Older & Wiser
to Korrie:
I agree with your feelings about teaching kids not to sit in someone else's urine on public toilets! Even when I was in high school (Class of '93) I found it gross. Sometimes, I had to pee really bad and would come into the bathroom between classes with perhaps 2 minutes until the bell, and I would get my hopes up when I saw one door out of perhaps two dozen was ajar. However, as soon as I saw the urine on the seat I would do an about-face (sorry--my husband's military) and wait for another stall to open. In doing so and really hurtin', if you know what I mean, and sit themselves right down in the urine. I don't even know if they saw it. I remember one day when I had to crap really bad and I was already farting up a storm and knew I would be holding in my eruption momentarily while I waited in line, and I was counting the seconds until I could pull my dress up and panties down. The door opens slightly and this girl--who I think was a freshman and very inexperienced--asked me to go to one of the hand towel dispensers and tear her off two or three paper towels from the roll. I did and when I looked in to hand them to her I could see that she was sitting on on literal nest of toilet paper, at least 5 or 6 layers that were hanging out from the sides or her thighs and over the front of the seat. She literally had used up all the toilet paper and was using the paper towels to wipe with! The bell rang and she pulled up her jeans and panties real fast and went dashing out of the stall. She neglected to flush and a few of the papers slipped on the floor. In order to prevent an accident and to cut down on the time I would be tardy to my geometry class, I quickly decided to take over her nest. I latched the door, pulled down my panties and my dress started to knock a few of the tissues off but I didn't care.It seemed so different to be sitting on such a soft cushion and within two or three seconds I dropped a very well formed two-foot log that deposited itself onto the five or six much smaller contributions she had made to the bowl. I have always found irony to be amusing. Here I had the best arsenal for wiping in my career and all I really needed was one or two of the tissues to clean myself. With a full bowl and so much paper to flush, I didn't want to chance it so I just pulled up my panties (but in doing so I found I had two of the tissues sticking to my butt), made my dress presentable and hurried off to class. That was the strangest and warmest and softest crap I took in my 4 years at NHS. My 8-year-old daughter doesn't always look first before sitting down when we're away from home. From urine on the seats to nests, you never know what you're going to encounter in a public bathroom, do you.Brenda
This is only my second post because I am very shy and self conscious about such personal things as the toilet. But I do read all of your posts because many are so helpful.
To: Anonymous. Thank you so much for your reply to Debbie where you wrote; "Sometimes, if we are both just sitting there in silence, I wonder if she wants to push hard, but is self conscious and doesn't want me to hear. In these cases, if I am also trying to poo, I just make my grunting sounds quite audible, in the hope that she will feel more comfortable doing the same. This has worked several times.
I have been in exactly that situation so many times. My parents were very strict on "potty discipline" when I was growing up. I'm in my 30s now and still conditioned by what was constantly preached to me, mostly by my mother but often my father as well.
I can recite their golden rules:
1. It's essential to have a BM every day - without fail.
2. Sit on the toilet every day until you have your BM no matter how long it takes.
3. Push hard if needed to help your BM come out.
4. If you haven't had a BM by bed time then you are constipated and you need a laxative.
5. As soon as you feel the urge, find a toilet immediately and sit until you have your BM
6. Never hold a BM in.
There were additional rules for public restroom etiquette
7. Its polite to keep an empty stall between yourself and the next person
8. Always wipe the seat before sitting
9. Never ever allow gas to make a noise
10. Never make noises no matter how hard you are pushing or how much it hurts coming out.
11. Never talk to anyone else while you or they are performing.
Not long ago I was shopping at the mall when I felt the first twinges telling me I should make for the restroom. When I got there only the two furthest stalls were available so I picked the one at the very end. I wiped the seat of course, sat down and made myself comfortable. I must have sat there for at least five minutes during which time I started to feel my BM building inside me but it didn't seem it was likely to be opening me any time soon. I started to push gently and that made no difference. I took a deep breath, held it and pushed much harder, this time feeling my BM start to press on the inside of my ring. It was just as I was letting my breath out that the stall next to me became occupied.
There was all the usual preparatory rustle until she sat down and at last quiet was restored. I regained my composure, took a deep breath, closed my eyes, leaned forward and started to push as hard as I could. This time I felt my ring beginning to open and thought to myself "Thank goodness it's starting to come". After a few seconds I sat up straight for a moment to catch my breath and prepare for the next push. Again I leaned forward, eyes closed, holding my breath and pushed as hard as I could.
It was while I was pushing I heard a loud moan from the next stall which left me in no doubt she was in considerable pain. It startled me of course but I was so absorbed in my own problems I readied myself for my next push. I was part way thought this push and I could feel my face burning with the exertion and my whole body tense with the pressure, when another long and painful moan came from the next stall. At the same time I finally felt my ring opening wide and my BM slowly coming out. I don't know exactly what happened but I'm sure it was hearing the person next to me, I suddenly forgot all my years of conditioning and in a last desperate push I moaned loud and long as my BM finally passed my ring and dropped silently into the bowl.
