Hi everyone, I am here again like I said I would be with another one of my pooping experiences. And that is exactly what it was. One very good poop at the mall.

I would first like to congratulate Rachelle on her opening herself up to others while sitting in a public rest room. To shit, and keep the door open for others to not only hear her and smell her. But for all of the other women that she let see her while she shit her load.

As for me, my day started off getting up early to get to the mall and continue with my Christmas shopping. I wasn't of course up early like on Black Friday at 4:00am. But I was in the mall by 9:00am. I always like to get started early, before the stores get crowded and to get as much done as I can while they are slow. I didn't have any urge to take a shit while I was at home getting ready. So, I didn't go. I probably could have if I sat on the toilet and did some straining. But I like to go when I get the urge and feeling that my back door indeed has to open up for evacuation. I also drove to the mall, with no feelings of having to go. I just drove along and sipped on my Starbuck's coffee, while listening to the radio.

Getting to the mall, I immediately went to Nordstrom's to do some shopping. A store that has always been one of my favorites. I picked out a few outfits for my niece. And a couple of blouses for my sister. While at the register letting the clerk ring everything up and package it along with the boxes. I started getting the feeling that something had to come out of my ass. It wasn't uncomfortable. It didn't feel like anything but a real nice normal shit. Which to me is solid but soft poop that comes from your bowels. But, I thought what the heck now is a good time to head for the ladies room. So, I just went to the one at Nordstrom, which is always clean, shiny, and immaculate. They are not to big. I think maybe five stalls. The sinks and mirrors are right across from the stalls. As I entered, there was one lady fixing her hair and make up. I think she was just arriving for work. And there was one lady who just sat down in one of the stalls. All she did though was pee. So she was in and out real quick.

I was tempted to try the Rachelle way by keeping the door open. But, I couldn't quite do it yet. I don't think I am to that point. Maybe if the rest room was empty, I could have done it. But with somebody else in there by the mirror I couldn't bring myself too.

So, I just closed the stall. Put my packages on the floor and hung my coat on the hook. As I lowered my jeans and panties I could feel some gas ready to be released from my bowels. As soon as I sat down, I did do some farting. It was quite audible, but just normal farting. It wasn't that wet, and mushy sound of gas that you release. I could tell by the lady shuffling her feet as she stood in front of the mirror that she must have turned and looked in my direction. After a few more seconds of sitting. I again let out a stream of farts, just like the first. It seemed like it was just going to be a very solid shit that was going to exit my bowels and ass. I then started straining and pushing. Not real hard, just enough to help it along. During that time two girls entered the rest room. The one girl said, "Oh Melissa, I am almost ready to pee my pants, I have to go so bad." And it must have been Melissa who replied by saying, "Lucky you, I know that I have to take a really good dump." I don't think they were aware that I was in there. They sat side by side in seperate stalls. The one girl did start peeing. And pee she did. She went on for what sounded like it lasted three minutes. Even though I know it didn't. Melissa on the other hand told her friend that she could wait outside if she wanted too. I think thats what she wanted so her friend couldn't hear her go. But she told her she would keep company and lean against the counter with the sinks so they could talk. Melissa replied, "Are you sure." Again she said don't worry, I can wait in here and talk with you. With that Melissa just let out one loud thundering load of crap. Her friend said to her that "you really do have to dump, don't you." Melissa could only reply, "yep, and my t???y is really hurting."

