Here are 2 short stories for you guys. Sunday I was talking on the phone with my friend when suddenly I had to go pee. I didn't have to go bad so I just ignored it and actually forgot about it. A little while later I hung up with my friend and when I got up to hang up the phone the urge hit me hard and I had to go really bad.Now I was watching some of the Nadal Federer tennis match that was on and I didn't want to miss anything so I sat back down on the couch and kept watching. The urge got worse and worse and I was starting to get those pains in my stomach. Still ignored it and kept watching the match. I was squirming around like crazy and my stomach was hurting but I still didn't move. Finally a commercial came. I got up and ran up to the bathroom ripped down my pants sat on the toilet and peed a river.It felt so good. I wiped and flushed and came back downstairs to watch more of the match.
Last night I was over my grandpops house and after dinner I was feeling a little sick to my stomach. Probably because I ate a lot. So I was laying on the floor watching TV and my stomach just felt bloated and crampy. I was a little gassy too letting out a few stinky farts and some burps. When I got home I had to go pee so I went to the bathroom and peed. A few minutes later I had to go poop so I went back upstairs and sat on the toilet again and gave a slight push and a fart came out then the poop started coming out slowly and it hurt a little. I stopped it for a second then pushed slightly again and it dropped in the bowl a few more small sticky logs came out. I felt more in there so I sat there a few more minutes and gave a big push but couldn't get anything else out so I started to wipe.It was really messy to wipe and took like forever for me to get completely cleaned up. Finally I did and flushed and was about to get in the shower when I had to sit on the toilet again. I gave a push and a really tiny poop came out and that was it. Even that was messy to wipe. I flushed that and got in the shower.
Monday, February 02, 2009
The Black Flame
Greetings. I have been avidly reading random posts when I can, and I must say that many of my favorite posts were written by Carmalita. Is she still around. If so, please post something, anything! Her posts remind me of my own childhood.
I have always produced monster turds, pan busters as people in the UK would call them. I only poop about twice a week, sometimes once, and when it happens the log is absolutely massive. I don't believe that something half as big around as a soda can could come out of such a small hole! I occasionally experience pain when my anus gets stretched beyond capacity. Anyway, I clogged the toilet about 75% of the time, and it usually really annoyed my mother. I almost always plunged before even trying to flush, but occasionally I would fail to realize the toilet was clogged or just forget, and I sometimes caught hell for it. A few times I was told to "chop it up" before flushing, but the prospect revolted me and I never tried it. Fortunately, the toilets at college are very strong and I almost never clog them. Have a fabulous day everybody, and keep up the great posts. Carmalita, please come back.
The Black Flame
My daughter goes to a public school. There are about 50 children in her class. In the girls bathroom are 3 stalls with no doors and 2 sinks. My daughter came home home crying and said she had been suspended. Apparently girls have been making fun of her for taking to long to pee. While out on the playground she really had to go so she rushed in to the bathroom only the girls who always harass her were in there and threatened her. she went back out to the playground not wanting to tell her teacher she continued playing with her friends. Eventually she could not hold it any longer and went over by the jungle gym squatted down and pulled her panties to the side and peed in the grass as discretely as she could. Well one of the other girls runs up and tells the teacher and here I am With a upsetdaughter suspended for 3 days. I talked to my daughter who told me kids pee on the playground all the time to avoid teasing and being beaten up.
Whats a parent to do? Should I punish her? I grew up on a farm so if I had to pee I just popped a squat discretely.
Recently I have tried peeing outside, which i found a lot of fun! The first time was when I went for a hike with my family - I don't really enjoy hiking, and this time didn't really make me like it more. We went on a 1 hour hike that turned out to take like 3 hours! After a while I realized I really had to pee. So I let everyone get ahead of me so I couldn't see anyone. I was a bit nervous that someone would show up but I was desperate! I pulled down my athletic shorts and panties and peed on the side of the trail. Luckily I managed not to pee on my shoes. I kicked dirt over it, caught up, and nobody knew what happened!
I decided to try it again one day. I was babysitting my brother but he was really old enough to take care of himself. Once it got dark outside I went into our backyard and peed in a flowerbed.
I also peed on a visit to my grandparents' house. They had a bunch of bushes that made a kind of tunnel, and I squatted down and peed in there.
