I also do things like that (well, not on chairs because I don't want to mess up the chair or rug). Just when sitting on the toilet, I will almost let the pee come out and then stop and hold it. It feels good. I pee in weird places for the fun of it. Not too weird though, only into things that can be emptied and washed out afterwards.
I went to the doctor recently and was asked for a urine sample. The bathroom was so cramped that I wound up peeing on my hand accidentally and when I got the sample to the nurse it was deep yellow. I guess that's because it was the first pee of the morning.
I liked the story of you making a video of one of your best friends pooping. Maybe you can watch him on a semi-regular basis. Say to him "You know that time that I made the video of you pooping, well it found it interesting watching you. Could I watch you some other time you go?" Of course, he may want to make a video of you going. Are you ready for that? You never know; nothing ventured, nothing gained.
He wanted to go on newspaper. I think this is the best position for you to watch. To me it is "sexy" to see a guy squatting down and then I go round the back to watch the action! However, instead of newspaper I suggest a paper towel with some aluminium foil below to stop the wetness getting through. But be careful, these North American toilets seem to block easily.
Having lived on both sides of the Atlantic, I have noticed several differences between the UK and North American toilets, one of these being the diameter of the outlet. The UK one are perhaps 30% larger and less prone to blockage. I have a friend who lives in the Vancouver area, but used to live in the UK and he worked for a company that designed bathroom fittings. He related two stories told him by a salesman and are supposed to be true.
1. A woman who was looking for a new bathroom suite was asked by the salesman "Do you want an S or a P?" She replied "I want it for both." To the readers not familiar with this, the outlet from the UK toilets can either go into the floor or the wall behind. The S and P refer to the shape that the outlet pipe follows. The floor entry type (like North American typically) would be a P whereas the wall mount is the S. After the water trap, the pipe goes up and then back down a little before going into the wall and looks like an S.
2. Another customer had complained that the toilet was not flushing away properly. Someone went out to investigate. The sales office later received a phone call about the man carrying a turd with him which he flushed down the toilet to test it. It was explained that this was not a real turd, but was made of some materials to have the consistency and size, and behave like one when flushed. It was in fact a "British Standards" turd, made to specifications! The North American equivalents of British Standards are UL and CSA.
To Donny: I liked your hospital story
To Aaron: I liked your accident stories and the stories about your dreams
Last night i dreamed about this bathroom i think it was unisex or something and the stalls were placed around funny and i had to poop. So then i took this open stall which was a chair with a big sheet of wax paper. I was going to shit on that then you throw it away. Then i woke up and my stomach felt funny like i really had to poop i go to the bathroom and nothing happens then i went to bed. I thought this was from this medicine i was taking.
Hi grrl. Stress can do all sorts of things to you, it can turn your digestion upside down and produce bowel habits that seem right off the wall. Thinking back, all the problems I had as a pre-teen were during my most stressful school years (grotty toilets that I would never use if I could ever help it -- no wonder I got so bunged up.)
So, the watchword is relax. Chill out, as they say, and things should settle down a bit for you.
Wishing you pleasant poops and non-stressful, easy, relaxing pees,
This is a story of something that happened to me a while ago (I was 11). My best friend was at my house. And being pre-teens, we decided to compare penises.
Now, he was circumcised, but I wasn't. His first reaction was, Eew, you weren't circumcised. But then I showed him why the foreskin was so amazing. We went into the bathroom and I stood over the toilet. My foreskin is pretty long, so I usually have to pull it back to pee. But what I did was, I held the tip of my foreskin closed, and I peed and my foreskin bubbled. He wanted to see me let go. I said, "This is the fun part." I let go and let it all fall out.