Still thinking that they were alone as I was at the far end stall while Melissa I think was in the first one. I knew it was now time for my bowels to open up. Like I said, I thought that it was going to be a regular solid but soft stool. When all of a sudden my anus just opened like flood gates and I sat there for like 10 seconds with nothing but a load of diarrhea coming out of me. I even started pushing which seemed to make it louder as I wanted to get it out. I was quite surprised. Because my t???y wasn't churning or gurgling. And my farting was just solid and normal. Melissa, then said to her girl friend, "Bailey, is that you sitting and shitting like that." Bailey replied, "No there is somebody else in here also." I could tell they were surprised. As soon as she said that Melissa let out another load of soft-serve. I couldn't really tell how bad Melissa was smelling. But down at my end I was really stinky. I to let out another really wet load of soft-serve. I couldn't think what brought that on. I did have Chinese food for dinner last night. And Chinese food has never done that to me before. And it was even Almond Boneless Chicken, which I always get. And from the same restaurant. I now let out a few really good wet farts, and knew by the feel that I would have one more load to get rid of. And it was coming mighty fast. While Melissa farted for awhile, my load of wet mushy shit blew my back door open. The smell of my shit in the bowl and on my ass was one of the grossest that I could ever remember coming out of me. But I knew I was finished. Folding the toilet paper and leaning over on my left cheek, I went directly to the hole to get off what was there before going front to back like I always do. And a stinky load of shit on my ass I did have. It even got on my finger tips. While I wiped Melissa farted and shit some more. Bailey asked her if she was going to be okay. And Melissa told her she would be, and this was because she didn't go yesterday. It was finally after the sixth wipe that I reached into my purse for some Handi Wipes to clean my anus and around the area really good. I didn't want to start itching back there as I finished shopping.

After standing up and looking into the bowl at my work. I flushed it away. It actually took two flushes to clear the bowl out. Grabbing my packages and coat, I exited the stall to wash my hands. I also apologized to Bailey for my happening, since I know neither one knew I was there already on the toilet when they entered. Melissa was still doing a little bit of farting and shitting, while I finished drying my hands. Knowing that I care about how clean I am down there. After I put my coat on I reached into my purse and grabbed another one of my small packages of Handi Wipes and told Bailey to hand these to her friend. Melissa did hear me say that and actually was kind enough in her position to thank me, as Bailey reached under the door to hand them to her. And yes, Melissa was stinking quite bad as well, when I walked by. Well thats it for now.

I hope to write again sometime soon. And maybe I can work on my issue of being very open and pooing the Rachelle way. Maybe I will have to let my sister or friend watch me to help build my confidence. Happy Holidays to all.

I made a mess in a stall in the bathroom at Macy's. I put two toilet paper seat covers on the toilet seat. (They were still folded in half). Then I hovered while peeing. The pee got on the toilet seat covers, then dripped onto the floor. I backed up further, but the pee kept going from the seat covers to the floor. I tried to clean up the seat covers on the toilet seat... I pushed the wet seat covers with one of my shoes. I tried to push the wet toilet seat covers into the toilet; but the toilet seat covers just broke apart. I flushed the toilet and left.

I went back to that same stall a couple of hours later; and it had been cleaned up. I arranged the toilet seat covers a different way this time. I took one seat cover and put it on one side of the toilet. I took another toilet seat cover and put it on the other side of the toilet. I took a third toilet seat cover and tore it in half. I put one half of it on top of the seat cover on the left side of the toilet, and the other half of it over the seat cover on the right side of the toilet. That's so I'm not sitting directly on the toilet. One seat cover on each side of the toilet isn't enough to cover the toilet, because of the perforations in the seat covers.

Then I pooped very quickly. I flushed the toilet. I didn't make a mess.

bladder babe
during the cystoscopy they will put you out and the docotr will put a light in your bladder and then put salt water, like saline, in your bladder and keep putting in as mich as he can, thats why you have to be out because he is stretching it out and it is painful. you will wake up and may be in pain but ask for something for it and you will be fine. you will be able to hold more urine and the dr. will find out what is wrong.

i am 19 and have had this problem for almost 2 years. it was diagnosed 2 years ago but its been going on for quite some time.

