Punk Rock Girl
Constipated. Again. It's amazing, when I can't take a shit I feel like I'd give anything to have diarrhea, then when I have diarrhea I would be perfectly happy to never shit again. I'd love to have normal, happy dumps but alas, but guts and ass are out to get me.
As of yesterday morning I had not taken a dump for almost three days. When I woke up I actually felt like I might be able to go. The longest I've ever gone before resorting to laxatives or an enema is five days. Anyway, my husband was in the shower so I knocked and asked if I could use the toilet. As always he said yes, but I feel it's still polite to ask. I went in dropped my shorts and underpants and sat.
I pushed and pushed and pushed and only managed to get out a few pebbles and a dry fart. I felt more in there but it just wouldn't budge. Later in the day I tried again at work, but again only got out a few pebbles.
So, last night on the way home I stopped at the drug store and got an Fleet enema. I got home, hung up my coat, pulled down my pants and underpants and laid on my stomach and squirted the enema up my ass. I laid there on the floor for a little while, before I felt some shifting in my bowels, then suddenly felt that urgent need to go.
I rushed into the bathroom, sat on the toilet and everything came rushing out. It was over in just a few seconds except for a few more squirts and farts afterward. Man did that feel good. Back to my "normal" self again.
Hope everyone else is well and surviving the snow.
(I forget if I'm calling myself Medium-Size Al or Average-Size Al. Either way, it's a play on this gas station pizza thingy back in my hometown called Big Al's. Cause I'm like 5'10 and 175 lbs, so not terribly big or small. Yeah, shut up, I know it's a lame joke)
@teetee: Dunno about public, but at home he and my mom just let em go. We've always been a family that was fairly amused by and casual about farts. We tend to jokingly blame the 'small woodland creatures.'
More FartsOK TeeTee:My Dad Always Farts out in public.One time when I was little,Me and my dad was going in one store,and he farted.Then we went in and then two girls followed in a minute later and one of them says to the other,DID SOMEBODY $HIT!?And in my early teenage years we was at a fleamarket and I smelled something awfull,And Dad said he farted.And My Dad farts alot in the public restrooms when he pees.And one time I was out of town with him and I got in the truck and I farted,And he said I should let it outside.And I told him that there was people around,And he goes,They don't know you!
Eveyone else including TeeTee:When I was 12 I spent the night with my grandma on one summer,I slept on the couch and she just sat in the chair all night without sleeping.I woke up around 9am and she was in the chair and she said she hated letting out those gas poots cause they stank.
Advice for KellyI lacked roughage in my diet for a long time and I can tell you about the bloating and lack of energy that comes from a GI tract that hasn't done a good job in a while, I'm not that good at writing sorry so I'm probably going to give you a step by step and if it helps you feel free to tell me it did =) Anyone else who has issues with frequency or volume this is extreme and not for weak stomachs.
The least invasive and painless way to poop bigger and more frequently by Nick.
1. Cereal grains - Start your day off with a bowl of hot oats and ground flax seed, if you are wondering how to grind flax seed you can use a coffee grinder or a anything with a flat grinder. I personally have a magic bullet™ and it has a flat grinder so I just use that. You can add sugar or honey to taste, I like agave myself =)
2. Presoak a mix of lentils, barley, and lima beans in a bowl for six hours.
Chop some beef and pork.
Add some oil to a pot and braise the beef and pork with the oil.
Discard the soak water and boil the beans and meat in that same pot with some vegetable stock and fresh water for half an hour.
Feel free to add ???? if you wish, I don't add them because I have issues with ????.
It may take a day or two but your GI tract will eventually expedite a large volume of soft well formed fecal matter two or three times through the day.
This combination of soluble and insoluble fibre made me go from pooping maybe every other day in a decent sized volume, to pooping bulky stools twice a day and feeling much better ;)
Stomach BugHey, hope you're all okay, I have a story to share with you! I'm a 21 year old female, 5"9, blonde hair, blue eyes, shapely figure.
I was at work yesterday when I started to feel really yucky. My belly ached and I felt like I needed to fart. I was wearing tight leggings which show off my round butt so I didn't really want to fart in case I got more than I bargained for. My boyfriend has had diarrhea for a few days this week but put it down to him eating something which hadn't agreed with him.