The relief I felt was unbelievable, not just because I had finally let out a very difficult BM but because I let my feelings out as well. Then with a very strained voice I heard the woman say, "Are you OK hun….."? I was still getting my breath back but I answered hesitantly, "Yes….thanks….I am now…..are you OK too?". There was a pause then in a very strained voice she said "A sec………" followed by a long painful groan and a big sigh of relief…"Yes….I am now…." and another sigh of relief.
We both finished up our paperwork, came out of our stalls almost together and washed our hands. She was an older woman, I think in her mid 50s, well dressed and very well spoken. She looked at me with a very engaging smile and looking around quickly said quietly, "At least I'm not the only one that has a hard time on the pot….but it's my fault really, I shouldn't have let it go this long". I couldn't help it, I stifled a giggle in disbelief at this stranger telling me about her most personal toilet problems, obviously with constipation.
My point about all of this is that I read from several of you that a daily BM isn't important. I see some hold their BMs in until they are sure it will come out nice and easily when they eventually decide to sit on the pot. Still others are like me, very conservative, and do their BMs in forced silence when in fact a groan of discomfort or even an encouraging word from the next stall would make an otherwise very difficult experience much more bearable.
Should I simply abandon what my parent taught me after all these years? Is what they taught me wrong? Please help. Love - BrendaDan Boy
My friend just came back from Africa after spending time on a wildlife reserve type thing. She brought me probably one of the most amazing things I've ever tasted. And that is jerky made from Impala meat. However, I just took one of the biggest craps I've taken in a long time. I dunno what that spice was that's in it (kind of like curry but not quite), but man, I don't think I've ever had a worse shit in terms of pain before going, amount of crap released, overall smell. As soon as I woke up, BAM! I usually weigh myself every morning (I know it's only accurate to do once a week, but I like doing it anyway, gives me something to do when I wake up) and I was 224 pounds. I did a double take because I'm normally 220 and I haven't gained weight like that in over a year. I've actually been on a steady decline since Feb (I've lost 20 pounds so far). Then I got the cramps and knew I had to shit. I sit down, and this turd basically shoots out of me. Not with any gas, but extremely quick. I look in the bowl and the thing is about 2 feet long (no kidding). It was curling up and around the bowl, and I almost never shit anything that big in one piece. I get up, forgo wiping since I'm about to hop in the shower, and start brushing my teeth. Halfway through that, I have to sit back down again and a flood of mush pours out of my ass for 15 seconds or so. I let out some small farts, and as if by magic, all the pain in my gut is gone. I finish brushing my teeth, and step back on the scale. Surprise! 220lbs I had lost 4 whole pounds of shit in about 5 minutes. I feel fantastic right now. But now I'm late for work. Later.
Friday, June 27, 2008
AJ :-) Loves Russell ;-)
Blissey, I think that something's going around.
Starting last week, I began to get loose stools that soon began to graduate into watery stools.
Russell and I are not on good terms at the moment. That didn't cause this problem because I was starting to have problems even before that. However, I'm sure that it hasn't helped it any.
By Monday, I was feeling really bad.
Russell and I have been on the outs since Thursday. I don't think that this has as much to do with anything that I've done as it has with the mood he's in. I'm guessing that he's run into some snags when it comes to having things in place to take our mission into the next important phase, and he's simply venting.
For now, he doesn't want to deal directly with me, so his co-chairman is my contact.
I IMed his co-chairman on Monday and found out that he also wasn't feeling well.
Our CEO and I are pals with a lot in common. We both are writers and about the same age. We've even had some similar life experiences.
It just so happened that she had the same kind of nasty bug a few weeks ago, and she told me to do what her mother always had her to do--eat cheese and crackers.
I told her that as soon as I was able to eat, I'd make that the first thing to go into my mouth. However, at the moment, it made me feel like throwing up to even THINK of food--which is unusual for me, because I love to eat.
When my stomach was a little less queasy, I had some cheese, crackers, a banana, a fudge stick, and a can of diet ginger ale.
While I'm not completely back to normal, my bowels have gotten solid again (for now, anyway). I have part of my appetite back, but it's a reduced version of it--which might help me to reduce! LOL
I've had two solid BMs now. Yesterday, I didn't stand up to look at what was there, because I was a little on the weak side where I didn't stand up or sit down a whole lot.
I do know that it was gassy sounding, but not like diarrhea. Instead, it was just like I was passing more gas than poop. The reason for this was probably that I didn't have a lot of matter collected in my intestines.
Today, I made kind of soft poofing and crackling sounds. It didn't feel as if I were dropping a lot, but I stood up to take a look to see what I'd produced.
I was surprised to find out that it was a fairly large amount, but it was all very skinny and separated. It was about the color of breakfast sausage links and looked a little like that only more squiggly.
Debbie, that was something about your sharing a bathroom experience with one of my favorite singers.
Here's something in reverse.
One of my mom's first cousins had gas trapped inside of her that refused to budge, so she called her doctor and asked to be prescribed to something that would bring her relief.
He gave her some pills to take before eating a meal.
She went out to dinner with her niece and her niece's husband, and she took her first dose.
She was expecting that it wouldn't take effect that fast--or she would at least have more control over the situation.