Linda from Australia here again. This week Ive been doing the early shift at work and starting at 7am. I hate starting this early because I never have time to do a morning poo at home (I don't feel comfortable going at work) For the last 2 days, Ive gone to work and felt a big load sitting up my butt and several times throughout the day, I had the urge to do a poo. On the way home, I got the urge to go again and I couldn't wait to get on the toilet and drop my load. However, when I got on the toilet, the urge to do a poo went away completely and I couldn't go at all. So I didn't go at all yesterday and then today the same thing happened - I had the urge to go all day, I could feel big logs up there but they just wouldn't come out. Eventually, after eating some cereal, I managed to squeeze out my poos but they took some effort to get out. I haven't been eating much fibre lately so Im getting a bit bunged up. I like to go at least once per day and I hate it when I go all day without a poo and have to wait till the next day.

Does anyone here get butt phlegm when they are constipated?? A few months ago, I was a bit constipated, although I was going every day I was having lots of trouble pooping. I remember doing a poo in the morning before work one day and it took a long time to push the rock hard turds out (about 30 minutes). I wiped my bum properly after my poo and I had to wipe about 6 or 7 times as the last part of it was a bit mushy. When I went for a wee at work, I was horrified to find a small patch of poo in my knickers!! I wiped my butt and more poo was on the tp - as if I was wiping after doing a poo but I hadn't!! I had to wipe again to make sure I had wiped it all away. I haven't had this problem since then but I did get it a lot when I was a kid - I suffered with chronic constipation for about a year and I always had butt phlegm.

LTL from the U.S.
First, to Anny--You should look on the internet at health websites--a good one that I've used is ????, although I think the address has now changed to ????, but either one will work. They have a ton of information on symptoms, tests and treatments. Let me know if it works for you. Another thing too--don't be afraid to ask your doctor questions, either. That's what they're there for. Anyway, let me know what you find okay? Don't worry. As they say, this too, will pass.

Okay, now for my problem. As I've mentioned before in other posts from a LONG time ago, I usually don't have a problem crapping every day. But since Wednesday, things have been kinda weird. I went once (as usual) both Wednesday and Thursday, but it was only a couple little pebble pieces each day. Then Friday (yesterday) was normal. But then today, the same thing happened as Wed and Thurs, with like two pebbles. It was one of those times where you know there's more "up there" and you get the urge to push so bad, but it just doesn't move if you push, or it moves, and then slips back inside. Well, I knew I had more to get out, but I really hate pushing really hard, because it's just not good for your heart, blood pressure, you get hemmeroids,etc. So I hate lunch and drank some water, and then afterwards I got kinda gassy, and my hole was hurting from that damn stubborn shit that didn't want to come out. So I went to the bathroom again. This time--success without strain. Although my hole hurt like hell afterward. Wiping made my eyes almost water. But I feel much better.
I'm curious. What's the most difficult crapping session people have ever had?
Happy toileting to all!
And happy holidays, too!

petite pooper
to M&M: pooping for me feels really good too. I can't say more pleasurable then I'm a virgin, but it's definately a turn-on.

Anny, I'm so sorry to hear of your continuing difficulty.

As someone earlier mentioned, a narrow urethra
is simply a condition where your urine comes out very slowly; by itself it would not cause your
symptom of urinating frequently, but if you cut off the flow because "you have peed long enough" and there is
still urine in your bladder, it will take less time for your bladder to complain that it is full
again. The solution is to make sure you take all the time you need to let all your urine empty from
your bladder, even if it comes out very slowly.

If you need to have an exam inside your bladder rest assured that it will be much, much less painful
than for a male. I have had to be catheterized twice the past two years because my enlarged prostate
caused my urethra to be squeezed shut and I could not urinate. I had to go to the emergency room and wait
for the paperwork to be processed, all the time holding a bladder so filled with urine that it was
painful in the extreme --- not sharp cutting pain, but deep aching pain unlike anything else. The
actual insertion of the catheter was sharply painful for a few seconds but the relief of my bladder
emptying was blissful beyond measure.

