The lovely CARMALITA returns with her scintillating stories of pooing do…hola y bienvenidas, corazon. You on the pot and Patsy in a bucket…a double whammy.
Speaking of a double whammy…I am reminded of this time I went sailing with my girlfriend at a sailing club on a lake in the mid-continent of the U.S.. The club, being fairly new, had built these two-holer outhouses, one set for the women, the other for the men. After our picnic lunch I was felt a turdal urge well up in my lower abdomen, so I excused my self and went to the outhouse which had a toilet seat over the hole with a wooden platform and a partition between the toilet seats. It was a hot summer day and I was in my light blue bathing suit with a yellow side stripe…I pulled these down to my knees and sat on the seat farthest from the door…I was naked except for my swim suit and my flip-flop thong sandals. The sun beating down on the outhouse soon had me sweating profusely and the flies zipped around my bare bottom and equipment suspended over the pit. A loud fart echoed into the funky atmosphere, effectively killing my urge and I was forced to bear down and grun! t. My brown nether eye began to slowly open to emit a turd egg, I could feel the anal skin grow taunt, then yield to the pressure and drop out the turd then close…it fell with a PASH into the pit. Sweat was running freely now and my ass felt clammy. Just then the door to the outhouse flew open and in marched Old Dave the self-appointed salt of the club. "Well, Well, Well, just in time for a duet," Dave announced and began unbuckling his khaki shorts. I was trapped like a rat, still not having unburdened myself fully. He had skinny very tanned legs, a faded green polo shirt, a crumpled cheap dirty white captain's hat with a scraggly gray curly beard and old brown deck shoes. His blue eyes twinkled as he turned around to seat himself, all the while leering at my nakedness as his skinny ass found the seat. I leaned as far back as I could to put as much partition as possible between me and Old Dave…and bore down to get my poop out as quick as possible. FFLLLIIIIPPPPLLOOO! UUAAAppppp…Old Dave unloaded a wet mess into the pit. I was grossed out and Dave just laughed and said, "Heh, Heh, Heh…lucky I didn't drop that one in the boat house" I was grunting hard and fast, trying to escape…when Old Dave leaned forward around the partition and said, "When I was young like you sonny, I used to take a shit every day same time like clock work…now I need some Epsom Salts to help me along sometimes." With that he unloaded another wet, mushy mess BRRRIIIPPPAAAHHHHEEEUUUNNNT. At least the flies left my rump and went over to Dave where the funk was riper. Dave muttered, "Dang flies!" and blew another wet poo blast into the dankness under the outhouse. Finally, a healthy turd emerged from my sweaty behind and I wiped up fast and left old fart Dave to his bowel cleansing activities…Phew!
Around sunset, just before we were to head for home and no one was around, my girlfriend said she needed to use the outhouse. I walked her up the hill to the women's outhouse, she went in and flipped on the light. It was then that I noticed that there was a crack in the wooden door way down at the bottom and light was shining through. So being the peeper that I am, I squatted down and looked in. My girlfriend had taken the first seat, her yellow bikini bottoms around her knees…a splattering tinkle was echoing from under her. I was looking up at her from my lower level peep hole and saw her lovely body settled on the toilet seat…she just had her bikini top on and thong sandals. All of a sudden she went up on her tip toes her, her belly heaved and a look of concentration came over her face, her brown eyes staring straight ahead…she gave a slight UMMPH and the unmistakable but muffled crackle of a descending turd. I was freaked out at the scene…her seated there with a ! tense belly and a long one hanging below her lovely bum while she concentrating fully on her hole and the associated feelings of relief we all know and love. Her belly tensed a few times as she expelled the last of her colon load. She grabbed the toilet paper and stuck it way back under her between her legs and worked her hand around. She pulled it out and sized up the light own smear she had made on the paper. Two more passes got her clean, then a swipe at her pee hole. She stood up tugging her yellow bikini bottoms into place. I assumed a nonchalant position against a tree outside. She came out smiling and kissed me then said she was going over to use the pay phone to call home to tell them we were leaving the lake. She disappeared around the corner and I quickly ducked into the outhouse and peered into the commode seat she had just vacated and saw her large light brown poo pile partially covered by used paper. I quickly retreated flipped off the light with a grin ! and a buzz and headed over to the pay phone she was calling from.
To Chrissy & Gyropokes: Well it's always nice to be recognised! Yes I did write a few times to another forum, but that was about four years ago. Some people have good memories. I would write some more, but I have so little time these days. I like to read the posts here of course. Just off for another dance rehearsal.