By half eleven I started getting stomach cramps and my need to fart was getting worse. I went to the bathrooms and chose the furthest cubicle from the door. I eased myself onto the seat and took a deep breath before I pushed out a loud wet fart which spluttered at the end. I passed a lot more wet gas, but I couldn't poo properly. I kept pushing but just had more gas. Eventually I stood up and pulled my thong up without wiping. I had a sticky feeling between my bum cheeks but ignored it and went back to work.
I felt very bloated and I kept rubbing my stomach and moaning in pain. My colleague asked me if I was okay. I told her I felt like I was going to have a ???? upset so she took me to the bathroom again. I apologised in advance for the fact it was probably going to be diarrhea. She laughed and told me it was fine as she was actually having the runs at that time anyway, and would probably be going to the toilet shortly for a much needed bowel evacuation. I sat on the cool seat and massaged my bloated aching belly. I eventually managed to produce several small squirts of liquid.
'Ughhh it won't come out' I sighed. 'It will. Once the first bit comes out it'll be like a cork!' she giggled. She was right. 'Ohhhh' I moaned with relief as several waves of runny poo shot through me into the toilet. 'Well done, that'll probably be me in a minute!' she headed into the cubicle next to me and I heard her unzip her trousers. I squeezed out some more runny stuff and kept farting. Next door, she suddenly let go with a huge gush of diarrhea which went on for ages and was almost explosive. 'You okay hun?' I called through the partition. 'Yeah thankyou. I've had it three days now' she replied, pushing out some more sloppy poo. 'Aw how come?'. 'My husband had the norovirus bug..I've got the back end of it I think. Literally' she laughed.
'Oh right. My boyfriend has diarrhea at the moment, I wonder if I've caught it from him' I wondered out loud. 'Probably, infectious diarrhea is really contagious' she told me. Once we both felt a bit emptier, we wiped and went back to work. We had to make three more trips to the ladies room throughout the afternoon and by home time I felt pretty lousy. When I arrived home I found my boyfriend was in the bathroom with his own troubles.
'Are you okay baby?' I asked him. He was sat on the toilet, looking really pale and shaky, and holding his stomach. 'Um I've been having problems with my bowels again' he moaned in pain. 'Still got the runs?' I checked. 'Yeah really badly' he admitted as a rush of runny poo squirted out of his bum. 'Oh bless ya. I think I've caught it too, I've had diarrhea all day' I told him. 'Really?! I'm so sorry, poor you' he looked miserable. 'It's fine baby' I soothed him and rubbed his aching belly.
If anyone wants to hear how we've been feeling over the past day or so, let me know. I've got to dash, I can feel another round of diarrhea wanting out and my boyfriend is sat on the toilet!
Squat position and JedParent-I believe the squat position for eliminating is probably better than sitting on the can itself. But remember if you are living in a country where there are no squat toilets, it may be good to teach them to use the regulate Western style toilet. When they go,to school, they may have trouble getting into a squat position on a regular toilet. Some of the western toilets are high and you don't want them to fall off if they are squatting on the seat. And you definitely don't want them squatting on the floor. I used squat toilets last year when I went to Europe, and I actually prefer them, but keep all this in mind while potty training.
Jed-I also hate having to use a filthy toilet, but that is no excuse to make a bad thing worse. Crapping on the floor was a bad idea. Somebody has to clean that up. At least if it was in the toilet. It would go,down the drain once unclogged. On the floor, someone has to scrape it up and put it in a bag. You should have hovered above the toilet instead, or used a trash can. And then make sure you tell the employees as soon as you came out. Picture yourself having to clean up someone else's dump on the floor. Ick.
Advice for KellyKelly,
My bowels began to slow in my twenties. I was used to eating anything I wanted as a teen and still had a bowel movement everyday. In my twenties I would go more infrequently. I added Fiber One Cereal and Yogurt to my diet for breakfast. My system was used to it within a week. I eat it DAILY, which is the key. I sprinkle the Fiber One on a sweet cereal - about 1/4 to 1/2 cup a day. I eat normal yogurt - not Activia - as a probiotic.
