Ashley G

niece poop

Hi it's been quite awhile since I last posted. I'm the moand of two daughters,14 & 17 who I have posted about before,along with my oldest niece Ally who is 14 as well. Today I'm going to talk about my younger niece (Ally's sister) who is 11.


Big hard turds

hello! can anyone tell me how to get firmer and wider turds?

i've tried holding for 3 days. eating only white bread, or white rice and drink very little. this result in big poops but no need for pushing, just slide right out.

I have never been constipated. Normally I poop every day, solid but very soft.

I would like to experience pushing out a really wide and dry turd some time in my life :)

Over the weekend my nieces were here hanging out here with us. I was inside cleaning while the girls were out in the yard. Lauren comes in the house as I'm cleaning the bathroom sink and says "I need to poop can i or do I need to wait?" "No is fine hun I say". She lowers her shorts and underwear and sits as the toilet is next to the sink. We make small talk for a minute as I hear her push...she let's out a loud long fart which we both giggle too. "I've been needing to do that" she says..she let out several poos over the next couple minutes. She looks down in the bowl and says "should I flush before I wipe so it all goes down,I kinda did alot". I say yes probably since your cousins and sister have blocked my toilet many times. She stands up and says "see"..I look in and there's two thick poos at the bottom sticking up and 3 or 4 medium sized logs floating.."That IS a lot of poop"..she says "yeah I do that all the time" she flushes,wipes then flushes again. Hopefully I'll be posting more often again

Ashley G



To Anna : Guess you felt relieved after pooping could tell you really had to go. Great story and looking forward to your next post.

To Bongo D : I wonder what the next person would say seeing your large brown log. Nice and simple story but very interesting. Love to read more posts from you.

To Natalie : I agree with you totally. Its really sad some people are trying to ruin this site. This is a site where people all over the world of any age or gender can feel free to talk about their toilet habits and stories. Without being shy.
Natalie would love to read about that story about you and your :) Looking forward to it

Thats all for now guys. Have a nice day and happy pooping to you all
Lets all keep this site safe and protect it

Your Friend
Gerald :)

Student (NL)

Going in the woods - continued

We (gf and I) are still on vacation, living in a tent. For one month now we have had to go to toilet in nature. I was not at all used to it but my gf was more used to outdoor life so she was quite relaxed about it. But now it is not any longer a problem to me either. Just picking up the roll of toilet paper and go away to find some shelter behind a stone or a dense bush, pull down, squat and open up. During last week the amount of tourists around has been increasing and at all suitable spots for wildcamping there are tents and/or mobile homes. Especially those of us camping in a tent at such places have no other choice than going somewhere in nature when urge appears. And in the morning one may regularly see others lurking around to find a suitable place to hide to take care of those private things. My feeling is that most hikers/campers try to respect the need of privacy for oneanother but inevitably one may come across others sitting there with shorts around the ancles, seldom very close but more often on some distance. I have seen men as well as women, not only young people but even matures. I have searched the net and noted that there is a lot of sites telling how to do and not to do it so I guess that it is something that all outdoor people know very well. Perhaps I will write later too. We are going to stay around for at least one more month.


Summer camp bathroom stories PART 1

Hey guys! :) so I promised that I'd share a story about a time that I pooped with a friend. I actually have a few stories to share that are kind of long and will probably take some explaining so i might split it into two parts. After all, I type my posts while on the toilet, and if I sit here too long my family might get worried about me! However, I promise these posts have good content. There will be some poop, so don't read on if that kind of stuff grosses you out. Buckle up! Anyways, i'll start with some information about me. I'm 5'8, brunette, with a medium body. I'm in pretty good shape. My boobs are medium sized (c cups) and I have a roundish butt (not sure why I need to share that information, it just seems like a trend on this website. I think it helps get a better mental picture of the story as well). Im 17, and I just finished my junior year of high school. I have lots of friends, but I don't want to call myself a "popular" girl, because most of those girls are pretty mean. I definitely am well liked within my school, however. I would probably lose that status if rumors spread that I used a website like this. Some people just don't understand. I only have one friend who knows, and she's posted on this site before. Her name is Emma, and she has an embarrassing poop story about her boyfriend on page 2539 if you want to read it. after being a long time lurker, Emma told me about that story so I encouraged her to post it here. Then, I started posting for myself. Anyways, I'll start my story now.