BTW, I had a really good poo on the train last week!
Keith: I am told that when someone has surgery below the navel area that they often suffer retention of urine afterward. A friend of mine had hernia surgery. He tried and tried to pee in a urinal afterward but couldn't go. He was too embarrassed to tell the nurse (a woman). When she found out that he hadn't voided after the operation for about 8 hours she brought in a catheter to drain his bladder. It had about a liter in it. In your hospital do they allow female nurses to catheterize male patients? Do you do it to both male and female patients? P. S. I like the way you tell your stories. Any stories on this subject?
You mention having dreams about bathrooms. Strangely enough, I, too, have had the same dream numerous dreams from time to time. In my dream, I find myself in a huge coed bathroom where the toilets are open and visible for everyone to see. And usually the bathroom consists of many different sections and parts and rooms, all with open toilets all over. The weird thing is that I have had this dream on occasion my whole life, since childhood, I think. And every time, I think to myself, "Wow! this is a neat bathroom! I have been waiting to find something like this my whole life and I finally have!" And then it turns out to be a dream.
This morning I woke up well before my alarm went off having to pee quite badly. I debated not getting up to do it but realized that I would be in serious discomfort if I went back to sleep as I was already in the really painful bladder thing. So, I went up to the bathroom, gathered my gray nightshirt around my chest tight on my back and lowered my white panties to the floor and sat down. At first the pee wouldn't come out and I thought that was just cause I had to go so bad and had been holding it in all night (I had a lot to drink just before going to bed) but tried to relax and it still wouldn't come out. My stomach really hurt from having to pee so badly, so I forced it out by bearing down as hard as I could. This allowed a drop to squirt out. Usually, after that first squirt starts, the nice steady stream will continue. But this time it didn't. I had to keep pushing and squirting for about 5 minutes until the pressure was relieved (though I didn't feel "done"). I ! finally decided that I couldn't get any more out so I wiped, flushed and washed my hands before going back to bed. After that (a bit before 8) I didn't go all day until after 2...
Oh, and I did have the big poop I said I was due for last night. I tried to do it standing like you all always talk about but I didn't like that much, it felt very dirty brushing against my crack. I prefer being able to spread my cheeks apart so there is very little smearing. It was fairly soft too though. After the first one droped about, a small one about 1 in by 3 in, I sat down and quickly out slid a 7 in by 1 in also quite soft log. I pushed hard feeling not quite down and a tiny little sliver came out but that was all. It was very soft and easy, so it took lots of wiping.
Have a good weekend all.
Dave-ND (formerly Dave-NY)
Sorry for the repetition of the change of name, but I thought it necessary for anyone who missed my last post or forgot that I changed my name on here.
Anyway, I had a really hard poop this afternoon. Just under a week and a half ago, I pooped, and had been holding it for about 4 days when I finally went. I felt really full and bloated, but all I could manage was an insignificant bunch of soft mushy stuff. Although I still felt a huge mass inside me, I just could not make it move, so I decided to give up and let it come out when it wanted to. Anyway, I left it alone for about 5 more days, of course the last of which being today. I was feeling really stuffed the whole 5 days, but I still thought it would be best to let it come out on its own, so I kept waiting, but I just couldn't wait anymore today. Coming home from Meteorology class, the urge hit me big time, but I kept my composure and made it back to my room, dropped of my bag, and nearly sprinted the 5 doors down the hall to the bathroom. As I sat down, I could already feel it pushing out, but I decided to let it come on its own. After a few seconds though, th! e pressure in my hole just got too much, and I had to push, and boy did it ever hurt! It felt as if I were pushing out a bowling ball, and I was surprised when it was only about 2 inches thick, but with about 7 or so logs, it completely covered the hole in the can. This lasted all of about 30 seconds. And I didn't have to wipe more than 3 times, which is pretty rare for me. Just thought I'd share that little experience with you all. Feel free to respond in whatever way you can or want to.
Happy crapping to all!