Peeing outside is really fun, I think everyone should try it! I have not tried pooping outside but hope to in the future.
I'm a high school freshman who posted last month about being in a desperate sitaution when several of the girls bathrooms were locked at my school and I had to use the boys bathroom for the first time. It was a messy crap and the first time I've had to use a boys bathtroom (OK, the 2nd if you count about 5 years ago when me and my friend were riding our bikes in the park and we peed in the boys bathroom, but we won't talk about that!)
We'll Friday I had another experience I guess I should tell you about. I had tried to pee during the passing period before my last class, but the place was packed. Even the 2 handicapped stalls and the one open stall were occupied, so I had no choice but to hold it and go and take my 8th hour test. The exam took me most of the hour and in the last 5 minutes of the period I was done and offsetting the pain by thinking how close I was (right across the hall) from the restroom and relief before I went to music practice. I remembered peeing after 4th hour and that pee didn't get interrupted with the warning bell ringing and me having to run for class. I guess I pee more in cold weather.
My bookbag was already on my shoulder and I was the second student out of the room. About that time (it might have been me standing up for the run) but I could feel a couple of trickles of pee in my underwear. It looked like luckily all 20-some stall doors were open. It was a cloudy day and the lights were off so it was half dark, but I tossed my bag against the wall, and headed into the closest stall. I quickly scanned pee, a rather large crap and a tampon in the bowl, but that didn't deter me this time. Since I don't wear a belt on my jeans I figured I was like 5 seconds from being seated, but I had an unusually tough time fumbling with the brass button on the front of my jeans. I could feel more tickles of pee in my underwear as my thumbnail broke off because I was paniking with the button. After a few more seconds, I got to thinking that I might be able to rip my jeans straight down my legs (it has worked with my pajamas when I have to pee in the middle of the night!), but I couldn't quite get them over my hips. As I worked harder I finally got the button through the hole and I dropped hard onto the seat, but I was unable to get my underwear totally dropped before the gush hit. There was pee over the front of the bowl, on the right front of the seat and of course my underwear was soaked when I finally pulled them down far enough so I could feel my butt on the seat.
My expensive jeans (which I had bought from my babysitting money) didn't get wet, probably because I had yanked them all the way to the floor fast enough) but my underwear was soaked. My pee stream, which seemed rather painful, continued for about 90 seconds, but I sat a little longer on the cold seat alternating between crying and thinking about the cleanup. While seated, I completely took my jeans off and found that they survived. I carefully peeled off my soaked underwear and placed it on the floor. I completely wiped the urine off my body and then stood and wiped the front of the seat. I sat back down on what clearly seemed like a cold seat to me (I guess I expected my experience would have warmed it up) and I pulled up my jeans. I was upset and momentarily considered throwing my underwear into the bowl because the bowl probably wouldn't have flushed anyway, but I took it outside and found all 4 transhcans were pretty much jammed. I worked for a few seconds to hide it among the clutter. Then I left for pep band practice and 90 minutes of practicing the Tony Orlando Songbook. After practice, I took advantage of our 10-minute break to go in and try to pee (I did have to go some) before we marched over to the gym for the basketball game performance.
And here are my answers for Merrilee's survey for babysitters:
1. At what age do you first remember using a public toilet? I was about 3 and terrified.
2. Were you alone? With a friend or parent? I was with my mom.
3. What were you taught to do in such a situation? Wipe the seat? Paper it? Go standing up? Sit right down? Mom would offer me a boost up and I would sit right on the toilet.
4. Did you ever have an accident such as forgetting to drop the seat? Stool overflowing? Person barging in on you? Once when I was like 7, I was crapping at an amusement park and it was a difficult crap to get out and because I was moving around so much, the seat broke off and I partially fell into the bowl, but I didn't get hurt. My mom remembers that I cried more than anything else.
5. At what age and at what type of place were you allowed to go in on your own without parent supervision. At a gas station just before my first day of kindergarten. Mom said it was a "test". I passed!
6. Were there problems created when you were very young and out with a person of the opposite gender and you needed to use the bathroom in a large place? How did they handle it? I remember dad taking me into the mens room a few times. It was gross, so I just learned to hold it and I made an excuse about wanting to go back home early.