They got in the car to drive back to her place, and she suddenly had this MAJOR urge to break wind BIGTIME!
She hoped that she would have time to get home and run into the bathroom.
But she could feel it demanding to get out.
When they got home, she jumped out of the car first and let one rip!
This is a woman who was in her mid-seventies and looked like Barbara Bush.
However, her nephew-in-law had played the perfect gentleman by also hurrying out his side of the car with plans to go around to her side to open the door for her.
He got a face-full when he got around to her side of the car just in time to be blasted by her ripper!
She did feel better, but decided that these pills would not be what she'd be using in the future to get the job done because they were too unpredictable.
I wrote a poem about her experience and sent it to her.
It cracked her up so much that even looking at the envelope in which I'd sent it made her start laughing!
Sometime later, her sister (J. who was in her late seventies and looked more like the type who might do something like that than her sister did--being a kind of chubby-retired-schoolteacher-appearing woman) told me that she was getting to be just like G. because she'd been to the mall and was sitting on a bench knitting when this good-looking gentleman sat down beside her and struck up a conversation. J. needed to get some more yarn for knitting, so she bent down and reached into her sack. When she bent, her butt went up and blasted the charming gentleman.
He turned a little green, got up, and walked away.
So, I wrote a poem about her, and she enjoyed it, too.
Both of these poems were written in the mid-1980s. The first one was written in 1985, and the second one was written a year or so later. They've been hits ever since I wrote them.
Now, I won't mention any names, but one of their great-nephews is a Hollywood hunk. I don't know if he took after his great-aunts or not in that department, but I can say this much. Even before his name became familiar, his two great-aunts were already celebrities because of their toot-power! LOL
What a way to gain fame!!!
WOW! One of the songs that reminds me of Russell is playing on the radio now. I hope it won't be long before we're on speaking terms again.
I'm going to sign off with a funny joke I found in my e-mail a short time ago. Somehow, I think you'll also find it funny...
Bubba liked to frequent the old swimming hole but was never able to attract the girls.
He decided to ask his friend Billy-Bob for advice.
"It's those big baggy swimming trunks that make you look like an old fool..
They're years outta style. Your best bet is to grab yourself a pair of Speedos, about two sizes too little, and drop a fist-sized tater down inside them. I'm telling ya man...you'll have all the babes you want!"
The following weekend, Bubba hits the swimming hole with his spanking new tight Speedos, and his fist-sized potato.
Everybody at the swimming hole was disgusted as he walked by, covering their faces, turning away, laughing, looking sick!
Bubba went back to his buddy Billy-Bob and asked him, "What's wrong now?"
"Lard-Almighty Bubba!" said Billy-Bob, "the tater goes in the front!"Once again constipated due to pain meds and something happened today which has never happened before...did a poo and no toilet paper!
The last two days I have wanted to poo but could only produce one average length turd (one per day) that was very thin (snake like) but very hard and dry.
Got up before dawn and took my laxative which is a bit like mag citrate. Went straight to the gym and needed to go and had a quick sit but only passed a couple of small hard pebbles. After training I had a shower and shave and during getting dressed the urge hit very hard...I then jumped on the scales to see my weight before and after. I ran into the toilet and threw myself onto the seat and gushed out a torrent of runny poo and butt piss whith hard lumps quickly ejected and a few farts for good measure...I then looked and no toilet paper...this is unheard of at the gym because it is stocked every day...so upon finishing I had to pull up my pants 9 & undies) and scurry to the next toilet to wipe but unfortunately there were a few shit spots on my undies...I washed then when I got home....not to bad.
i weighed myself straight after and passed 0.45 kg or just over a pound of crap. Upon getting home I had another crap....soon after getting to work I had another crap and i feel another knocking at the back door.
THUNDER FROM DOWN UNDERBethany
i was listening to something by george carlin (dead comedian) and he said it's impossible to sneeze while peeing. which brought me to question.. i can't sneeze on command, but if anyone has sneezed while pissing, tell me? i'm really curious now!
B E T H A N YCONSTIPATED GIRL
Keith D: wow thats an interesting story. I've never seen a pile left on the ground by someone else, but I did notice, that while the house I am living in was being built, there was a port-o- potty.
well, there workers there apparently all used it to take dumps, because it was FULL of poop.
I had to use it one time to have a BM, and I noticed that when it dropped, there was no splash, because it landed on all the other poop!
Lisa: omg! I'm sorry to hear about that. Back when I was in the 7th grade, i believe. I went to school feeling fine, and then suddenly, I felt really sick, like i had the sh!ts. I had a test that day, and it was in my last class of the day. So i asked my teacher if I could go to the restroom, and she said I had to wait to take the test. I felt soo bad, so I had to "christmas tree" the test, so that i would have enough time to run to the bathroom.
I raised my hand after the test, and then ran to the bathroom, and sat on the toilet, and i basically filled the toilet with crap. I've never had such bad diarrhea in my life!
What embarrassed me, was when other kids were walking into the bathroom, and complaining about the smell. So, I just decided to wait until everyone left the bathroom, so I didn't have to do the "walk of shame" lol
Debbie: great story! was the really her???
oh I have to go now, but I'll post back later : )PIXIE
Keith D: lol, yes, the width of a coke can. it may sound large, but a lot of people have BMs that size.