Jacob G in Florida
Hello everyone. I finally have another story to post. Last Saturday night, a friend and I sat outside on my screened patio and ate pizza. After we finished, he announced that he needed to pee and said he would just do it in my backyard. Although I have a privacy fence and woods are behind my house and on one side of it, I do have neighbors on the other side. I wouldn't let him and made him go inside to pee. He did and came back out to the patio. A few minutes later, he announced he needed to take care of something else (unmentionable on this site) and said he would do it in my backyard. I said "hell no" and actually stood in the doorway to prevent him from going outside. We talked for about another hour. Then, he announced he needed to go home to take a shit. Sarcastically, I said, "Why don't you just do it in my backyard?" Without saying a word, he got up, went inside to my kitchen, and came back out with paper towels in his hand. Shocked, I said, "What are you d! oing? - I was joking!" I stood in the doorway, but he pushed me aside, walked out to the edge of my deck, pulled down his pants, and hung his butt over the edge. "STOP," I yelled, but it was too late. He bent over, grabbed his ankles and started grunting - GRRRRRR- UNNNGH. I nervously looked toward my neighbor's house. Fortunately, they were not on their deck. Also, it was very dark. My friend grunted again - GRRRRR - UHHHGH. Then, I heard the plopping sound of his turds hitting the leaves below. He stood up and we both started laughing. I asked if he was done, and he said, "not yet." With that, he bent over again, grabbed his ankles, and gave another big push - UNNNGGGGRRR. I heard more plopping to the leaves below. He said, "okay, I'm done now." He wiped, but there was nothing on the paper towel. He said, "cool!" I went inside, got a flashlight, and shinned it on the turds. They were huge. He picked them up with the other paper towels and threw them over th! e fence into the woods. He said he had never pooped outside before, but that it felt really good and natural and that he would like to do it again someday. I still can't believe he did it in my backyard.
TO SIMONE Loved your story, i too have done just that i wore my black leather pants and incontinance pants on underneath, walked into a leather store and while looking at the skirts pants etc i release a big poo into my plastic pants.
I have no idear why i love doing that maybe i want to see the reaction of the girls in the store ( it sometimes smells)but anyway i do love the feeling of it in the rear of my pants.
FAT WOMAN…sorry I didn't see my 260 lb. Mother-in-law finish her poo session that was interrupted by a phone call. But the image of her lying on the bed in her nightie with an unwiped bum festering between her generous butt cheeks until such time as she could return to the bathroom to take care of that chore is kind of interesting.
However, the other day at work I saw this large woman, with light brown hair and blue eyes waddling down the hall. She had on a light blue gingham dress and large boobs and very wide hips. She was wearing athletic socks and Keds type sneakers. She walked past two women's rooms and swept past me into the one with the handicapped stall, which is bigger than the rest to accommodate wheelchairs and, in this case, her ample bottom. The louvers lower down on the door gave me an earful as the handicapped stall, which creaks, swung open. I couldn't see anything, but she was soon struggling with her underwear and sighed heavily as she must have seated herself on the commode. Soft grunting was soon heard and I leaned back against the wall with my newspaper to act like I was waiting for someone. I heard a gushing tinkle and more grunting. She must have really gotten into the next one, because A redhead in tight jeans ran past me gasping. The women's room door swings back slo! wly, so I could see into the restroom as the redhead grabbed the handicapped door and jerked it open, exposing the large woman in the middle of a red-faced grunt. Her gingham dress was up over the top of her thighs which hung down past the commode seat. She was hunched up and her wide white panties were just below her knees. She was concentrating hard on her hole down under and looked up in surprise as the red head slammed the door and grabbed the next one dashing in…but then the women's restroom door swung shut. Just as the large woman UUMMMPHHED, the sound of explosive diarrhea drown out any sound of a falling turd from the hefty lady. "SORRYYYY" the redhead said and fired off another mushy wet salvo. I guess it was the fat lady that answered with a thunderous fart, because the redhead was whimpering , "Ooooooh" softly as she released another torrent. A lot of flushing went on and I retreated down the hall. The large lady waddled out of the rest room and came down t! he hall toward me and nodded and smiled when I flashed her a big toothy grin. I could see a bead of perspiration on her upper lip as she went by…a testament to her recent laboring to relieve herself.
So FAT WOMAN…is constipation a frequent problem for large women, perhaps because the muscle tone is not there to help with the expelling process. My wife once knew a fat girl who would eat French fries smothered with mustard to get herself going when she was constipated. I'll bet that gave her a warm hole as it worked its way out. Hope to hear from you soon (Gruntly).