Independent of all this a week or two ago I ate something that disagreed with me. Early one morning
I was awakened and felt like I needed to fart. When I tried to let the fart out I was shocked to
realize that poop was coming out, instead. I had to grab hold of my butt, jump out of bed and fly
to the bathroom hoping that the runny poop was held in my hand. Mostly it was but a few drops
fell on the rug. Uck!

Melissa, if you can wake up and skip your morning pee and hold your urine all day long, you have an
amazing large bladder and remarkable control over it. I'm sorry your limit was finally reached when
you got home and you had your accident. If your Mother only knew just how much you can hold she
would be amazed ... unless she perhaps has the same ability. Do you know if she can go long, long
periods of time without needing a pee?


It's been a while since I've posted, so I'll post a brief recap of my personality: I live in a small cabin near the woods, and as such don't have a toilet in the house. Whenever I need to pee or poo, I just go outside and go.

Seeing as it's winter right now, I find myself unable to poo or pee outside due to the extreme cold. I set up a makeshift outhouse for during the winter months. It's not much, but better than exposing my butt to the cold wind.

My current poops have been fairly uneventful, but I'm reminded of one day many years ago... I was only 16 at the time, so this would have been 18 years ago.

My two friends and I were all cheerleaders at our high school and on this particular day, we were on the bus back from a football game. Before we piled onto the bus, we were told to use the bathroom. Lauren, Megan, and I went into the ladies room and had a nice pee, then got on the bus.

By halfway back to school, I was sort of regretting having not tried a little harder to poo - I had an urge to go and it was clear it wasn't going to go away. I'm honestly surprised I held it all in the whole way home.

Luckily for me, I wasn't alone. Both of my friends also struggled with the urge to poo. Once we arrived, barely holding on, every one else went to call their parents to go home, but we went into the bathroom and took the three stalls.

I pulled down my skirt and my panties and sat on the toilet. With a small push, a thick turd squirmed its way out. Several silent farts led directly to another thick turd that was also fairly long. One last smaller, but still thick turd shot out and I was done. I wiped and waited outside for the others to finish.

Lauren had a quick poo, as she was waiting for me when I came out, but Megan was still on the toilet, but she wasn't making any noises. Maybe 5 minutes later, she emerged looking very relieved. Seeing as we were the only three in the bathroom, we decided to look at each others poops.

Lauren's poop was several thin, but long turds curled up in the bowl. When I went to look at Megan's poop, I understood why she took so long. She had two turds, a little thicker than mine were, but hers must have been two feet long each.

Whoever told you that cute cheerleader babes don't poop obviously never met my friend Megan. :)

Hope you all enjoyed my story. I'm just a little bummed out that I haven't seen Megan since high school graduation. The three of us went to different colleges, and since then we only talk on the phone about once a month or so.

Mark C

For all you women out there reading. Why is it women cannot hold their pee for very long?

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Ughhh!!! I hate this bladder problem! It only burned once, yesterday morning to pee but I think it was my thong or something chafing me that caused irritation as it didn't hurt anymore when I went multiple times during the rest of the day.

Today I have to call into the doctors office and ask for my urine test results, with luck hopefully they wouldn't have lost my urine again! I quite literally filled the cup full of urine on Monday, and soon after my bladder quickly refilled.

I always pee large amounts but my bladder quickly refills again and I need to go again...and again, and get my drift. It is quite annoying and I'm really tired of this problem. I hope they can fix this and give me my life back because it's making me miserable.

My doctor thinks it's perhaps a narrow urethra. What is that? Could anyone tell me please? Need a bit more info.

To Lisa: My pevic-abdomen ultrasound test is tomorrow(Thursday) at 10:30 am. I already have a 1L bottle ready to fill with water, which I have to drink the entire thing before 9:30 am. I just hope I don't pee myself with all that pressing and pressure on my stomach and bladder. Will let you know how it goes.