I would discourage other Fiber One products - bars, brownies, sweet cereals, because they are marketed as low calorie. They do have good fiber sources, but their sugar substitutes can upset your stomach. They will give you explosive gas and diarrhea - no lie.
However, the original cereal, if you can get by its bland flavor, will not upset your stomach. I go everyday, with a substantial amount, but it's not overly smelly and I am not in the bathroom a long time. I never feel bloated.
Hope this advice is helpful and not too much information.
Catching PoopWe get them to squat over a bedpan rather than a potty.
To Kung PooThanks, Kung Poo. Do you have kids and if so, did you train them to squat?
Kelly needs helpI think you are suffering from fecal impaction. Google it. My ex gf had the same problem. She had to take enemas. Drink more water and eat fruit.
Strange bathroom experience!The last few days have been physically strenuous for me. I am dieting, I had to go off on a business trip that required a lot of walking, and I guess I was not drinking water like I should have been.
Yesterday I ended up working late, and had just an apple, a banana, and peanuts for lunch. For dinner (at 9 pm, far past my usual time), I had a seafood pasta and two rolls without butter. And I had a salad with vinaigrette dressing. I got to bed very late that night.
The next morning (this morning), I went into the bathroom but was very constipated. Nothing would come out at all! This has happened a couple of times before with pizza, but something would always come out after a couple of minutes. But this time it took me at least 20 to 30 minutes before anything came out! And it was very painful! I couldn't even read; I just sort of sat there, squirming and pushing and trying not to strain. A chunk came out, then a couple more. I wasn't even convinced I was finished, but my legs were falling asleep.
But the strangest part was that when I went to wipe, my hand (through the toilet paper) touched my backside and I could tell that the "hole" was larger than before! It really freaked me out! It was stretched! I did not expect that, and it still is slightly uncomfortable. But I just went to the bathroom and had a good fart, so I guess everything is out for now.
I will try to drink more water, and add some olive oil to the salad, next time. Ouch!
Comments and a response to KellyJed: I probably would have done the same thing if that were me. People are or gross and have no shame in their game.
Melissa K: Wow you must of really had to go. I'm glad your teacher understood your situation.
Parent: Interesting question. I wasn't potty trained to squat to handle my business. I was taught to sit to poop and stand to pee. The times that I have squatted was if I was pooping into a container for fun. To answer your question, I say yea it has it's benefits.
Unknown Dumper: Interesting, it almost as common as someone pooping into a container or toilet. Have I tried it. I may have in the past.
Now my response to Kelly. Yes you can poop bigger and often if you look into your diet. What foods are you eating now, are you staying hydrated with water, are you using supplements? I try to eat healthy by eating lots of fiber rich foods like green vegetables like lettuces, broccoli, kale, collard greens. Beans are good for bulking up and if you like to fart, then eat them. Brown rice with a meal as a starch with your vegetables and meat (if you eat any) are good too. If you're a junk food junkie like me, eating popcorn is also good to help bulk up your stool. Potato chips are good but not as effective as popcorn. A nice big bowl would get things moving in your bowels. Stay away from those sweet drinks that are loaded with high fructose corn syrup, aspartame, and refined sugars. Water is good, of course you're going to run a lot to the bathroom and pee, but it can help loosen the stool and help with bulking. Drink fresh or real fruit juices to help. Metamucil powder made from psyllium husk is good too. That also aid in the bulking of your bowels. Vitamins are good too, especially a multivitamin tablet is good. If you like coffee, caffeine makes the urges for you to go more often. Also green tea is good too, hot or cold. If you can squat, then that my help with having a good bowel movement. Make sure you put some kind of container under you to catch your poop. Those are some of the things that I do to stay healthy and keep regular. I was going to change the Mr. Clogs name, but I'll keep it. It's grown on some people on this site.
That' all for now have a great day. Peace!
Comments and a live poopHey all.
I haven't posted in a while because I have been busy but I have been reading and enjoying all the new stories.
Thanks to @Mr. Clogs for the shout out and the new story.
@Anonymous Guy, yeah i've been busy so that's why I haven't posted in a while. I'm glad you liked it as I don't think it was that well written so that's good to know. Hope you like the new stories.