I love that picture you can see her load
to Keith: I love that story about having to shave the boy cool
I did take a masive dump last night i had a 12" log which was brown in color. Felt good coming out
Last monday I was in a car on the way back to town from the ski field. When we left, I had tried really hard to take a shit, but nothing happened. It probably had something to do with the f???ing stinky dodgy dunnies. The trip back was about two hours, and when we made it to the outskirts of town I was hit with that horrible feeling. I managed to keep it restrained, but the pain was intense :( From then on I was in serious trouble. I became aware that I was not holding in a nice solid managable turd. This was a steaming buttload of crappy custard. Every red light was hell, and seemed to unleash demons in the nether regions of my guts . We finally made it to my friends girlfriends mothers place. I made it inside with my undies unstained, asked to use the crapper and didn't wait for an answer. The actual act of shitting was very pleasurable, because the pain I was in was diminishing with every squirt. The noises were violent. When I rose, (The act of wiping was suprisingly a no! rmal 4 paper wipe) the bowl was covered in a vile stinky dark brown paste. So to make sure it all be gone without tell-tale extra flushes I pissed it off. :)))
So ends the story of the best shite of my life.
My poor boyfriend has been suffering from constipation. He’s been working long hard hours, he’s on his feet all day and his diet has left much to be desired lately – lots of takeaways and convenience foods and not much fresh stuff. His stools have been so hard and dry that they’ve now given him piles. I heard him on the toilet the other day, moaning and groaning, straining to get his poo out, so I went into the bathroom to see if he was ok.
His poor face was red and sweaty from straining. I told him to relax, not to push any more. I kissed his hot forehead and told him to lean forward so I could see if anything was happening. Oh you should have seen it, what a mess. His anus looked so red and swollen, like his rectum had prolapsed. I thought I was going to have to call the doctor out. There was no poo in the bowl.
I told him to come and lie on the bed. He did a little wee first and squeezed his foreskin dry, then I took his pants off and led him to the bed. He was waddling, his arse was so sore. I spread a towel out and had him lie on his side with his knees up. I fetched a sponge and some warm water and washed all around his balls and anus, then patted him dry carefully. He’d got some piles which were protruding, they looked sore and swollen.
He said his ???? was aching from all the poo inside him. I told him I’d take care of his bottom first then his ???? would soon feel better, I rubbed it gently for him and he groaned in pain. I found my bum cream, it’s a nice greasy ointment that shrinks piles, and I spread plenty around his anus and gently massaged it around. Slowly and carefully, I eased his piles back up his rectum. They were fairly bulbous and popped back in easily. When his rosebud looked almost tight, I eased some more ointment up him, careful not to hurt him. He seemed fairly comfortable with this so I completely coated my middle finger in the ointment, and slid it right up him and worked it around his rectum. I could feel him pushing against my finger.
I told him to relax and not to push. He said he could feel it moving down. My finger was stimulating his peristalsis, and the ointment was greasing the passage for the dry stool. There was loads of cream in his bum now, so I washed my hands and came back to rub his back and ????. ‘Ooh babe, it’s coming, I think’, he said, and he wanted to get up and go to the bathroom. I told him to lie there on his side and evacuate if he could, so his piles didn’t come down again. He was horrified and said he’d make a mess, but I told him that his motion was so dry and hard that it wouldn’t stain. I went and got lots of kitchen towel paper and spread it underneath him, on the towel.
I had him draw his knees right up and I gently parted his ass cheeks. He passed a little gas and apologised but I told him it was good, and to try a little push. I kept up the massage on his ????, and he said it felt like it was cutting him inside. I told him to rest a while, so he took some breaths and then all of a sudden he gave a big push and his swollen anus started to dome out, and a big dark motion slowly emerged. Oh, it did look sore. I took some sheets of paper and caught it and eased it out of him. It was almost black, very lumpy, no wonder it was hurting him. That was the big one, soon more little lumpy bits followed until he felt completely empty. He was panting and exhausted and sore.
I wrapped the turds carefully in the paper and took them to the bathroom, so the bedroom wouldn’t get smelly while I cleaned him. I laid them in the paper in the bath in case he wanted to see what he’d done. I went back and sponged his anus with the cool water, then dried him and applied more cream. I fetched him some clean pants, then we went to see what he’d produced. He wasn’t pleased with himself, this keeps happening because he works too hard and won’t eat properly.
Poor baby. I don’t mind taking care of him, but I feel sorry for him when it hurts him.
Vince. I suppose it's possible that some people don't go for #1 before leaving home in the morning, either from choice or lack of time. However I think most do go quite simply because they wouldn't last long into the day if they didn't.