I'm going to write about my visit to church camp a few weeks ago. Our camp was in a mountainous, forested area in Kentucky. It felt very "campy". There were about 20 girls to a room (bunk beds) and each room shared a bathroom. The bathroom had two stalls, a sink, and two showers. The bathrooms at the rooms had very little privacy. The gaps between the doors were giant. Maybe three inches. You could practically see everything going on in the stall. The stall door also wasn't very tall. If a girl was sitting up straight, you could see her face. The camp was a week long, so most of the girls were bound to have to poop sooner or later. I peed in those everyday, but never pooped there. I'm the kinda girl that doesn't hold it, and just poops when she has to go, but I still never used those.That's because those aren't the only bathrooms we visited while at camp. Every day after lunch, a bus would drive us about five miles to a lake, where we would swim and hang out until sundown. There were some interesting bathrooms here. There was a small building that looked like a long outside. Basically, it was a bunch of wooden porta-potties connected side-by-side, so that the doors opened up to the outside. They had a latch inside a that activated an "occupied" sign on front. At first glance, the potties appeared to be more private. Not many kids used them, so I assumed they must have been peeing in the lake (gross). I decided not to pee in the lake, so on the first day I went to investigate. I had to pee a little bit, so I took one of the potties and turned the latch. There were no gaps in the doors, or the walls. It was almost exactly like a porta potty. The seat was plastic, so I wiped it with some paper. I looked down into the toilet bowl and saw that it flushed like a regular toilet, probably to a septic tank behind the small building. Because our camp only allows one piece bathing suits, I had to take my swim suit all the way off to pee. I sat down naked on the toilet seat. It felt kind of uncomfortable at first, but the stall felt very private. However, as I looked around, I noticed it's flaw. Try to picture this as I explain it. The two side walls of the stall didn't quite reach the back wall of the building, so there was about a 4 inch gap in between the two side walls and the back wall. Because of this, if you leaned all the way back while sitting on the toilet, you could see straight into the the stall next to you through the gap! If you leaned close to the gap, you could see the entire toilet seat. I was just finishing my pee when I heard someone enter into the stall on my left. I didn't want to peek right away, because if I can see them, it means that they can see me. I sat for a moment, listened to the sound of wet clothes rustling, then I heard a stream of pee go into the toilet. It sounded very heavy. I very slowly leaned back, until I could see the back half of the toilet seat. A stream was going into the toilet, but no one was sitting on it. It had to have been a boy who was standing and urinating at the same time. If I had leaned a little closer, I probably could have caught a glimpse of his man parts, but then I would probably also be able to see his face, and he would be able to see me!!! That would have been awkward. His pee was only about 20 seconds long. He didn't flush and left abruptly. I sat for about 30 more seconds, and I started to shiver because I was still wet. I heard another person enter to my left. I sat silently for a few seconds and listened. Once again, I heard a wet swimsuit rustling, but this time it was as if it was being removed. Then, I heard the distinct THUD of bare butt cheeks on a toilet seat. This gave me the green light to peek. I leaned backwards and slightly to the left, and I could see a tan, ???? ass. The butt had a small tanline where a swimsuit was worn. I leaned a little closer until a could see the back of his/her head. I recognized her as my friend Nicole! She has her elbows on her knees and her swimsuit around her thighs. She was leaning forward a lot, so that I could see her hole when she sat. I sat and watched, expecting a pee, but instead I saw her butthole begin to pucker slightly. Suddenly, a long brown, smooth poop erupted from her bottom and almost flowed into the toilet. She grunted as it left her, and another poop, probably about 6 inches long, immediately followed. Her butthole continued to pucker, but nothing came out. She grunted again, but still nothing. She took her right arm and braced it against the side of the stall. When she did this, I could see her right nipple on the side of her breast. Awkward. She starting breathing a little more heavily and grunted again until a poo started to ease out. After it was about 2 inches out, the rest of the poop slid out fairly quickly and slid into the toilet. Nicole then began to pee. As she did this, she turned to reach and grab some toilet paper, so I quickly ducked back to where she could not see me. It was interesting to see my friend like that. Anyways, I leaned back just enough to see the back of her bottom, and I watched Nicole wipe. She wiped about four times, then dissapeared from view l. I heard her put her swimsuit on, flush, and then leave. I decided it was time to leave as well, so I wiped, slipped my swimsuit back on, and then left. I returned a to the shore of the lake where my friends were. My friend Taryn looked at me smiling and asked, "how was your shit?". I didn't want to explain to her why I was in the bathroom for ten minutes so I just blushed and said, "it was great". I know she was only teasing me. However, I could definitely make fun of taryn if I wanted to. Taryn is a nervous pooper, and she NEVER poops away from home. However I found out later that she couldn't hold it the whole week. I'll write about that in part 2!!!!