To bladder babe: I'm glad to see others with the same problems on here because it makes me feel like I'm not alone. What do they do during the cystoscopy? And how do they stretch the bladder? I may soon need to go through this as well and I'm nervous about it hurting or causing internal damage. How old are you and how long have you had the similar problems? I'm sorry to hear about the similar bladder troubles you've had. I will definetly let you know what happens. Thank you for the support. Likewise if you need support or advice, I'm here too.

To Scooter: Sorry to hear about your runs from the pizza. Pizza is very evil for giving people diarrhea and unbearable cramps. I've had food poisoning a couple of times from it until my body flat-out because intolerant to it. Now I can't eat more than a slice or two otherwise I get wicked diarrhea.

To Donny: I liked your story about the chili-and-beer inflicted shit you took :D LOL. How did you not burn the inside of your stomach and rectum? That sounds like a hell of a formula for an explosion. But anyway, I enjoyed your story and am glad you're feeling better after your dump; I imagine you needed it!

Punk Rock Girl: Another great story from you! Keep up the pooping stories, I enjoy reading them.

Shane: Interesting story about your girlfriend peeing and shitting herself. Although I have to say that that was kind of gross to pee on the seat and kick the dirty panties under the seat. What a mess for the cleaning staff to clean up, but anyway. Good story nonetheless.

Here's another story from childhood:

When me and my friend were younger, she told me about the time when she was 10 when she peed her panties. She told me how her and her mom were playing around and her mom was tickling her and my friend(Sara) was laughing so hard she peed her underwear. The pee gushed out, soaking the bed, making her mom jump up and yell "Oh, Sara! You peed all over the bed!" So that was that. LOL.

Well, I gtg for now, but I will let you know of the results from my urine test, and let you know tomorrow how my ultrasound went. I hope it goes well.

The holiday season is coming, and that means more holiday poop stories :D hehe.

I like all kinds of bathroom stories, everything from intentionally peeing your pants to diarrhea stories, but I would like to see more intentional peeing-and-pooping pants stories if you have them :D

Have a great day everyone on The Toilet!

xo Anny

A couple weeks ago I was concerned that on top of my unpredictable bladder, I was having trouble with bowel control. I started to get a little freaked out when I pooped my pants at work... but now I've come to realize that was just a fluke.

I discussed this with a close friend of mine. She told me that an onset of bladder incontinence that calls for diaper usage will usually cause the wearer to relax their bathroom habits a little. I guess the logic behind this is that someone wearing a diaper has a safety net and isn't too vigilant about holding everything in. Basically, I knew I was wearing a diaper so if I were to poop my pants I'd be protected. I was less inclined to retain my bowels and they, well... just kinda slipped.

Personally, I don't think I buy this theory. Whenever I have to move my bowels I make sure I'm on top of things. I try to minimize my diaper usage the best i can, so if I can prevent an accident I will. If I feel I have to pee, and assuming I can get to the toilet before the unpredictable bladder contractions make me pee, I'll use the toilet.

What do you guys think? If you're wearing a diaper, do you let your guard down?

Lord X
OK, I've been browsing this page for a while, kind of amazed that so many people are willing to discuss their bodily functions online. I have a general question for anyone with an answer. I'm a 20 yr. old male and I've always been kind of curious about the relieving habits of the opposite sex. At first I thought it was a strange fascination but then as I read more I realized it isn't as uncommon as I originally assumed. I've actually never been in a serious relationship and I'd be interested in knowing how common it is for couples to observe each other on the toilet or relieving themselves elsewhere. Are most guys turned on by the thought of an attractive female relieving herself? Would anyone happen to know how common this interest is amongst males, like an estimated percentage of guys that will find this attractive? Thanks for any enlightenment you may be able to offer.