@Rylee, Thanks for your comments and I enjoyed your latest story. Sounds like a very nice experience and keep it coming.
I think that's all the responses, sorry if I left anyone out.
First off I am going to do another live post and if that doesn't go on too long I will share a college pooping story.
As I write this I have been letting out strong smelling farts and I can feel a load pushing down towards my hole. I had a small urge earlier but I had to go out for a while so I ignored it but now its time to head to the bathroom.
I am sitting on the toilet now with my trousers and boxers at my ankles.
There is pressure on my hole and I know that as soon as I relax the load will begin to push its way out.
I enjoy holding it back for a minute before unclenching my muscles.
I am relaxing now and I can feel the tip beginning to poke through.
My hole is slowly stretching now.
It feels like a wide log.
There is crackling noises now and soft farts as the log comes out.
Its soft but formed and feels so good coming out.
Some is breaking off and splashing into the toilet but it is still coming out.
More sloppy farts now and my insides are pushing the end of the first wave out.
I can feel more inside.
Just let out a loud fart and can feel my hole opening again.
A wider log is crackling its way out now.
Its stretching my hole nicely and seems to be very long.
Just pushed the end of it out and letting out some pee now.
There might be more so going to push.
Pushing hard nothing coming yet. A small amount of soft poop came out.
I think there is a bit more so pushing again.
Just ripped out a fart but I can feel some movement.
Pushing again but just letting out lots of very messy sounding farts.
Maybe that's all but I can feel that something else needs to come out.
I think I will leave it for now though as I have been pushing very hard for the last few minutes.
It took six wipes to get cleaned up.
Flushing the toilet and going to wash my hands.
Leaving the bathroom now, it smells very bad in there.
That's all for now.
I will share my college poop story in my next post
Take care all,
comments & stuffTo: Melissa K it sounds like you really had to poop bad I bet you felt great after.
To: Kelly fruit juice, laxative or enema my opion.
To: HGBF it sounds like she took the dump from hell I bet she felt great after.
To: Bonnie it sounds like you and Jill had an interesting and fun time.
Sincerly Brandon T
PS I love this site
to KellyIt sounds like you are at least somewhat constipated. More fiber might be of help to you. For the most part, fiber is fiber, and it doesn't matter much what kind you get. However, some foods have more concentrated fiber, so it's easier to get enough. Brown rice, whole wheat and other whole grain cereals, bran cereals, and similar products often have quite a bit of fiber, as have certain fruits and vegetables. If you make sure to have some portions of all of these every day, you should get enough fiber to stoke up your bowels so they can move.
Fiber isn't the only factor, though. You should drink plenty of water, especially if you are taking in more fiber, or it can just get stuck in there. Also, you should get some exercise every day, even if it is just a good walk or climbing stairs; I have found gardening to be excellent, with its digging, pulling, reaching and other motions.
A third element is timing, which includes trying to have some time sitting on the toilet every day, preferably at the same time of day, so you can start to establish a habit of defecating. Take a book or magazine and allow yourself ten or fifteen minutes of just sitting to see if you can move your bowels; of course, you can give a gentle push from time to time, so long as you don't strain too much. But a definite time to sit--right after breakfast, for example--can help let your bowels know what is expected, and it might help them to become more regular.
Let us know your progress!
To TylerTyler, do you mean me? If so, I suppose I do have a few other stories I could share.
Friday, February 15, 2013
surveyingi love this site just surveying dont have many stories i consider interesting to share lately unfortunatly
1. Could you give a brief description of yourself? female 6ft brunnette big built
2.How often do you take a poop?
once a day at least
3.About how large are your poops on average? (length,width)
massive sometimes foot long
4.About how many turds do you let out when you take a poop?
varies sometimes just 1 0r 2 but often 10 or more
5.What type of texture do your poops turn out to be in general?