I think the smell a woman emits during a good poop is quite enjoyabe. I posted here a few months back about My Aunt who is very beautiful coming the bathroom and pooping while I was in the tub. I used to stage walk ins on her because She never bothered to lock the door unless their were a lot of people in the house. Usually when She and I were there alone She would just go in and barely shut the door behind her sit down and do her business. Not to say she was particuarly open about this, She just seemed very comfortable around me. She would always have these cute little things she would say as I entered the bathroom, something like, "whoops, you scared the poop out of me" or something to that effect. I remember walking in and before I knew it I was sitting on the edge of the tub carrying on a conversation about school or something and as she spoke you could hear the grunts in her speech and hear the turds coming out and falling into the water, Usually one big "faloop" and a bu! nch of little "ploops." and as this was going on she would act like nothing was happening at all except the grunty conversation.
There's a 2-lane highway near here that's become so busy and dangerous lately that I decided to take the back roads on Sunday evening to return home from another city. That brought me through a really tiny crossroads village. Well, I decided that it couldn't wait any longer, it was time to do something about that dump that was begging to happen all afternoon. (Made me think of you, Anne, the bus driver, and your on the road stories.)
Right at the village center is a modern convenience store, probably the biggest, brightest place in town. I knew they'd have decent facilities there. I parked and went inside to find two, 20-ish, female employees behind the counter, so I decided to have a bit of fun. I screwed up my face with this urgent look and said to one of them, "I need to use your restroom, OK?" (I really did, just not that badly.) "Sure," she told me, pointing the way to the back.
It turned out to be a unisex, combined restroom/cleaning supplies room, very clean. I got comfortable on the elongated, open front seat and turned to the business at hand. At home I usually take a dump without much pushing, if any, but when I'm out, even if I have to go badly and I'm alone, as I was there, I find that I have to push and strain a bit to get things moving. Anyone else that way?
When the deed was done, it was a real stinker! It was hard to be humble about that production. After wiping and washing up, I debated whether or not to use the can of odor-masking spray. I usually hate that stuff, but I guess it was there for a purpose and I didn't want to be discourteous, so I gave the room a couple of shots. Yeeccchhh!
When I walked out of the room about 5 minutes later, the store was empty. I thanked the employees and said, "You can bill me for all that toilet paper I used." They both laughed a bit and one said, "We'll do that." The ice broken, I said, "Wow, everything just hit me all at once when I was driving through here. Did everything ever hit you all at once like that?" One of them gave me a sheepish grin, nodded, and said, "Oh, yeah." With that, I said so long. I'll bet not many customers get onto that topic with them.
After admiring the young woman up top, take a look at the potty. I don't envy her using it. The bowl on that kind of toilet is convex under your behind, not concave. It has to do with the trap design. If you like skid marks, this is your kind of bowl. If you're dropping a really long log, it can topple over and smear your ass - not a pleasant thing. Oh well, maybe she has more TP to wipe with than some of the other recent potty ladies up there.
i was drivin home from work and needing to pee bad when traffic slowed then stopped on me. i grabbed for my crotch and squeezed my dick tryin to hold it. nothing was moving. next to me came up a truck with 2 knock out chicks. we ended up next to each other sittin still. i tried holdin my piss without bein obvious how bad i needed to go,but i had to squeeze my legs together hard. a few minutes went by and we hadnt moved but my legs sure were. i was wrigglin back and forth and squeezin my legs together but it wasnt enough,i could feel my pee tryin to escape my penis. i couldnt help but grab my peter and hold tight,squeezin and rubbin hard. i needed to piss soo bad i couldnt wait much longer. i kept rubbin myself hard and pinchin the tip tryin not to pee in my pants. i knew the girls in the truck next to me were watchin but i couldnt stop squeezin. finally traffic started movin but i couldnt,i needed to peee too bad. as i moved ahead in traffic i pissed all in my pants soakin ! my crotch and seat.
i was sitting in the library reading and working when i felt the need to pee. i was really into whati was doin so i sat squeezin my legs together for a while. finally i couldnt hold it anymore so i went to the desk to ask for the key to the bathroom. the lady said she didnt have the key,it was bein cleaned and it would be a few minutes. i shoved my hand in my pocket to squeeze my peter and kinda crossed my legs tryin not to be obvious how bad i needed to peeeee.
i asked how long,she said soon and smiled a little,then offered to let me know when they were done. i agreed and walked quick back to my corner and sat. sittin helped me hold my pee in,i had to squeeze only a little until my peter swelled needin to pee then i couldnt stop movin. i bounced a little on the seat. clamped my legs together tight. lookin around i grabbed my crotch and rubbed hard and fast tryin to hold my pee. i couldnt wait no more,i grabbed my peter with both hands grippin hard as i pissed a stream thru my hands and covering my crotch soakin it.