Exercising Control

Hi all, been quite a long time since I've lurked or posted, nice to come back.

First a comment: Really enjoying all of the toilet car stories. I wish I knew someone that'd let me do that, I would love to soak their seats and leave a nice log on the floor.

I had a fun experience the other day I wanted to share. So I have a friend that is also very open about pooping. We send each other pictures and videos of ourselves all the time, it's really nice having someone who enjoys watching a nice BM as much as I do. My wife isn't shy about peeing, but she still is about pooping.

Anyway. I was on the couch in nothing but a bathrobe, playing a video game, when I felt like I needed to poop. Not real bad, but I knew if I sat down on the toilet I would. I needed to pee, too. But I decided to try something. I decided to see how far I could push and how long I could hold it out without actually making a mess on the couch.

So I flipped up my robe and grabbed my phone and opened the camera (I like to watch myself, too!) and with one hand I spread my cheeks and held the phone with the other. I began to push and had to try real hard not to pee myself. I pushed and pushed until I could feel the little turtle head poking out of my hole, then I tried to hold it there as long as I could (only about a couple seconds) before squeezing and pulling it back in. I watched the little clip I'd made and sure enough I could see the little brown tip just starting to open up my anus.

I did this a few more times, each time I tried to push it out farther and hold it longer. Each time I videoed it and watched as the turd grew larger and poked out of my butt a little further before I pulled it back in. The sensation of pushing and holding back at the same time was incredible, and I knew it was going to be a wonderfully relaxing movement when I finally let it go.

Wanting to up the challenge to myself I went upstairs to be bathroom and took my robe off and squatted, one hand in front to steady myself and one behind with the camera phone. Again I pushed until it felt like I was right on the edge of the point of no return, held it there and then squeezed it back in. I watched the little video and I was amazed I hadn't dropped a log with that one, it was sticking probably a full inch out of my butt! I went one more time, pushing and pushing and then holding it, but oops. I pushed too far. When I squeezed that one, I pinched off a little turd, and a small brown piece fell on the floor. It was very solid, though, so I just picked it up with a piece of toilet paper and put it in the toilet, no mess to clean up.

I decided that was probably enough and sat on the toilet to finish my business. I was right, it was a huge relief to finally be able to push long enough to get it going, then the poo just slid right out of me. And it was a long one! Not too thick, so it didn't hurt, just felt great coming out of my butt. My bowels felt refreshingly empty. I really enjoyed the risk I was running of pooping on the couch;it's leather so would have been easy to clean if I had pushed too far, and I do enjoy using things that aren't toilets for my toilet.

Hope you enjoyed. I know some people like feeling desperate and then the relief after. Has anyone else intentionally prairie dogged it?

Toilet car

Please continue posting!

Glad to see you're back and can't wait to see the next installment.


Huge Smelly poop

On Sunday afternoon after i finished having my lunch which was beans stew with fried plantain i began to pass airy farts that really stank. I began to know the beans had already started working hahaha Bcos when i eat beans my farts really stink. I began to feel some build up in my rectum meaning a trip to the toilet is near so i decided to go after i finished reading a book i was reading. After about an hour it became intense and i quickly went to the bathroom and sat on the toilet. I hadnt gone since Monday so it was sure going to be a huge one. My anus began to open as i felt the tip poking out.....i didnt have to push since it was soft or will i say mushy rather. It began to increase in length accompanied by a pungent smell thanks to the beans i ate. Then i fell plomp! Another began coming out which also the rest began to come out really fast like a snake was coming out of my anus. My poop was golden brown in colour by this time i had completly soaked the water in my toilet with poop and i still had more in me. I had been in therr for 40mins. Completely destroying my toilet and stinking up my bathroom....i was finally done in the next 15mins i think wiped my butt it was very messy so i wiped 5 times. I look in the toilet and was proud of my toilet creation or will i say work of art hahaha. I flushed and the water began to rise and it sudenly went down with a force but my toilet was still dirty so i flushed again and used the toilet brush to scrub it and then i flushd it once more. I sprayed the bathroom with an air freshener but it seems my poop scent over powered it so i left smilling to my room. i met my mom on the way to the bathroom when i heard her from my room complaining about my scent and shouting calling my name....
Hope you liked my story....