And if you had a BM that size, you'd probably realize that its not that big.
I guess the reason why my BMs are so large is because I consume a lot of dairy.
Graham: yes, I also like taking pics of m self, or filming me when I'm pooping, lol.
Its not dirty or anything.... I just like watching myself take dumps : )
Mr.Clogs: Actually, I don't really care for interesting ways of peeing. haha, I don't know why, but i only like to poop in unique ways, lol
HERES MY NEWEST STORY:
ok, now this seriously happened 2 days ago. I'm not just making this up for a good story.
My water pump outside got messed up so, for two days, I didn't have any water.
I, of course, had to take a BM really badly. So I grabbed a Vitamin water bottle out of the fridge, and empied it into a plastic cup, and placed it back in the fridge (just so i wouldn't have to waste the Vitamin water)
I took the empty Vitamin Water container into my room, and placed it, cap-off, on my floor.
I kinda sat with the container in between my cheeks, so that i could easily poop into the bottle.
I was leaning comfortably up against a wall, so that i wouldn't have to balance myself while i was pooping.
so, I started to push out my log. the crackling noise was a little louder than normal, which made me enjoy my session even more. Then, my poop broke off and hit the bottom of the bottle. This 6 and a half inch turd was leaning against the side of the bottle, as my 2nd poop started to emerge. For some reason, this one was having trouble leaving my anus after about 2 inches of emerging.
I strained for about 10 seconds, and could feel it slowly moving some more. this turd wasn't crackling as loud : (
It fell out about 15 seconds later, and then i was finished. The second turd was about four inches, and both pieces were about an inch thick.
I put the cap back on the bottle, and then placed it out by the trash cans
: P
I wonder what the garbage people are going to think!
Hahalisa
The master cleanse is killing me.
I am currently on day 4! and these past few days have been causing me to feel like garbage! I really want to give up.
Everywhere I go I end up pooping there. I have a dentist appointment and I already know I am going to have to stop it to use the washroom.
I want this to be over .. .AND I am feeling like I am going to have to poop right now..
Until next timeBlissey
I had the worst bout of diarrhea/vomiting last night (and this morning)--in front of my friend (who's a girl).
Last night's bout of diarrhea: I had eaten a whole bunch of junk with her the night before at her house, i.e. pizza, candy, cookies, chips, you name it. I woke up at about 2:00 AM, holding my stomach and moaning. My friend woke up, heard me and asked me if I should be helped to the bathroom. I told her yes, cuz I was feeling nauseous. She helped me out of my bed (she was in a sleeping bag on the floor), and walked with me to the bathroom. Before I even sat on the toilet, I erupted with loud, smelly farts. I pulled up my nightshirt, pulled down my underwear, plunked my ass on the toilet and clutched my stomach. My friend rubbed my back, as I farted loudly and groaned. I doubled over with another cramp as a huge gush of mushy poop plopped in the toilet. I felt the need to throw up also. I told my friend that I had to throw up, and for her to get the trashcan. The minute she got the trashcan, I barfed up something nasty into it twice. Another wave of liquid poop blasted out of me, as my friend held my hand. I squeezed my friend's hand as some more soft serve mush came out into the toilet. I had a few more waves of diarrhea, and my friend volunteered to wipe my bottom (she rocks). The toilet was full of brownish green mush. It smelled horrible. My stomach still hurt, but I thought nothing of it and finally went to sleep.
This morning's bout of diarrhea: I said I was sorry to my friend after last night's episode of diarrhea and throwing up. She said it was okay, and that it happens to everyone. I've seen her have diarrhea and I've seen her throw up, and I've definitely helped her through it. I've wiped her bottom before, too. This morning, though, I still felt a little queasy, though, so she told me to wait in her room. She came back with this pink stuff (which tasted freakin' nasty) and told me to lie on my belly after taking it. I got a bad cramp, slowly got up off the floor, and ran for the toilet. I didn't make it, and I had really nasty diarrhea in my panties--and threw up all of that pink stuff all over the hardwood floor. My friend got her mom, who called my mother to pick me up. Her mother cleaned up the mess, as my friend helped me with the mess in my underpants. I took my underwear off, my friend put them in the sink with some soap and water, and I sat on the potty. I had really bad liquid poo coming out of me, it was burning my anus, like it was on fire. I was crying so hard. My stomach was protruding and bloated and it hurt so bad. My friend came over, as she rubbed my stomach. I grunted as a soft but HUGE turd (which burned my butthole) plopped into the potty on top of the diarrhea. It didn't even splash. My friend wiped my ass, and the bowl was nearly filled to the brim with green shit. My mom was outside the bathroom with my backpack. She carried me out the door, underwearless, and sat me on a towel in the car, in case I were to have another diarrhea attack on the way home.
Right now, I am in my bed, vaguely awake from a nap. My stomach feels a little better, but I may have to poo again soon.
I'll see you guys later.
Happy Pooping and Peeing.
