by the leaflet on shitting in the great outdoors, it is a topic that has been much neglected, and people do need advice about the most environmentally friendly way to defecate in the woods.
On a totally different topic, has anyone ever been engaged in taking a shit in a public toilet when the mobile phone of someone in the next stall (or their own for that matter) has rung? If so what was the converstion like? "Ring me back later, I'm taking a dump." Or did they just carry on talking while doing their business? IT MUST have happened to someone. I would love to hear what happened.
Mark
To the poster (no name) who poos his pants. You are not alone, I do it too. I do it about 3 or 4 times a week but sometimes I go a couple of weeks without a real accident just a few marks. I sometimes get in a bit of trouble if my mum finds my pants in my room. I hide them if they get very dirty. Mostly it is accidents that I can't help but sometimes I don't remember to go because I get busy with playing or too shy to let anyone see me go to the toilet when I'm out. Also I never ask to use the bathroom in someone elses house which sometimes ends up with dirt in my pants or slightly wet ones. My mum says she doesn't mind if me or my brother have a real accident and can't help doing it but she gets fed up with us being lazy or careless. I think she knows I could sometimes stop it happening if I was a bit more careful. I wish she wouldn't always buy me white pants as it sometimes gets a bit horrible at school if my mates see them but my best friend Peter always gets skiddies in h!
is pants so he doesn't say anything when I have poo in mine. I think he just doesn't wipe properly, I have only noticed him mess himself once but that was a very big accident one morning which he left in his pants for about half an hour. I saw his pants that afternoon at the swimming pool and the stain was about four inches long and two inches wide and dark and flaky. I think it is funny when I see someone with messy stains in their pants.
Donna
I just had to reply to Hiker Uk's posting about defecating in the courntryside. Since my early teens I have often had a poo out of doors and I DO take precautions not to do a jobbie near watercourses etc. However I certainly could not be botherered with all the rigmarole he posts. When Im out walking in the countryside and need a motion I find a suitable place such as in the bushes or behind a wall and, making sure it isnt near watercourses, drop my knickers and do it. I simply leave it lying on the grass or ground and nature will break it down in due time. If coprophageous (shit eating) animals as described eat it fair enough, (and if you read an old post of mine there was an incident when I passed a really big jobbie which had mysteriously disappeared an hour or so later, I think eaten by some creature). That's surely part of nature's way of disposal of dung. I have read that in the US National Parks one is supposed to do ones motions in a bag and dispose of them elsewhere. !
As far as I am aware this hasnt arisen yet in the UK, at least not where I go for country walks. Thanks Hiker UK for the info, but I will take it under advisement.
Dee, I bet you felt a lot better for getting that big load out over the course of a day. I have had similar experiences when I have been a bit constipated then have passed the accumulated backlog of poos as 3 or 4 big fat jobbies in 3 or 4 sittings in the course of one day.
Kelly P Im glad your husband has done his load . Perhaps if he agrees you should accompany him to the toilet the next time he is constipated and rub his ???? to help him.
Richard
You know in some childbirth scenes in movies where the actresses are grunting and straining in labor, it sounds like they're trying to make a big motion. The best two examples I can think of this is Brooke Shields in The Blue Lagoon and Molly Ringwald in For Keeps. Anyone else have any others?
Wednesday, May 03, 2000