Linda from Australia here again. Yesterday I felt the urge to do a poo all day. I tried to go when I got home from work but nothing came out. I kept getting the urge to go but whenever I tried to go, the poo wouldn't budge. So I couldn't do a poo at all yesterday and all day today until about 5.30pm. Even when I did manage to go today, only a small amount came out. It wasn't hard to push out, infact, it shot out of my butt easily. I thought I had a nice load up there but I didn't. I was looking forward to taking a nice dump that stretched my anus a bit - maybe tomorrow.

Emily, please tell us your story! ;)

Mr. Clogs
Hello all hope all is well for ya'll. I've been good as far as taking a good crap in the mornings. Nice massive loads, must be from the cabbage I've been eating for the past couple of days, I love cabbage. So I keep eating my cabbage and stuff, maybe I'm going to have change my name to something, nahhh..... folks I'm just kidding. I've grown accustomed to this name why bother. Once of those massive dumps happened this morning, I managed to get to the bathroom at my job just in time before catching the company's shuttle to another site. I took a stall in the Men's room, cover the seat with the seat cover and some toilet paper for full coverage, unfastened my belt lowered my pants and black underwear and sat on the pot and begain unloading my crap into the toilet. Man did it felt great! I must have been on the toilet for ages, but a good dump that I haven't taken in years. Once I was finished I wiped up, but I felt another wave coming on so squeezed the last bit out of my guts and finished wiping. Pulled up my undies and pants and fastened my belt exit the stall, washed my hands and left to board the shuttle.

petite pooper: Wow! Cool, oh about those chamber pots, now they're pretty much used now as household decorations, but at one time used to poop and pee into at night without making the nightly trip to the outhouse. Thanks for keeping me posted and hope to see more posts from you, I guess I'm not the only one that likes to poop and pee in things other than the toilet. Have a great day.

Punk Rock Girl: How are you? Sorry to hear about your messed up bowel system, sound a little bit like me. Take care yourself and Happy Holidays to you as well.

Donny: You know, I kind agree with you on Concerned observation to their friends peeing. I thought because the way the Male anatomy and the female anatomy are designed differently which may explain why she pees so long and produced less. Interesting observation though.

Well hope liked my post, take care and have a nice week!


--Mr. Clogs

My daughter is so precious. She's 4 years old and wears Pull-Ups, because like me she's no stranger to "making" in her pants. She walked into my room last night while I was getting ready for bed, and she saw the diaper I had on. She knew about how I wear Depends, and I've had a discussion or two about it with her. Well, we opened up another dialogue. She sat on my bed and started to talk.

"Mom, is that your diaper?"
"Well, yes."
"They look like my Pull-Ups."
Since I wear the kind that pull up like regular underwear, she noticed there weren't any tapes or straps on the side like regular diapers. "That's right, honey. I put them on like big-girl underwear."
"But you have big-girl diapers!"
"Uh... yeah."
"I'm a big girl too, Mommy! Can I wear those instead of these Pull-Ups?"

I thought that was funny. I could only picture my little girl in those things. I told her about how they fit adults and all that stuff. Then she started asking me if I would need them forever, and if I'll never use the potty again. It made me reflect on it, thinking if in fact I would be wearing these for the rest of my life. I told her I didn't know, probably because... well, I really didn't.

I rember when I was in first grade. I did not know were the bath roo
was so I just played some more but I really had to pee badly.
I was up in the jungle gym holding my penis tightly and had my legs crossed. Then all of the pee started flowing and I must have peed for at least two minits strait! I was soaking wet after that.

last night i woke up in the middle of the night needing to pee, this has never happened to me before, whats going on? is this normal?

Well, I survived my second final. This time I also had to take a crap at around 10, but it was a nice easy solid one that came out quickly. I hated that I had to leave even for that but c'est la vie.

As far as movies, I'm surprised no one has mentioned Borat. There are quite a few potty scenes there.

I've only seen the movie once, so my details may be off...

The two that stick out in my mind (I think there were one or two others...someone else please fill in the details--I think there was one with him peeing in the ocean, for example).