-Blissey
Fluidity
This afternoon about 1:45PM I was sitting in the lobby of a small "art house" movie theater. Outside there was road work going on with a half dozen or more workers all wearing hard hats and yellow vests with red reflective patches. They all had a belt with "gear" hanging from it. I had purchased my ticket and was sitting in the small lobby waiting for the next showing of my movie. Suddenly one of the workers burst into the lobby. She was an attractive Black woman, not petite but well stacked, and she was in a hurry to get to the toilet. She was walking quickly in jeans and a tight pullover with her thighs kept tightly together. Her tools hanging from her belt jangled as she walked. I can only imagine what she let rip when she got to the women's room (I'm guessing a quart or more of hot piss). When she left I watched her; she glanced at me and gave me a brief half-smile as if she was admitting that she was feeling much better now, and she knew that I knew it, too.
FluDan Boy
Debbie, if your story is about who I think it's about...I don't know what to say. It gets me pretty excited just picturing it in my head, much less being in the situation you found yourself in. I have to admit, I'm pretty jealous. It's too bad she wasn't feeling well, poor girl. But like you said, we're all human. Everyone, from the most famous and hottest people to the ugliest and lowliest of beings, has to poop, pee, fart, and burp just the same.
Short but funny story. Me, my buddy and his gf were hanging out at his parents' house on sunday because he had to house-sit for them while they're away for a week and a half. His gf (who I've been friends with since years before they hooked up) is one of the hottest girls I have ever seen other than famous ones. 5'5", blonde, big chest, big round butt, very cute face, and is a dancer so she has an incredible body. We're all sitting in the family room trying out Rock Band for Wii (amazing game, btw) and his gf gets up and excuses herself to the bathroom. The bathroom is literally 5 feet from where we're sitting and we can hear her peeing as if the door wasn't even there. Next thing we hear is a "BOOOF SSSSSSbrrraaat......SCPLUNK SCPLUNK....(sigh)....plop-KERPLONK" Me and my buddy are almost crying from trying not to burst out laughing. It actually hurt not to laugh. But as soon as she came out and sat back on the couch, she could tell we heard her because both of us were beat red, crying, and not even daring to look anywhere near her. She was like, "Oh my GOD! Could you hear me?" And with that, it was all over, we couldn't stop laughing for a good 10 minutes. She got red in the face, but she doesn't get embarressed easily and she took it pretty well, even laughing at herself saying it was the burgers I grilled that made her have to go like that.To Bethany-
I give you the following advice as a mother:
You need to visit the bathroom when you feel the urge. I understand it's not always convenient to go, but being embarrassed about going to the bathroom twice in a short period is no excuse. Your parents will not think a thing of it - i know my kids have done it.
Putting off a poop or a pee is never a good idea. Holding will eventually lead to an accident - my oldest daughter had a full accident in her pants at 18 from waiting to long, most likely for the same reason as you - she was embarrassed about something.
Just relax, and use the toilet when ever you need it.Bethany
to Multi-drop Pete:
you have a good point and it makes me feel slightly better but, see, i pay attention to others' toilet habits and have for a while, and for some reason i have this firm belief that my parents do the same. not just to me - to guests, to everyone.
on another note, i ate a lot of meat today. 'nuff said.nate
anytips on potty training a 5 year old ?
any tips for potty training a girl ?
Sita
To Julia: Julia I have same constipation problem as you. I have small feeling inside I need to sit on toilet but when I sit nothing come out. Also I like poo to come out on its own and I don't like pushing. It very frustrating when bum doesn't work. So I sometimes have to go at school after several days and I don't like it much because other girls hear me trying to poo and it sometimes take a very long time and I don't want them to know I have constipation. I also hold my poo in a lot so I don't have to go at school and I try to hold it until I get home. Also I hold it in a lot so when I sit on toilet I know poo will come out. It sometimes start coming out as soon as I sit and it come out nicely and not hurt and I only sit for a few seconds. But sometimes my poo is very large and hard and make my bum hole open so wide and it hurt very very bad and I try and squeeze my bum hole to make poo smaller. So what happen is tip of poo come out until it so big it hurt and make me cry out. Then I squeeze bum hole as hard as I can to try and make poo smaller and it go back inside my bum. Then after little while tip come out again and same thing happen all over. This is very difficult painful poo and sometimes it take 15 or 20 minutes before it finally come out of my bum.
To C Guy: I don't like doing poop at school or in public restrooms because sometimes my poo is very painful and I make noise when my bum hole hurts very bad. I don't want everyone to know I am doing difficult poo. Sometimes I have to go poo there because I cant hold it in any longer.Eek, my poop is stuck in the toilet. It's been there for 2 days, what do i do to make it go down
Eva
Why does my shit stink? thank you for give me answer
The Nature Boy
lisa - sorry, but I LOLed picturing the part in your story where you told the guy there was no door and he just said "....I know."
Hmmm....on one hand I would say that he must not be one of "us" (as in someone that enjoys being around the opposite sex while in the bathroom). But then again, maybe he didn't want to offer to hang around for fear of you thinking he was a pervo. But he was happy that you wanted him to? Hmmm.