Carol. It's as I thought. I suspected you were prone to constipation. Only going for #2 when the need arises may be the most natural thing to do. However, I guess it has some drawbacks. My guess is that there have been plenty of times when the need has arisen at an inconvenient time or in an inconvenient place and you've had to hang on longer than you'd like, perhaps ending up fart a lot.
Thanks to all for the welcome!
I really enjoy reading the posts! I am trying to get my cousin Annie to post here. I think she is still a little shy about it. The big news is that she emailed my daughters about all of this. I think they have heard some of the stories. Not from me, though. I often wonder if they had simular experiences of toilet bonding. I'm sure they had. I used to hear them giggle in the loo. I married a woman from London. We never had any embarrassment about seeing each other on the toilet. It was very natural. Now that she is gone, I have memories and my daughters. Well,enough of that.
CARMALITA: When you become a senora will Renee still be able to experience your toilet exploits? Your post about you squatting over the toilet was priceless. Take care, Robby
RIZZO: Thanks for the kind words. Yes, memories are a good thing. They never die. BTW, 6 years older,eh? Well, we aren't old, mate! Cheers from Robby
ANDREW: The story about Kendal was a hoot. Branchy Bottom. That is a new one. Kendal must have been in a real state. This reminds me of an experience that I will share latter. I know you will always be there for her even if you are many miles away. I will let you know about Annie. Take care, my friend. Robby PS, that experience can be read in my post to Kendal.
KENDAL: I will not call you Branchy Bottom. Oops, I did. I may get a grrrrrr for that. Yes, I have read many of the old posts. I didn't read the story how you and Andrew startedWhen my daughter Meghan was your age, we were on a camping trip. One morning she had to go badly. She ran to the wooded area with her mum and sister hot on her heels. All three of them sat on a hugh log. They let out booming farts, pee, and then they pooed up a storm. Naturally I had to follow. They were too busy to pay attention to me. They wiped, stood up, and saw me. My daughters screamed, "How could you Daddy." Well, my wife was laughing hysterically. Then I started howling. Susan, my wife, took me by the hand and led me down the path. The girls were not that amused. They didn't speak to me the rest of the day but they came around eventually. It was something. Now, as in my last post to you, I want tell you as in my relationship with Annie your relationship will NOT part with Andrew's departure! . Annie's and mine only got closer through the years, if that was possible. Take care, love from Robby
RACHEL: I feel for you. I had the same thing happen to me when I was 14. I was really embarrasing. I am glad the receptionist was understanding.
CHEERS TO ALL, ROBBY
This is a short note to Andrew and Kendal. I have been reading the old posts enjoying the exploits and love you have for each other. Also, I read about the tragic situations in your lives. Know that I will be as a friend, or whatever you want to name me, here to support you. Please do tell me the story of how you started watching each other. I will email Annie, also. You both take care, Love from Robby
MARGE- Try drinking some water, that usualy helps you to pee.
Plunging Plop Guy
I feel I've been living through my own personal nightmare the last few days, and it's not quite over yet, but feeling more confident than I was about it.
Basically, it's the constant strong urges to go the toilet and sit feeling desperate to do it, but unable to push it out. sometimes, neither pushing nor straining works, and I've tried patiently waiting as well, but at times the desire to relieve myself is so strong, that it seems my guts actually contract and with an almighty expulsive action eventually push the stuff out.
It's not hard stools, just too soft to get a grip on, so I'm resisting the inclination to dose up on fruit and fibrous stuff that would only exacerbate, as it has already done, the condition.
The latest advice I received was that I may be lactose intolerant and so I've stopped all dairy products, but believe me, this is NOT fun!
I've not been feeling up to posting the last few days, nor wanted to think about it as shitting for the last few days has had no pleasure for me, and I've tried to avoid references to it that I otherwise find fascinating.
As well as all this discomfort, inconvenience etc. I'm going away next week for a few days and wanted to know if I'd be up to it, or would have to be permanently near a toilet and waste hours trying to use it! even though I'm now sitting here squirming with desire to go, I want to wait till it's unbrearable, to be sure I'll at least do something! Anyway, better than yesterday, and eating more stodgy food today.
I've never heard of anyone having this before, and wouldn't wish it on anyone, as it totally occupies your life while you want to keep going so much but can't feel relieved. Sometimes I sit there on the toilet and feel I'm doing one and after several minutes wonder what's happening and realise not only is it not even sticking out ready to drop, it's not even there! I wipe my arse with TP and it's clean! Where is it if I feel temporarily relieved? It must merely have moved down into the rectum and that's as far as it got!