I remember seeing George Clooney on a late night talk show a couple of years ago. He was telling the host that years ago, his room-mate had a cat. Every day, George would secretly clean all the cat poop out of the litterbox. His room-mate became worried that his cat was ill, since there wasn't ever any cat poop in the litterbox. Little did he know, that George was cleaning the cat box. Finally, his room-mate became frantic, almost to the point of taking the cat to the vet. Then, on like the 5th day, George poops a huge turd in the litter box and promptly tells his room-mate that the cat finally took a shit. The room-mate was amazed that such a huge turd could come out of a cat. True story.
Tuesday, October 31, 2000
Lawn Dogs Kid
Well, life goes on ! Kendal was such a comfort to me on Sunday, which was really the worst day for me after Chloe came round to tell me she didn't want to go out with me, but with my mate Michael instead. The next worst bit was not sitting with Chloe on the bus to school anymore, and seeing them both together. I was dreaming about them last night. It was a bit voyeuristic. I was like a spirit that followed them everytime they went into a bathroom together. I watched as Chloe had a wee for him still wearing her school uniform. I dreamt she had a wee for him wearing those favourite cut off below the knees tight jeans she loved to wear in warmer weather. The final dream was her having one of her famous loud poos wearing that wonderful short black skirt. I woke before the end of that, much to my disappointment. But after waking, I was able to day-dream the end of it instead ! I will get over Chloe, in time I suppose. If she prefers Michael, then so be it. I'm better off without ! her ! But she was my first real romance. They say you never forget your first love. Well the image of Chloe sitting on the toilet I'm sure will be with me for the rest of my life !
KENDAL: I'm so pleased you got to be the first to see Kirsty go to the toilet. I think it just shows how much she trusts you my little princess, and how much more she values you as a friend. She and Chloe aren't speaking anymore, but she would love to still stay friends with you. Isn't that wonderful ? Speaking of Kirsty, I can tell you why she only managed a dribble at your house. It was because she had been at mine ! Just for...
CC AUSTRALIA: a description of what I could see and hear of Kirsty at the toilet ! She had gone in and locked the bathroom door. I quickly positioned myself on the floor with my head out my bedroom door, laid flat to the carpet so as to peep under the bathroom door, and my legs and torso laid inside my bedroom. To be fair, you can't see that much under the door, but you can hear what is happening ! I heard the rustle of her clothing, the zzziiipppp noise of her zipper on her jeans being lowered, and then more shuffling and rustling. I could see her feet, already pointing towards me the whole time, gently lifting up and down at the heal, as she steadily lowered her jeans bit by bit, until so much material appeared to be around her feet that I could make the assumption that she likes her jeans to be round her ankles. As I said, you can't see that much under the door ! Then there was a further sliding noise which I presume was her lowering her panties. It didn't seem to be! a short noise, nor was there any secondary noise. What I mean by that is, when I watch my beautiful cousin Kendal go, she likes her panties to still be high up her legs. She does this by pulling them at least half way down her legs until the gusset has pulled away from her crotch region, and then she pulls them back up again towards the top of her legs. However, back to Kirsty. I then heard a gentle pat sound of bottom being placed on toilet seat. And then her feet shuffled a bit before raising her heels so she appeared to be just sitting with her tiptoes on the floor. She made a very steady tinkle. Well really it was more like sprinkling rather than tinkling, as in a far gentler noise than a tuneful tinkle makes, with the slightest hint of a hiss at the same time. It all lasted around 15 seconds, and I could hear her removing toilet paper from the roll before she finished. Her feet went flat to the floor initially as I heard the rustle of paper and then I watched as the flat! s of her feet turned inwards before a wiping sound could be heard. I'm convinced this must mean she wipes between her legs ! Then with feet flat to the floor again, I heard the rustling as she pulled her panties back up again, the snap sound of the elastic as she let go of it around her ?????, and then the further rustling of her pulling her jeans back up, accompanied by the view of the folds of material disappearing from her feet. Then the zzziiippp noise of zipper being fastened back up again. Then her feet turned, and the familiar rush of water began to sound as she flushed the lever. Now I make my escape fully back into my bedroom ! How was that CC ?