Or for that matter, maybe he was busy. I often have to unlock the bathrooms for customers - often attractive female customers in various states of urgency - but I don't take time to dwell on it much at work.
I guess since I'm around so damn MANY women that aren't too ashamed to talk about their bathroom habits, I've gotten to where it don't "distract" me much. On that note, I feel like I really need to post some stories - though I don't have anything really *good* to post...
Anyway - this may not be true for all such products (like I don't think those Kinoki foot pads would give you the shits) but ANYTHING along the lines of a 'detox' or 'miracle diet' I would be wary of for massive laxative effects. Ah well, live and learn huh?
Blissey - ouch! I LOVE Hardee's Philly Cheesesteak Thickburgers, but the last one I ate gave me some seriously burning diarrhea like that - and I haven't been able to touch one since...Bob from Chicago
Cally, when I was a boy, I lived in Georgia and had a good sized wooded area nearby with a small creek. We did the same thing. We would watch each other poop in the woods. Even when we were at home, we preferred to go to the woods to poop LOL. I was around 9 and some of the bigger boys were around 12. The most memorable one was my friend having to poop really bad and doing it bending over on a log over the creek with 3 of us as an audience. A big yellow log shot out like a bullet making a smooth "bloop" entry into the water. He later told me he was sooo close to doing it in his pants.
Pee Shy
Hi Mikey Pee,
You are the first one here as far as I can remember to describe in stories what happens when you have a shy bladder or stage fright or paruresis, the medical and psychological term for guys and I guess some girls who can't ever empty their bladders when anyone is around.
Since I was 13 and in middle school, usually I can't piss in any public bathroom. I wonder if you can remember the first time it happened to you when your bladder locks up and you can't go no matter what. I remember having no problem emptying my bursting bladder until I got to a new school. I was in the 7th grade. I hadn't peed since I got up that morning. I held it through the 4th period, then ate my lunch, and at about 12:30 (5 hours since my morning pee) I finally got to the boy's room. It had about 6 urinals and 5 stalls. The stalls were full. But at the urinal there was one boy who was in my class standing at urinal number 1 and pissing away. I walked to the other end and started to pee. He said:
"Hi. Isn't it good to piss when you have been holding it so long. Would you believe that my sisters occupied our one bathroom this morning when I had to go bad. They wouldn't let me in. They take a later bus to their school. My bus was coming down the street. I ran out with a full bladder. When I got to school, the bathrooms were locked. So I was forced to go to my first class without peeing." I said: "I haven't gone in 5 hours." He said: "Well I am peeing out 13 hours of pee. I was dying to go. I hadn't emptied my bladder since last night when I went to bed."
His story was turning me on. I got hard. That cut off my pee. I can't pee through my erection. (My friend was still peeing.) So with a half full bladder I went to 5th period. By the end of 7th period, I was desperate to go again. I had five minutes before my bus took off. I ran into the boy's room. Three urinals were being used by some 9th graders.
I took the middle urinal. The urinals in that school were the toilet kind attached to the floor. They didn't give you any privacy. The guy next to be kept looking at my penis. He said, "I"m glad you're circumcised. We don't like uncircumcised guys in this school. But why aren't you peeing? You got stage fright or something?"
I don't like people looking at my penis when I pee. I locked up. I couldn't go at all. He said: "That is hilarious. You can't go."
So I got on the bus and finally was able to go in my bathroom at home. I was in pain when I got there. I thought my bladder would explode. After that sometimes I could go but the bashful bladder thing kept coming back. By the time I was in high school, I gave up trying to go with other guys there.
So I used to hold it from 7:30 in the morning until about 4 in the afternoon. My bladder was getting bigger. But it still hurt from after lunch on.
That's my first story. I have many more. How about you? Tell us some more. I am sure there are others who suffer from bursting bladders that you can't empty. Any girls with bashful bladders? Other guys? Tell us your story. It will help other people.
I am now in college age 20 and still having to try different men's rooms on the campus where I can pee in private. What a nuisance.
Pooperazzi
To Cally: You asked if anyone else watches others pee and poop. I posted a week or so back about pooping in a friends house he was renovating and he watched me. In fact we have known each other since we were about 5 years old and watched each other pee and poop quite a bit. I think it started because Tony, his sister Angela, who was about a year younger and me played together all the time, and frankly none of us wanted our valuable play time interrupted by toilet needs. We never hesitated to pee in front of each other. One of us would just announce they needed to pee and usually do it right there. Tony or me would just pull our cocks out and shoot. I remember we usually played around spraying it all over and seeing who could shoot furthest. It was great fun.. Angela of course couldn't join in that fun, she would just pull her panties down, bend over and pee.