6.What form do your poops usually come out as? logs mainly
7.About how long does it take for you to poop?
i take my time usally around 20 min at least
8.Is there a particular time of day when you normally poop?
like to after work but i go when i have to wherever i am
9.Is there a particular time or place you like to poop?(home,public restroom, etc)
prefer to at home, but i use public ones when i need t i dont mind, you gotta go when you gotta go right
10.Overall, do you like pooping?
yes very much
11.How do you feel about others listening to or watching you poop or vice versa?
dosent bother me we all do it
12.How long do you usually hold your poop in?
i cant hold it very long usually
13.What foods do you usually eat?
try to eat more healthy these days but i love takeaways
14.Are there any foods you eat that make you produce large poops?
seems most stuff does pizza makes me do very big ones
15.What is your favorite (if any) type of poop to let out?
big ones that take a while coming out so i can enjoy the feeling, but i hate diarrhoea
I Think I'll Keep This PottyUserName//Take Survey At End...I've posted under two names here in the past.
The first one was Cinquain--which is a favorite poetry form of mine that was invented by a lady whose last name is ????.
The second one was Princess Of AJville. I liked that one even better than the first one, but, according to my interpretation of the TOS (that says we must all remain anonymous--though I personally don't care who knows I'm here and whatever business I decide to post), this might end up causing me problems later to where I would have to change my handle after it gets more established here.
Therefore, from now on, I'm going to be known as P-Princess with the first P standing for quite a number of things such as Pee, Poop, Potty, Pampered, Poetry, Prose. Princess, of course, is simply that: Princess. I descended from European royalty and know how to live as a Princess whether I'm Prospering or Poor.
At this time, I'm more than a little Porky, too, though working at Parting with several of my Plus Pounds.
Anyway, the PottyUserName fits, so P-Princess it will be from now on...
So, what does P-Princess have to report this fine morning?
For one thing, I'm going to excuse myself to go pee. I could do this in my granny panties, but I would rather deposit it in a more conventional place, so brb...
I'm back, but I did more than go to pee. No, I didn't poop, but I did decide to building a future poop with a nice, hearty breakfast. ????!!!
For starters, it's been quite awhile since I posted and/or responded to other posts here, even though I've been reading, so I have a lot of catching up to do.
I'm not sure if I posted anything since getting released from the hospital in early June of 2009. It was there that I was officially diagnosed with lymphedema as well as with a MRSA related to complications of the same.
As you might imagine, I have quite a few peeing and pooping stories to share from my hospital stay, and I'll be sharing those with you in a day or so.
I also have experienced some changes in both bladder and bowel habits that are, I believe, lymphedema-related to a degree.
I plan on keeping these stories as entertaining as I can make them while still educating and informing.
Right now, however, I'm going to share a couple of blog entries with you that were posted within a couple of days of each other with nothing in-between (in that particular blog).
I'll start with the one I came up with (but, still in draft form) earlier this morning:
Este Tiempe, Numero Uno...
What I Wrote:
"Sometimes, I wish my computer chair were a nice, comfortable toilet seat at the ready whenever I had to pee!"
which served to remind me that I had posted this one for my next-to-last entry:
Reflecting On A Very Recent And Memorable Bowel Movement
What I Wrote:
"Occasionally after a bowel movement, I'll take a look to see what I've just deposited, and this was one of those times...Like WOW!!!
What can I say!?!
Would I be exaggerating too much to say that it would totally circle the planet if placed along the latitude of The Equator!?!
How about if I would take it a step further to say that, even then, there would be enough left over to tie it into a bow!?!
I confess that I DID exaggerate a bit in my description of it--but not by much..."
Here's the reason why the last blog-entry (the one about peeing) is still in draft form:
It's because I haven't finished including everything on the page that I hope to.
One of the things I'm including is a link to the home page of toiletstool.
If anyone reading and posting in this forum hasn't noticed it, I would advise you to check it out, as it has all sorts of information pertaining to everything from plumbing to health issues.
If someone making it over to toiletstool--and, then, checking out the toilet forum--were to ask me if I were P-Princess, would it be a good idea for me to respond with something like "That's for me to know and you to guess!" in order to keep things "officially" anonymous?
Frankly, I've seen more of the original "rules" more broken around here than the contents of a carton of eggs dropped to the sidewalk from the top of The Empire State Building, but I'll try to behave.
As for the writings of others in the forum, you can be sure that I won't be sharing them in any of my blogs and other writings beyond talking about something in general such as saying that I think it's very harmful for parents, teachers, babysitters, other guardians to make kids hold it until they get home from shopping and, then, punish them when they're unable to.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to being a more "regular" contributor here, and, before I sign off, I would like to share a survey. I hope to get lots of you answering it...