Read some of the previous stories and saw a post by Miss Belinda seems she hasnt been on in a while she has really amazing stories She should post again if she is reading
Seen stories from an Asian girl too called Mina i dont know but i like her stories they are so real and can see she does huge poops

Love to read stories of girls pooping with their friends

Monday, June 13, 2016


Update, but no stories x

Hey! Hope everyone is well?,

Without delving in to too much detail,
I just i'd do a quick post on my functions of late.
They had been getting worse with my IBS-D and i have
Had trouble holding urgent loo visits, so...
My husband treated me to some diapers for my own comfort
And i started wearing them last Tuesday. It's now Sunday and
I'm getting on great with them, they're certainly helping.
I also saw my doctor and my IBS tablets have been changed so i hope to get on better with those. My doctor knows i am wearing diapers for now but he doesn't want me to use them long term.
Meanwhile i will continue to use them for as long as i need them.
More soon, love Jemma. :)

This morning I was out shopping at the mall. I had bought a large coffee at Starbucks and while I was looking for a new bag all of a sudden I really needed a poo. I quickly payed for the bag and then headed for the clostest bathroom. A lady entered right at the same time I did, a brunette who looked like she was maybe 30 or so. She held the door open for me and I smiled and said thanks. There were four stalls with two of them taken. The women took the stall on the very end leaving the one besides her's for me. I locked the door, hung up my new bag, pulled down my pink thong, pushed up my skirt and sat on the toilet. Then I peed and so did my neighbour. I had a quick peek and I noticed that she had pushed her green panties all the way down to her sandals. The women in the other stalls had both flushed and left in the meantime. I was gonna see if the other woman would leave, but when I was done peeing I couldn't really hold it in any longer and a big turd started to slide out of my backdoor. It was really wide and streched my bumhole and I couldn't help but letting out quite a noticeable moan and also a loud fart. It was pretty embarrasing, with the other woman in the stall right next to me. Then thankfully I could hear her starting to poo as well. There were plopping sounds as she quickly dropped three poos into her toilet. I had more coming and pushed out another long turd and had another fart. I had a look at my phone and then after another minute or so I did one final piece and my neighbour also did two more. I pulled off some toilet paper and wiped my front and my backside. It was a bit of a sloppy poo so I needed quite a lof of sheets to clean up between my bumcheeks. The other woman was wiping as well and then we both flushed and left our stalls. We smiled at each other at the sinks while washing our hands. I blushed a tiny bit, but at least we both had done poos so it wasn't too bad. There was also no big stink, just a really faint poop smell, so I was pretty proud of that, too. I felt really relieved and stayed at the mall for another hour or so before I had another quick pee and then went home. That's my story for today, I hope you liked it.

Oh, also I did an outdoor pee while mountain biking with my friend Amber yesterday. We had climbed a big ridge and it was totally gorgeous. When we got to the top I really needed to go. I told Amber and she said she did, too. We put down the bikes and both went behind some shrubs. I did quite a long pee and also had a small fart but I don't think Amber could hear it. It only took us about a minute or so for our pees. I have a lot of outdoor activity planned this summer, so hopefully I will have some more stories to share.

Brandon T, you asked for story. I have, but it takes long time and it is late now, so I keep for next time and tell you simple one which is this morning.

Very simple, because it was ordinary time in loo, but Kazuko stay night with us, so maybe bit special.

Maho didn't need loo but I did and Kazuko too. Kazoo say, Mina you go first, I brush teeth. So I sat down. After about 1 minute my bottom open.

I have to say, Natalie I understand you very well! Because me too, I sometimes sit 30 minutes and solid motion come out many waves, one after other. Maho is same, and more often than me.