The first time I ever saw anyone poop was Angela and she must have been 7 or 8 then, and I was about 8 or 9. She announced she had to go bathroom. That was weird to start with because she always used the word "pee". Tony obviously knew what she meant because they started arguing about where to go. Tony was saying go right here but I remember Angela wasn't too comfortable with that. Tony eventually came up with something like "Go on, do it…..if you poop your pants moms gonna be mad" At that Angela looked around, bent over and pulled her dress right up over her back. She pulled her panties down to her knees but she didn't squat like she normally did when she peed. Even then I had an insatiable curiosity about peoples privates and bodily functions and I couldn't resist walking around behind her to see her bare butt. To my total astonishment I could see her hole and already emerging was the head of a turd. It was thin, and came out fairly quickly. I remember it made it a long way towards the ground before it broke off and fell out of her hole. Immediately another long thin snake of pooh started coming out and this also made it almost half way to the ground before breaking off. What happened next I can remember as if it were yesterday. Her hole started winking in and out and she started grunting. At the first wink another very small turd popped out and after another 3 or 4 winks she relaxed and had obviously finished.
After that all three of us regularly pooped while the other two watched. I often think about those times and wish I could go back.
To Anonymous: To answer your question, Does anyone else's need to pee intensify if they are also holding in a poo? Mine certainly does and in fact it works both ways. Most times my feeling of needing to poo starts very mildly and many times, probably the majority of times, I soon also feel the need to pee. I also love to hold my poo in, and I learned a long time ago that if my poo urge isn't too strong I can relax enough to pee without risking my poo coming out. I always find that after I have peed, my poo urge goes away completely for quite a while. The interesting thing is that when I'm holding in a poo and I need to pee, I don't pee my usual amount, it's always far less. Also, when my poo does eventually come out, I always seem to pee, even if I had no great urge to pee before.
I loved reading about your accident. I have had the opposite happen to me on quite a few occasions. I have been holding my poo in for quite a long while and at the same time ignoring my need to pee. This usually happens in the mall when I use the public restrooms. I relax to pee and a huge turtle head starts forcing its way out of my anus. Its very difficult to stop both peeing and pooping while standing there but I have done it on many occasions. I've had many looks from other guys as I have abandoned the urinal and hobbled as fast as I could into one of the stalls, making it pretty obvious to onlookers that I've probably started filling my underpants. And yes I have left some very severe stains in my underpants.Richard
Wow Debbie, I really enjoyed reading your post about you taking a shit at the shopping mall in Nashville. And at the same time being able to hear former American Idol winner and country singing star Carrie Underwood having a real bad bowel movement.
And if I had to guess, those are probably typical bowel movements for her. As being so famous and having to watch what you eat and proper exercise and all the travel and performances she does.
Hope to get more from you, or from others if you ever see a famous star in a public rest room.
You were so right too Deb. She's only human and we all have to shit.
Kathy
Hi Sis, I just read your post. You really had some major problems with getting that first poop out of your system after we left. In all of our years together growing up or whenever we talked. I had to agree with what you said. That you never had a poop like this give you so much trouble. Wish you would have called me and we could have talked on the phone while you sat on the toilet Monday, Tuesday, or even that miserable Wednesday evening when you finally decided that you were going to poop, no matter what it took.
Well I was happy to read your post and knowing that you finally succeeded in getting everything out. Sue actually saw it before I did and called me to read your about your misery and pain.
As for me, we were definitely on different ends. While catching up on my mail Sunday evening after getting home. I was sitting in the family room with some comfy clothes on when I started to get a funny feeling in my t???y and below. It was something that I could ever recall happening in the past. Thinking that it would go away and that I was probably just overtired from the fun we had that week. I just continued to go through the mail. Basically all junk mail.
It seemed though like the pressure was continuing to build. I finally thought that well just maybe I do need to poop. So off to my bathroom I headed. I really didn't feel like reading though, which as you know is quite normal. Lowering my shorts and placing my ass on the toilet seat. I immediately PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTT, PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTT, PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT,let out a long stream of wet sounding gas. So I prepared for a good evening shit. Very unusual for me on a Sunday evening. I thought that maybe I should remove my shorts and thong and copy you and grab my mirror so as to watch my anal exit open up. Getting into position my right foot up and mirror placed, I pushed and........................................FFFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLMMMMMMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPPPP, FFFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH, FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLLLMMMMMMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPPPPPP, FFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPPPPP, FFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, I totally splattered all over my toilet. Seat, bowl, etc. Thankfully most of it found its way into the bowl. I never would have expected this to happen but it did. And it was a very strong and odorous smell to it. I knew that more was coming as well. I even noticed poop on my foot that was placed on the seat. I took some toilet paper and cleaned off my foot and then decided that maybe I should sit correctly on the toilet in case this next round is the same. However, I would have to sit on a messy brown toilet seat. I didn't want to take a chance of getting up off the toilet and as I clean it, I blast another load, or couldn't get seated again in time.
And I was right. Assuming the position I immediately FFFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, FFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH, FFFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLLMMMMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP, let out another wet runny load of diarrhea. Mind you nothing large or solid, just small liquid chunks. My exit hole wasn't even opening that wide. But the stool coming out was very hot feeling. Maybe I had a slight fever and didn't realize it. Ooops, FFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLMMMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPPPP, FFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPP, FFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLMMMMMMMMMPPPP, another bowl filling. Maybe this was just from all of the fun during the week, that the three of us had. running around, staying up late, new adventures. Sue and myself really had a great time in Michigan and it is a very nice area. Hold on....................FFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLLGGGGGGGGGGHHHH, FFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH, FFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLGGGGGGGGHHHH. I think our next visit there will also take us up north. Karen says it is very nice and peaceful up there. Just to bad to know how bad the economy is in the state. I was starting to now feel relaxed as I think my poop was just about all out of me. Looking into the bowl there was quite a bit. Varied colors as well. The smell was what was really nauseating. I never thought I could make myself smell that bad. I definitely was going to have to spray the room upon finishing.