1. I was eleven years old the year The Beatles came to the USA. One account I read said that there had been at least one time when fans would sneak into their hotel room and hide behind the shower curtain. It didn't say whether or not any of the guys went to the bathroom during that time before they were aware that they were being watched. Have you--or anyone you know--ever done something like this with some actor/actress, recording artist, group, political figure, newscaster, athlete, etc. and did you/someone you know end up catching them doing one or more of the following: peeing, pooping, passing gas, and/or throwing up? Share it here, please!
2. What's the longest, unbroken snake of poop you've ever seen?
3. Have you or someone you know ever had your poop colored a strange color (for poop) by something you've eaten? I know that I've actually had blue poop after eating blue-raspberry-flavored popcorn; white poop with a light-greenish tint after eating mashed potatoes for three meals; and poop that actually looked like carrots in color after eating mostly carrots during a 24 hour period. Describe what you ate and details about your poop.
4. Several years ago, I had a very thorough body cleanse using natural herbs that lasted for several weeks. During that time, the gas I passed, my poop, my pee, and my sweat all took on this pleasant scent that was both floral and fruity. Has anything like that even happened to you? Details, please!
5. Is your schedule to where you can pretty much go to the bathroom when you feel like it? or Must you go or not go according to your schedule? Describe your experience.
6. Where's the most unusual place you've ever peed or pooped? When I was around four, I had to pee when my family and I were out in a row boat. There was an empty coffee can on the boat (probably had been used at one time to hold worms during a fishing expedition), so I sat on it and peed into it. One of the grown-ups took the can and put it out on the river so that it floated along transporting my pee. I was told that it would probably be floating by on the Ohio River when my folks and I crossed the bridge there on our way back home the next day. When we crossed the bridge, my folks both said they saw it float by. I didn't, but I didn't have any reason back then to believe that they didn't really see it.
7. What's the biggest pee puddle you've ever made? Mine--after sitting around with a friend at this restaurant drinking iced tea--stretched out to be about three or more feet long and close to two feet wide. I made the deposit in a deserted parking lot.
That's all for now. Will write again soon...
Ryan- Welcome to the site! Thought I'd do your survey;
1. What is the average size of your big poops? To be honest I don't really know! Often they end up hidden under other turds or under water or whatever, but I guess the biggest ones are a couple of inches diameter and ten or so inches long.
2. How often do you poop to make such big dumps? I go every couple of days usually, sometimes less often and occasionally more at the weekend.
3. What color are these dumps and what texture are they? They vary from soft to firm and are usually normal brown in colour!
4. What is your load like? A combination of long and short logs with some little pieces at the end quite often!
5. What do you (normally) eat that would allow you to poop so big? Nothing special, it just builds up!
6. Do you pass gas/fart when you poop? Yes. and before and during most times, I will fart while pooing and usually fart while waiting to go too.
7. Have you ever watched yourself poop in the mirror, taken a picture or video of yourself "in the act", or let someone watch you push out a mega dump? Nope! A couple of friends have seen me poo but they were only regular-sized ones!
8. Do you enjoy listening to others poop at home or in public and do you generally poop in public or at home? I do like listening to others going, and I do go in public quite a lot at university, while shopping etc.
9. What is your age and gender? Female and 21
Today I had to go for a poo while I was out at uni. I had an hour between lectures so I went for lunch in the uni cafe and while I was eating I started to need a poo. I hadn't been since the weekend so it was quite a big one. The toilets near the cafe were quite busy. All three cubicles were in use and a girl about my age and a woman of about 30 were queuing to use them. I joined them. Almost immediately one cubicle opened, and the girl went in leaving the woman in front of me. A couple of minutes later the other two cubicles opened and we both went in with the woman on my right. She started tearing off paper to line the seat and I sat down with my jeans and pink knickers around my ankles. As she lined the seat and then pulled down her trousers and purple knickers to her feet I heard her let out a fart so I guessed she needed a poo as well. I understand why you'd line the seat but by the time she sat down I had been sitting on the loo for nearly two minutes already! Do any of you on here who line the seat still do it when you are desperate to go, or only if you don't need to go that bad?