Kirsty's visit was surprisingly early, but after I'd had my dump thank goodness ! Her family had forgotten about the clocks going back. She is a lovely girl, much more like Kendal in her mannerisms than Chloe. But she was so uncomfortable with me the whole time before saying she would leave to find Kendal while I waited for Chloe to arrive. Now I know why she was so uncomfortable ! Chloe had told her of her secret intentions.
PS to CC AUSTRALIA: Not living in Australia, I don't know most of the girls you were referring to in your favourite list of women you would love to watch on the toilet. However, I have to agree with you about Flick from Neighbours, and what about her sister Steph ? However, I couldn't believe that when I did my own list a few weeks ago that I forgot about Hayley in Home and Away ! We aren't able to watch this in UK anymore, not for a year anyway due to some arguement between the TV company who used to show it and the new one taking over. However, I look forward to renewing toilet thoughts about Hayley when the program restarts !
LINDA: So Kendal says you peeped at my undies ! Did you like the colour ? I put them on especially in honour of you !
Despite all the trauma of Sunday for me, it ended in the most special of ways, with Kendal taking me with her while she had her poo. People have referred to the boredom of seeing the same partners etc. on the toilet and that it is more exciting thinking about seeing the stranger ! I will never tire of seeing my precious little cousin. She was wearing trousers today, seeing as it is getting much colder ( and very windy ! ). With the material being loose fitting, after she had undone them, they slipped lightly to the ground, cascading in folds around her feet and ankles where she was quite happy to leave them. Then she lowered her white panties to around half way down her legs, the poo position as she and I affectionately refer to it as ! Then she hauled her pretty little bottom over the toilet and sat holding onto the seat with both hands. Her lovely bright blue eyes fixed on mine as she concentrated on the job in hand. Firstly her wee tinkled tunefully into the water be! low for 10 or 15 seconds. Then came the silence, the tiniest hint of a little wind, and then soft crackling. Sometimes you don't even hear her poo coming, but today it was announcing its appearance. The warmth and brightness that filled her eyes as that first poo fell into the water with a resounding plop melted my heart. She is always so proud now to make a good plop noise with her poos. And even though the final two slipped into the water with barely a flop noise, she was more than happy with that first one. She positively beamed at me as the last poo fell, before then reaching for the toilet roll. After she finished and we walked out of the bathroom, we hugged, and then she lifted her face up to me and while resting her chin on my chest, and her eyes flicking from side to side as she looked at both my eyes in turn, she said "I know you won't be able to watch Chloe anymore, but I promise you'll always be able to watch me". Cue for the day to end in more tears !
Plunging Plop Guy
Hi there !
I met my friend on Sunday,the one who used to swap audio tapes with me of our sessions on the toilet and I asked him how he felt about me mentioning any of the things we've done in the past.He said go ahead!So here goes,or one particular buddy dump we once had.
He had suggested that when we next met,we could both shit into a bucket standing back to back and that he looked forward to having his muscled arse against another muscled arse as we dropped our turds into the water in the bucket and felt the communal splashes.
We filled the bucket a third full of water ,pulled down our jeans and pants,stood over it and got on with shitting.It was great to have such a companionable shit and unusual to feel instead of a toilet seat pressing against our arses,it was each other's buttocks we both felt as our turds simultaneously plopped into the water.
It was certainly not dirty as gravity prevented us getting soiled by the shit and it was good to look in the bucket and saw this communality of men's turds.