This time too, motion came out slowly, a bit hard but not so hard, came out and plop, next come immediately, plop, then next. I wonder when I stop? Of course I stop, after many plops. Kazuko and Maho say, Mina you finish? I say, no, sorry. Kazuko say, I want see. so I lift up bottom and Kazuko look and she say, Mina you did about 14!! But I think, more like ten. Mao also look and the she flush. They know I don't finish. Soon more plop sounds under me, but more smaller than before ones. Then suddenly very short burururu and I empty! So I used washlet and then Kazuko wipe me and I feel she tremble a bit. Maho also wipe, then I get up and Kazuko sit down. "Very warm seat!" she say, and she pull me from washbasin and kiss me on top of head.

Soon Kazuko's bottom very busy, we hear lots of plop noise and it is faster than my one. So Maho and me, we sit near Kazu. Kazu smile, Maho give her little kiss, then I give. Kazuko smile again and start to push. More noise, burururururu pause burururururu pause burururururu. Then she finish and use washlet. I take paper to wipe her, but when I wipe, I feel choky, I make whimper noise and tears in my eyes. But I wipe. Maho also wipe and she is little tremble too. By the way washlet not perfect, tiny little brown piece on paper when I wipe.

We have to go work, but we are early bird so 20 minutes on loo - me 10 and Kazu 10 - not big deal. We have time for hug after finish, and I cry little bit again, but only little. Maybe you fed up with silly crying baby Mina.

But so many people say, Mina nice story! You are so so kind to me! I think wonderful that we can share very important thing in life even we hide it in the public. Some one said gross, maybe it is Natalie? but I don't think gross. On this site, activity of loo is so beautiful thing. I and my friends never think gross when we read story with detail of motion and wee. If writer feel good, we feel good too and we are happy. If writer have bad time, we angry and sad.

Natalie, you can tell Taryn, when timing is good, sit on log and pull swimwear and do many motion on ground is never gross. She release call of nature in nature, I feel normal thing.

And your story not too long, not too short. For me to translate take long time but with friends, long time is short time!!

Love from Mina and friends

Michael E

Metamucil and Trash Cans in Men's Bathrooms

I'm going to add the initial E to my name, because there's another Michael apparently. If you don't know me, I've posted on earlier pages about my bowel movements in high school during cross country and track, as well as one in summer camp.

Psyillum Husk is seeming to work for me. Ever since I started my job I've been having infrequent movements, and it had gotten uncomfortable. Trying to adjust my diet isn't easy as one would think, between my routine for work and then after I usually eat dinner, go to the gym, spend time on the computer, and then go to bed. There's not a lot of room to eat.

I joined a gym recently, and it's great stress relief, because it's open all day. This is also good for my bowels. I have had one bowel movement at the gym. Four days ago, I had went to the bathroom at the gym, when I went to go change. I sat down as my stomach was really hurting and I bent over, I only had to push a little bit and what felt like a large turd slithered out. When I peered between my legs I could see the end of it. I stood up and saw one big thick log. It was mushy at the end, and one thick piece on the side. I brought baby wipes to clean up, which I threw in the trash can. (I don't flush them, even if they are flushable), and then flushed the toilet. I flushed twice, but there were still plenty of skidmarks.

That brings me to another point, should there be trash cans in each stall of the men's bathroom? I think so. Baby wipes, disposable catheters, enemas, aren't flushable, and it would probably reduce the incidence of clogging. What do you think? As well as older people who have incontence issues, he can put his diaper/incontience pad in the trash in privacy, instead of walking out and putting it in the communal trash can.

Yesterday, I had a very thick bowel movement. Probably due to the way I had been eating. My stomach hurt, it was just a little crampy, and when I finally got myself seated on the toilet, I pushed, and I really had to push, as I felt a very big turd come out. A splash, and then a thud sound. I stood up and saw a thick turd, 2 to 3 inches thick. It also smelled pretty bad and went from dark to very light brown in colour, but it had no blood on it, which surprised me. Nor was there blood on the toilet paper.

Welp, until next time. Toodles!

Karen C.

Reply to Nick's Survey

REPLY to Nick's Bladder and BM survey

1. How large is your bladder? (Rate 1-10, 1 being tiny, 5 being average, 10 being mega sized)
I guess mine would be about an 8 or 9. I can hold it for a long time if I have to.

2. How strong is your bladder? (Rate 1-10, with 1 being abnormally weak, 5 being average, 10 being iron strength)
Maybe an 8 or 9. Not bad for a gal my age, huh?