Grabbing toilet paper off the roll, I stood up to wipe my rear end. Knowing that I was not going to be able to reach between my legs to wipe my cheeks I reached around the side. I really did a messy job on myself and then having to sit in it for about 10 minutes was not to comforting. Wiping both my left and right cheeks, I was then able to reach between my legs and clean off my anal exit. Fortunately nothing had run onto my vaginal area. I was quite messy though between the cheeks however. Slowly moving around my anus so as not to spread it. I wiped a good messy amount of liquid poop. And this went on for about seven wipes.
I was now finally able to flush everything down. And I felt much, much better. But the fun was just beginning as I now had clean up my toilet and floor. Something I always wanted to do on a quiet Sunday evening.
Oh well, that was my choice. Bye for now.
Veronika
Keith... I guess one of the problems with the orthographic as opposed to the spoken word, is that a certain element of tongue-in-cheek often goes unchecked. The turn of phrase 'political reeducation' was one often used with reference to the state's answer to anything ranging from subversive activity to picking one's nose in public.
The 'underwear inspection' your friend mentioned that allegedly went on in that former Soviet satellite state resonates with a similar ring; you'd be forgiven for believing anything that sounds even remotely unusual from that part of the world. Even I could be persuaded to accept it! (It makes the school I attended in Praha - Jihiro z podebrady - sound rather lame by comparison.)
I'm glad to hear that you miss your former partner for more than just sharing a toilet space together. The relationship with my ex had nothing at all to do with this topic. I never once mentioned my interests to him, and it was certainly for the better. Some things should remain out of reach, even to those closest to us.
Mona,
That 'sweet relief' is like nothing else in the world. Do you find smoking and reading on the toilet helps move things along in a more 'expedient' manner? Whilst it's one of my few bad habits, smoking whilst pooping is one of those little indulgences that I allow myself.
Jenny,
Aside from being interrupted whilst pooping and men leaving the toilet seat up, the thing that outrages me the most is when they leave the bloody thing down, and pee on it!
C guy:
Whilst I generally tend to avoid most public restroom facilities, there is a park nearby to where I live with toilet amenities of an unusually high standard of cleanliness. One day I may just part with tradition and submit a detailed report of the activity within its hallowed walls!
Debbie:
I extend the offer that I made to C guy. The next time I'm on the toilet at work or wherever, and an interesting scenario arrises regarding other women pooping within earshot, I'll provide all the details.
Glenn -
Like you, I'm at a loss as to why people seemingly find it appropriate to leave their unflushed deposits for all to see. This must be a particularly vexing situation for someone in your line of work.
Hi Julia...
It sounds like false modesty to me... your English is impeccable. (It took me some time before I felt comfortable communicating in English.)Hi Debbie,
Yes, I aswell am very interested in the sounds that the ladies in the next stall make when pooping. That was a fabulous story of yours about C.U. Loved to have been a fly on the wall! Anyhow, I do pretty much the same thing when I am out and about. When I have to go to the ladies room, I am always hopefull that I will hear another lady pooping. You mentioned that you like hearing the sounds of other ladies pooping, in particular what sounds do you like to hear? The straining, grunting, plopping farting or what? For me, I love to listen when she is constipated, and/or just having a hard time going. I love it when she grunts, and even if she is trying to stiffle the sounds, therefore exhaling hard after she has been bearing down. And there is nothing like a huge splash at the end of it all after she finally succeeds. Sometimes, if we are both just sitting there in silence, I wonder if she wants to push hard, but is self concious and doesn't want me to hear. In these cases, if I am also trying to poo, I just make my gunting sounds quite audible, in the hope that she will feel more comfortable doing the same. This has worked several times. I have lots of stories to share, some constipation, some diarreah, and some just normal poops. If you are keen, I will share a couple of them next time.A.W
Hey Cute & Shy, if you're still around lurking on here. Please come back with another accident or near accident story again. It's been a year since we last heard from you. I miss you a lot!
Korrie
to Bekka:
I'm so sorry to hear about your accident, especially on the last day of school. That really sucks. However, you talk about Melissa teasing you sometimes about how many other students might have sat on a toilet seat before you do. Then you say you might wipe the seat off before sitting on it. But apparently Melissa just sits right down without wiping it off first? This seems inconsistent. I do agree with your statement that you get some satisfaction out of putting the seat down for the first time each morning at 7:15 and knowing that a couple hundred other skanks haven't made messes on it. Being 15 years older than you, I now have a daughter of my own. She's 9. When using public bathrooms I don't like to overburden her with rules and hassles, but cleanliness is an issue. There seems to be so much inconsistency among her friends. I did tell on of her friends, who is 2 years younger, that she should not be sitting in urine on toilet seats at the mall. That just grosses me out!!!!