I finished my wee as she sat down and my first turd, which had been working its way out, dropped. Unlike me the woman started pooing right away without weeing first. I heard two plops from her cubicle. I did a second turd too, longer than the first one. The other girl, in the cubicle on the other side of the woman, left, having just weed, and someone else came in straight away and replaced her.
I did another piece and a fart slipped out too. As my fourth turd was starting to come out the woman let another two pieces drop. My fourth came out not long after, then we both did a fifth. She was done then and started wiping, but I had a bit more, doing two more turds before I was done. Of course, I felt much lighter afterwards!
Valentines Hearts with a side of Mexican Farts & PoopHappy Valentines day everyone,
I just got through listening to Evelyn taking a valentines day poop.
I was sitting here browsing my facebook page, when the notorious car horn sounded from Evelyn's car alarm being armed. I confirmed it by looking out the window, just as I heard her taking heavy steps (She wears construction boots to work because she is some sort or engineer) up the stairt to her apartment. All the while she was talking on the phone to somebody. It must have been family or a friend because she was speaking spanish.
I raced to take up position in the master bathroom, hoping to beat her there of which I did. I heard her enter and lift up the lid on the toilet seat and settle in.
Just after she settled there was a sharp "toot" with that resemblence of a fart, then she started peeing. She talked for a few and said her goodbyes but remained on the toilet for a while after she stopped talking. There were a few more faint fart sounds and one faint plop.
She wrapped up her valentines day gift for the toilet with 3 separate pulls of toilet paper off the roll. then she flushed and washed her hands.
I left my bathroom wishing I could catch a whiff of what she did.
Happy valentines day to all, eat well & poop big tomorrow...or tonight
Hello again, folks.
I see you may have read my first post. The events that happened to me were true. Here's what happened to me when I was about 13 or 14.
I was sitting on the can with my garments at my knees when I was stuck with no toilet paper. It made me rather late for assembly so one of the teachers had to get me some more squares.
I know it's embarrasing, but hey, we've all been through that same sitch before.
Wasn't sure what to do...Me and my friends went to Mcdonalds the other day. We ate and hung out there for a while to avoid the heat. After a while the double quarter pounder I ate was making me have to take a bad shit. I told my friends I was going to the bathroom to poop which was hilarious to us, since were 16 year olds. I went into the mens room and it was one urinal and one stall, the bathroom was empty. I went to the stall and locked the door. I turned around and saw the toilet and it was disgusting: There was piss and toilet paper all over the seat and a load of chunky vomit in the toilet with some poop stained toilet paper around the side. I have never seen a more disgusting sight. I was going to just leave but I really had to poop and my stomach hurt. I looked around and since it was a handicap stall being the only one it was big. I went up to the corner of the stall and took my pants completely off. I leaned my back on the corner of the wall and slid down into an air-sitting position. I spread my legs out wide and gave a little push, and my poop fell splat onto the floor. It felt good but I knew I wasnt done. I pushed a little harder and more poop landed in the pile with a thud. A few more pushes and I felt 10 pounds lighter. I looked and saw I shit a lot, like more than usual. At least a foot and a half worth, which is pretty good for a skinny 16 year old. I went to the toilet paper dispenser but the whole thing was soaked in puke, so I pulled up my pants and left without wiping.
Has anyone ever seen a bathroom like this? What do you do in that situation, when you really really have to go and cant wait? Is what I did wrong? It was already nasty anyway.
farting in class :)To all who were wondering - I think my toilet just got damaged over time and couldn't handle my massive turds anymore! And yes my family does have a toilet snake that we just never knew about. I've been trying to do my business at lunch at school whenever possible to avoid clogging more toilets at my house. I couldn't care less whether I break the school's toilets. They have a ton of them.
I held in my poo for the whole weekend a few days ago so I wouldn't poo at our house. At school today (Monday) I wanted to go at lunch. My bowels did not agree with my decision. In second period I got all bloated, and quietly tried to pass gas, but I ended up letting out a loud fart. In the middle of class. So of course I was really embarrassed, but all my friends thought it was funny and we all started laughing. Our teacher (shes pretty nasty) just glared at me. It smelled quite a bit, too. So by this point I was just dying to go, but I thought I could hold on until lunch. I let another silent fart go that didn't smell much. Then I got a cramp and tried to hold my butt shut, but a loud and splattering fart came out of my bum. I was mortified and my cheeks burned red. The teacher came over and said, "Melissa, do you need to use the restroom?" so I said yes and started walking out and farting more and more.