I've reduced the psyllium husks I was prescribed and will just count on the fact that I have been worsening instead of helping things.
Avoid this misadventure, anyone who confuses constipation with stools that are too soft to pass!
Thanks, EPHEMERAL, for your concern and hope that any of this might have been useful to you if your condition has been caused the same way.
Several more great posts about guys in open plan toilets, which Bryian has, as usual, responded to with the same enjoyment as I have reading them!
I see I've really missed something yet again on British TV; namely the "Hollyoaks, Moving On" programme that TONY saw.
I'd love to have sen that so hope it's repeated. As Tony said, this hitherto taboo area seems to be gradually being thought less controversial now, probably helped by such as "Eurotrash" on Channel 4 amongst other rather anarchic and explicit shows.
A loud plop would have been terrific, but perhaps it was thought we're not quite ready yet, although the "The Body" programme of the 1970s featuring the guy on a toilet and his loud plop as he grunted one out, as I read about here, must have been a real break with convention and shocked many people! For a guy to be seen on a toilet obviously in the act of shitting and on TV really makes me wonder how it can can be considered private, if nothing of the actual anus or genitals is seen.
Can it really be intrusive to see a guy on a toilet without his express permission, but without his express denial of such observation?
Many people here have in the past if not still are now in the position to either willingly partake in mutual shitting sessions, or enjoy listening to others within the home.
Even though I was very observant about the home when I was growing up, I have absolutely no recollection of ever hearing anyone else in the house on the toilet. There wasn't anyone I wanted to hear, even though at an early age I was very interested in the idea, but even with good toilets at wherever we lived, I never heard a thing! perhaps they were all inhibited and avoided plop sounds but I recently thought how strange never heard it!
Got to go now, the urge is with me and quite strong now ! Cheers PPG
Just wanted to share this!
After all the difficulties in going to the toilet over the last few days, and this afternoon feeling really full and uncomfortable so that I was sitting funny and longed to do something, I felt somehow that when I got home I would at last get some relief.
I sat on the toilet with no sense of being able to drop anything though my rectum felt like it was ready to burst with all the shit inside. So,itwasgoing to have to be;push, strain, wait, and patience until I could do it. Eventually, and with straining, I dropped a minute turd, then after several minutes, the feeling of a big one was getting pushed down, with lots of retractions until it felt like a whopper and when it went; a good plop that splashed my balls. Great! But was there more? Yes, another big turd was on its slow journey out and gently, Ifelt it getting too big for comfort as it plopped out and gave me a splash on my arse-crack. Brilliant! I was in action again! Any more?
Just a few small ones and the feeling of being empty at last, Relief, satisfaction, pride and though I'd slightly got that feeling of descended piles from all that work, I'm feeling great!
Like many of us, the effort put into having a tough shit can be really pleasurable, and this was a tough shit, but to feel comfortable at last and not have to feel like I want to go all evening as I have recently will be great.
Looking down the toilet at what I'd done, I wished I could have done it in a public toilet and left it for others to admire, not as massive as the sizes frequently mentioned here, but it's the best I've done for days, and a beautiful and healthy sight!
Worth sitting back on the toilet and doing something else that will relieve me!
I see the "Hollyoaks" omnibus edition is on Channel 4 tonight, so will be watching that for the guy sitting on the toilet working hard to do one like I was!
Wishing everyone here, Pleasure on the toilet!! P P G
I replied to you when you first posted to this forum and I said I thought you were suffering from Avoidant Paruresis. In your latest post, you repeat your statement that you wish you could overcome the problem.
Perhaps you missed my initial reply, but I believe that in coming to this site, you _have_ found the help you need.
To repeat, I must suggest you seek advice from the poster 'PV'. She is a lovely Australian lady who is a regular poster, and who for many years shared your affliction. I can say with great confidence that she will be able to give you the help you need with your problem. After all, who is better qualified, someone with an academic certificate, or someone with the insight, experience and ability to give guidance that only a fellow sufferer can provide? She has been there, done it and beaten it. So can you. You will be able to write to her without fear or
She has indicated her willingness to help you, so go on - write to her!
It could change your life for the better. The best of luck to you.
To our fellow posters, I'd like to make a happy announcement, following some pressure from Louise to do so <snicker>.
Louise and I will marry in the summer of 2002. We've known for some months that we would, and some people say that it's about time!
Bye for now,
Friday, September 21, 2001