On my way home,waiting at the railway station,a fit well-muscled guy og about 30 stood near me on the crowded platform wearing tight jeans and who I'd love to have seen and heard on the toilet.As he boarded the train in front of me I noticed the contours of his bumcheeks flexing as he stepped onto the train and thought the idea of him actually having a good long grunt,fart and shit session covering a toilet seat too overwhelming to imagine.It reminded me of how not many years ago,it seemed that every time I went anywhere I'd see young guys wearing jeans with rips in them and I'd look at the often visible "toilet muscle" where it would hang down through the toilet seat and be in the "splashback zone"!I too used to have several pairs of worn jeans and enjoyed the exhibitionist kick of showing off where I sit on toilets.Then,they all disappeared almost.Why?Did everyone suddenly become embarrassed to wear them?Was it a fashion or was it I hoped a reaction to society's pruder! y and a statement of refusal to feel ashamed of having a muscled arse?
The guy on the train was certainly proud of his arse and knew it looked great in such a tight pair of jeans.
This same attitude seems to have also affected the designers of footballers' shorts that look almost as long as the style of the 1930's!Back in the 1980's they looked great and I remember cutting pictures out of the nrewspaper or football magazines,and drawing the outline of a toilet seat on the ones where the player was sitting down and thinking about them on the toilet.The best ones were the team line-ups where there would usually be 4 players at the front sitting crossed-legged on the ground showing of their big well-muscled "sitting on the toilet zones"!!!! Sadly missed.
DAZZ-another great story,the one of your friend seeing you on the toilet and you sharing the details.I LOVE to hear about you getting your bum splashed and how much you enjoy it.It's THE greatest sensation,eh?
Several people have mentioned toilet dreams.I have had quite a few of these but not lately.With me I'm usually in a public toilet which is very public or it would be if anyone else was there but I'm usually there on my own expecting any moment to see someone else come in and sit on a toilet so I can watch.I have often dreamt I was on the toilet having a good shit and all the sensations are there and feeling slightly embarrassed as someone comes in but not anyone "interesting"! I hope the next one is a lot more exciting !
Regarding how to make contact in a toilet so as to chat about or share the experience of a shit with the guy next-door.How about saying something to him through the partition as though you think he's someone else? Such as "I'm having a shit as well,Steve".When he doesn't reply ,say something else or tap on the wall until he says he isn't Steve,(Or maybe he is which could break the ice and help you to feel easy about jojing about the situation!"
Asking for toilet paper only works when there's a gap under the partition,and asking for the time sounds rather contrived,but another way of introducing the topic is to do what I've done-Just comment on the sound of his shit or that you wish you could do one like that etc.Spontaneity is the main thing but best if there's no-one else around so he's less likely to feel inhibited.
I think instinct is the best guide but if there's no reaction,I've always given up but the idea of talking to him like you know him has only just occured to me!
Still not doing big satisfying logs again yet,Like your reference ANNE to a column of water splashing up!I'm going to increase my intake of toot vegetables to see if that helps.I have high fibre cereal,pulses,fruit,cheese,rice and what I would consider the right balance to produce large firm turds but there's obviously a missing ingredient.Most people who have discussed their constipation here have had difficulty in doing a big hard knobbly turd,whereas I have found it hard to shit when the turds were small and slimy,probably because there wasn't enough for the sphincter to work on.
I will get there and be shitting like the rest of you,I'm certainly getting better results than I was but dropping upto 40 individual small turds isn't as good as dropping a few whoppers!!!
Enjoy yourselves! PPG
Good Morning All!!!!
Had my morning poop.........it was 8:05am...still on schedule despite going back to standard time this weekend. This just proves my bowel is ready to empty at the 8am hour!!!!
Buzzy: That would be neat if we pooped the same time everyday.....did the time change affect you?
Had a healthy home cooked meal last night....and boy was my poop ready this morning...it stared to slither it's way out of my arse while I was getting online....so I literally galloped to the bathroom and I no sooner sat down when it popped right out like a cork.....still looked like a healthy brown snake but felt neat the way it came out.