So near the beginning of the movie, it shows him at, I think, the UN in NY or something where he is just squatting by a sign.

The other that waws super funny was when he was at a Southern couple's home for a dinner party and then after they directed him to the bathroom, he came back down with a bag full of shit asking where to put it. Then, he got a lecture from the woman about toilet usage. Maybe someone can describe this in better detail.

I was at our local library yesterday, and I 'got the urge to purge" I found the mens restroom, and rushed in. There were 2 toilet stalls without doors, and 3 urinals, Of course, both toilets were in use by gents in shirts and ties, librarians there who were taking their time relaxing, and chit-chatting, farting and loaf-pinching. Evidentally, the mens room is one of the few places at the library, where you can hold a conversation, and 'make noise' It stunk in there, but I had to 'wait it out" till one of the guys finished, and I got my shot to 'jump on the bowl' I exploded, and wiped and got the heck out of that stinky bathroom LOL

Hey Melissa-

That's happened to me a lot. Though I'm mostly a bedwetter, I have had more than my share of wetting accidents during the day. Since I started wearing diapers during the day I didn't mind it so much, but the way you told your story reminded me of a similar story.

This actually happened about two weeks ago. I was sitting at my computer at about two in the morning when I had to do a bowel movement. Since I am actually very good at controlling my bowels I went awhile before deciding I had to go. The bathroom had been occupied by one of my housemates at the time.

I was straining for about a half hour, and I knew I had another 10 or 15 minute wait considering this housemate takes forever in the shower. I knew that if I were to lose control I had my diaper, but I refused to soil myself because it would take me forever to clean up. I kept waiting and straining until I felt I was going to start pooping. I pooped a little bit with each time I forced it back, and by the time she got out I was already dirty. I ran into the bathroom but once I got up it all came out!

As I was cleaning myself up I noticed her soiled panties on the bathroom floor. She told me that it was because she had some bad cafeteria food and her stool was really runny. She woke up that night and she'd soiled herself in bed.

Yup, I ate a half gallon of my home made 3 alarm chili with habanero peppers, but not too many habaneros or it can easily turn into five alarm chili. Now, I've lived in the southwest a long time and I'm almost as good as the Mexicans at this. Some people believe you can be brought up on charges for serving this to some one. I use the canned habaneros which are a little more mellow than fresh ones. Not too many people will eat this version of my chili but I have fun serving it to my friends from the east coast. If you coat your mouth with an oil first it is easier. I usually eat it with a salad liberally tossed with olive oil. It is also a good excuse to drink mass quantities of beer. I make mild versions also. If you really want to pull a fast one, undercook the beans by about 50% (using dried beans of course). That increases gas production phenomenally. My asshole has gotten used to this but I get a tingly feeling. If U think it will burn too much on the way out, shove some vaseline up there first.

I once worked in a place with engineers. Engineers can be weird. I was the machinist. I was on the hopper one day and one of them came in and sat next door. We were merrily crapping away when I heard him say "Oh shit." I looked between the stall and the wall at the reflected image off the wall and saw that he had shit on the back of his long white dress shirt. He apparently neglected to get the shirt out of the way before sitting. I saw him pulling the shirt around himself to assess the damage. THEN, he pulled a pocket knife out of his pants pocket and cut the shitty end of the shirt off.

To Scooter,
That bowel movement you had in the middle of the night is NOT normal. I used to have those also after eating pizza once in a while. Thought it was just the pizza but as the years went by I developed rectal bleeding. Turned out to be Chrons Disease. If you have a nocturnal bowel movement again in the next few months go see a gastroenterologist. It is best to treat Chrons when it is mild. Repeat nocturnal bowel movements are not normal and usually are a sign of disease in the intestines but not always but most of the time. Keep an eye on it.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Next page: Old Posts page 1541 >

<Previous page: 1543
Back to the Toilet, "Boldly bringing .com to your bodily functions."
       Go to Page...    Forum       Survey