When I got to the bathroom, I sat down, lowered my panties and started pooping. My anus domed outwards as the beginnings of a huge, curling turd slid out. Some other girl walked in at this point, and I tried to keep quiet, but eventually I just couldnt hold it back and I had an overwhelming urge to just get rid of it all. I pushed, and crackling turds fell out of my butt one after another till the toilet was full. I wiped my bum and flushed and the turds went down but left massive brown marks on the side of the toilet. After class the teacher pulled me aside and said she didn't appreciate my act in class and that I need to learn manners (cause she thought i was farting on purpose). I said im sorry but i just had to go to the bathroom and i couldnt hold it in. She believed me and let me go. Wow though what a day!
Love, Melissa :)
Advice Please?: Need to Poop Bigger and More OftenI'm a girl in my mid-20's, living at home with my parents for now. Not sure I exactly fit the definition of constipated, but I poop maybe every other day at most, for the most part. I don't poop very much each time and tend towards the long log of balls stuck together type poop, which is why I think maybe I should be taking fiber, to being able to poop more and more often, which I'm sure is better for my body, but I'm not sure what kind I should be taking. I know half my family only poops once a week, so I guess I got the lucky side of my genetics, but it would be great if I could go a decent amount every day or so and make sure my system is really clean and healthy. I don't tend to eat very much, so I'm guessing it's somewhat a what goes in, must come out problem. I'd ask someone in my family for help/advice, but we're not the sort of family that talks about that kind of thing, and I wish we were, it would make things easier. Sometimes I can hear someone struggling to poop in our bathroom, so I know I'm not the only one who has occasional problems, but I don't dare bring it up.
Right now, and especially last night, I've had a full, tight feeling in my stomach/pelvic area and a bit of achiness, and I thought I'd be able to poop today, but wasn't able to get anything to want to come out, even though I got the urge, even with a couple of cups of coffee, which is usually when I'm able to poop, and often the only time I get the urge at all. I'm pretty sure I pooped the day before yesterday, but now I can't remember. I've also been thinking about getting some Fleet glycerin suppositories to help when it gets to the point where there's a large amount in my rectum and I can't push it out no matter what,as those are supposed to help with that I think. I've had that problem a few times. Any advice/comments are very appreciated. Thank you.
I had an interesting experience yesterday. I had to ride the school bus home because my friend Sandro was sick. I hate riding the bus. Anyway, i had a lot of gas from that extra helping of rice and beans I had for lunch. I knew that this ride home was gonna be hard. As soon as I got on the bus I went all the way to the back where not many people sit. I wanted to be alone so i could break wind in peace. I already felt a strong urge to fart coming on. The bus took off and I let loose. It was a long PHHHHHHHTTTTT. It smelled pretty raunchy. I opened the window above my seat so that some of the stink would blow out the window and not suffocate everyone on the bus. A couple miles later, i had to fart again. I relaxed and pushed it out. This is what I heard: PHTTTT,PHT,SPLAT! Uh oh, I thought. That splat did not sound good. It sounded like some caca came out. I sat for the rest of the bus ride fearing that I had just shit myself in front of everyone. Finally, the bus got to my stop. I nervously walked down the isle to the door fearing that everyone could smell my accident. But no one said anything. When i got in my house, I checked my underwear for caca but only found the usual brownish skidmarks. Boy was I relieved. I hope to have more stories soon.
Hi Parent, many kids in Asia grow up squatting when they poop so if you asked me,training your kids to squat is quite common.
comments & stuffTo Little Mandi and Megan great pee stories.
To: Greg great story about hearing S pooping it sounds like she really had to go.
To: Mishy first welcome to the site and great story it sounds like you had a really great poop and felt really great afterwards to and please post anymore stories you may have thanks.
Well thats all for now.
Sincerly Brandon T
PS. I love this site