What bliss!!!!!! I really look forward to my morning poops now!!!!
Claudia, I'm sorry to hear of your trauma. When I was 15, I had surgery, and when I woke up from the anesthesia, I could not pee although my bladder was very full. The nurse gave me a jug to try and pee into, but I could not. So she had to give me a Foley catheter (soft plastic tube into the bladder). A male nurse usually takes care of this chore if you're a guy but one was not available and I thought it was a little fun to have a girl nurse do it, and she wanted to do it so I said go ahead. She put some lubricant on it and it did not hurt, it just felt awfully funny. There is a little balloon on the bladder end to keep it in there which they inflate with water, and your pee drains out into a plastic bag. The nurse comes along twice a day and empties the bag into a container and measures it. So I'm like: "How much did I do?" And she goes "40 ounces!" When I was ready to go home, the nurse deflated the baloon, and pulled the tube out. That felt even funnier than when! it was going in.
I also have a hospital poop story. The same young nurse asked me if I moved my bowels the day after the surgery and I said no. The next day she asked again and I said no. So she's like: "I can give you a laxative, or you can just get on the toilet and try to go." So I'm like: "Well, I might be able to go if I got on the toilet." So she helped me out of bed and onto the toilet. I had IV's plus the urinary catheter in place. I sat down slowly and she positioned the IVs and catheter and my dick was sticking WAY up with the tube coming out of it and that was funny. She came back about 30 minutes later to see what I had accomplished. I was reading a magazine while I sat there and left the door open. I had passed a big groaner into the bowl and she looked at it and said: "oh, VERY good!" and wiped my butt for me while I sat on the seat, even though I could have done it myself. The toilet seat had like a big notch in back giving plenty of room for wiping. The notch also! provided room for your tailbone.
Claudia: I was in the hospital for my tonsils. I was three years old.I cried for three straight days. The day to go home, I yelled louder than ever to go home. When my mother came to get me, I told her I had to go to the bathroom. I had to pee. My mother told me to pee on the crib mattress. No nurse would look at me all afternoon.
Fannie: Don't be afraid to use the bathroom at someone's house. Just close and lock the door. If you are afraid of noise, just drop your pants to your thighs, keep your legs closed and that will muffle the noise. I used to release my bowels slowly, then after awhile I would relax and let loose with no noise at all. I had to do that when I visited homes in the south and the West Indies when I was a little girl. On Sunday nights, my parents used to take me to visit my grandparents. After a full dinner, I had to take a crap. Every Sunday night, I had this ritual. So I would excuse myself to the bathroom, lift my dress, slip and lower my pink Sunday School best panties. My bowel movements were painful. I would press out 5 to 8 six inch doo-doo's. They were thick, 1.5 inches Sometimes, I would urinate either in the middle or the end. They would take a long time and I thought they would never stop. My folks would never ask if I was alright. I guess they knew. Then I would grab w! ads of paper and wipe good. Then fix my clothes.
At my cousin's house I was six and I was playing with the boys. I knew I had an attack of diarreah. I raced into the house past the adults, pulling down my coveralls. When I closed the bathroom door, I let down my white panties in a bunch on top of the trousers. I ate lots of plums and prunes earlier in the day. The cramps were murder and thick chunky brown liquid doo-doo just gushed out of my rectun like a geyser. No one was interested in me and I was not missed for an hour.
Tommy:When I was in grammar school and high school sometimes now in a park or at work, I would get a toilet that someone would not flush. So, either I would flush it or find a next. A few times, I would forget to flush at home or if I wanted to leave a trademark in school, I just would not. One afternoon, I went to take urinate before cheerleader practice. My friend Veronica had the bathroom door locked, even though there were three stalls. When she came out, she told me she had a terrible bowel movement and she wanted to be alone. When I went to the last stall, my favorite I found six curved yellow hot dog doo-doo's. I flushed anyway and urinated quickly. Later, I saw her on the squad. She told me she could pee around others but not evacuate her bowels.
Moderator: I like this current cover girl. She reminds me of me in the morning or at work.