3. About how much liquid do you drink in a day?
Lots. I drink almost a whole pot of coffee in the morning, then I have OJ with my breakfast, then count the milk I use on my cereal and with lunch and dinner. And water I use for cooking. Oh, and then there's iced tea, I drink about a pitcher a day, and I'm rarely without a bottle of water I'm sipping. Gatorade if I'm doing something sweaty.

4. What do you usually drink? What drinks make you pee the most?
Coffee first thing. OJ with ????. I like milk with my meals. I drink a lot of iced tea. I'm a water freak throughout the day, luv my water filter or bottled waters. Also enjoy lemonade in the evenings. An occasional soda. An occasional beer. A rum and coke now and again. Anything with alcohol or caffeine makes me pee alot. Gatorade feels like it just gets absorbed into my body's tissues and doesn't do much in the way of making me pee on it's own.

5. How often do you pee?
Depends on how much I drink vs. how much I sweat.

6. How often do you have urinary accidents?
Only time I've had a pee accident is when I was pregnant, usually while also as a result of the force of throwing up.

7. When was your last accident?
Well over 30 years ago.

8. Do you usually pee when you poop?
Yes. Before, during, and after.

9. How long can you hold a full bladder of urine?
My record is from Houston to LA nonstop, via automobile.

10. Any interesting stories related to peeing or urinary accidents?
Not really. Once when I was pregnant I went to Bob's Big Boy for lunch with a couple of friends, felt sick to my stomach and went to the bathroom to throw up and while doing so I wet my pants and had to buy a newspaper to sit on in the car for the ride home.


1. How often do you poop?
Once or twice in the morning after my coffee.

2 What kind of BM's do you usually have? (Talking about consistency, so feel free to use the bristol stool chart, or describe them yourself)
Usually several short logs followed by thick mud and then drippy.

3. How large are your BM's
See above.
4. How would you describe the smell? (None, weak, moderate, strong, very strong, or vomit-worthy)
It doesn't bother me, but my ex hubby and my boys have always begged to differ!

5. How often do you have accidents?
Almost never. Recently I had a bout of food poisoning from hotdogs and messed up a good pair of slacks when I had to go out. Wouldn't have happened if there were more public restrooms available such as in Europe where they have them all over the place. Here in America you basically have to first find a place to pull into, then find a parking spot, and then pray that there is an empty stall.

6. How often do you clog toilets?
Never flush tampons down the toidy! Don't ask me how I know! Haha.

7. How do you wipe? (Front to back or back to front, and do you do so sitting or standing)
Front to back always. Don't want any nasty infections! Always wipe sitting or sqatting if I'm in the woods or the side of the road.

8. How loud are you during a normal bowel movement? (No noise, quiet, moderate, noisy, very noisy, or extreme)
I'd have to say that I'm on the quiet side; though I've had diarrhea that could rattle the windows!

9. How often do you get constipated? What do you do when constipated? What foods and/or drinks make and/or worsen constipation?
When I was younger and ate stuff most typical guys eat, I took Dulcolax nightly. Now I don't often get constipated because I eat a high fiber balanced diet. When I get constipated I turn to a number of options varying from increasing my fruit intake, namely two or three apples before bed for mild cases. I find that eating a lot of roasted peanuts also is usually enough to get things moving. I know of no constipating drinks, but too much cheese will clog me up, and military MRE's will do the same. After a big meal of pizza or lasagna, for example, I know to take a laxative before bed or else. On the flip side lots of cheese is great for stopping diarrhea. On the extreme side of things, an enema will when nature won't, and it will do it fast.

10. How often do you get diarrhea? What foods and/or drinks cause or worsen diarrhea?
Few times a year. Too much beer usually does it to me. Fresh corn or fresh spinach makes me blow it out like a goose!

11. Would you rather have constipation or diarrhea? Why?
Constipation is miserable but so is diarrhea. I vote for constipation because with diarrhea there is no control over the time and place it may happen. When I have diarrhea I am almost always also sick with uncontrollable vomiting, and I absolutely HATE throwing up! With constipation I get nauseous but at least it doesn't interfere with my daily schedule and most importantly I can correct it so that the relief happens at a time and place of my choosing. Constipation is basically a stomach ache but at least I don't have to worry about having an accident or not being able to find a bathroom NOW!

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