7. If you do or have babysat or caree for a young child of the opposite gender, how do you handle their need to use a public bathroom? That was a problem I had to deal with last summer with a 5 year old I care for. It was frustrating for me to take him into a stall in the ladies room, lift the seat for him and then let him pee on his own. He would still spash his pee all over the place. It was gross. I held his organ once to demonstrate and he got a lot better with it on his own when I started to offer him a no-splash award. Now he's awesome!
8. Has an adult ever been critical of your actions as described above? His mom complimented what I did. She was worried that he might try and take advantage of such a situation when I had him. He has a tendancy of wanting to show off.
Hello everybody, Mr. Clogs back with a post to share. This quick post is for the fans of peeing this one you, check it out.
I got off the train station bursting to pee, I just got my rail pass for next month and I knew the waiting area was closed which the bathrooms are. Anyways I have these blue transparent plastic bottles that I keep in the truck if I need to go to the bathroom in them. I got to my truck already aggravated because somebody scratched their car paint onto mine. I got one of my "pee-pee" bottle and go into the drivers side to make some pee-pee into it. I unbuckled my belt, unzipped my pants and pull the fly down on my underwear and put the bottle up to my penis and let loose into the bottle. I peed about a quarter full of the bottle and screwed the lid back on it and stuffed the nasty bottle.
Later on that night, I had to pee and was too lazy to go to the toilet to pee. I had some room for some more pee in the bottle. I unscrewed the lid and peed into the bottle but filling up the bottle. I screwed the lid back on and went back to sleep.
Hello. This is my first post although I have been reading this messageboard for quite a while now. I'm not a native English speaker, so please excuse any mistakes I may make.
Anybody who's interested in male pee desperation will probably like this story.
It's about my boyfriend, a 24-year old tall, slender and quite good-looking guy. This coming week I have an interview for a research position at a university, which is quite far away from where we live in an area I'm not familiar with. So my boyfriend and I thought it would be a good idea to take a trip down there so that I could actually familiarize myself with how to get there, the local area, how long it would take me to commute etc. etc. so that I don't have to deal with all those on the day of the interview. The idea was to take the bus from home to the closest train station that had connection with the area the university is in, then take the train there and finally take the local bus which would take us to the final destination. Sounds like a real hussle but it's actually a 50-minute commute or so, so not that bad.
Anyway, when we got to the train station we found out that it would be closed for the day, so we actually had to take another bus there. And because none of us was familiar with the area, we took the bus from the opposite direction than where we were supposed to and ended up waiting in the cold for 1/2 hour for the right bus to come to take us to the university. So what was supposed to take 50 minutes or so took us almost 2 hours. We finally found our destination, took a short walk around there and decided to make our way back because it was getting dark and it was freezing.
On our way to the bus stop (no trains to home, remember?), my boyfriend said that he had to pee and that if it wasn't so freezing cold he would consider going to the bushes to relieve himself. I thought he was kidding about the bushes as I didn't think he had to go bad. After a while we got into the bus that would take us home. In the beginning he was fine but after a while he looked quite distressed. I asked him if he was ok and he said that his need to pee was becoming worse but that he'd make it home ok. The bus home took almost another hour, and by the end of the journey my boyfriend was in real anxiety. He kept fidgeting and squirming around his seat, although he refused to hold himself in public, and kept saying that it was getting worse and worse and that he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to make it home. He would also breathe heavily every time the bus would go over a bump as it made his desperation worse and looked like he was in real pain.
We finally reached our bus stop which luckily is only a 2-minute walk to our house. Needless to say, we almost ran to the house. While he was reaching out for his keys and while unlocking the door he was doing quite a wild pee-pee dance (I've never seen him so desperate before) and this time he was holding himself with one hand, as there were no people passing by so he wasn't shy to do it. As we finally made it into the apartment, he threw his coat on the sofa and made a b-line to the bathroom, already undoing his zipper on his way there. I naturally followed him as I have an interest in these things and didn't want to miss such a good pee. And I was justified. He stood over the bowl and just let it all go out not even making an effort to direct his piss into the bowl. His pee was strong, hard and loud, flowing uncontrollably out of his penis and he had his eyes closed sighing with relief.
He was peeing for a good minute or two before his stream started dying down, and in the end he said he had been needing it badly and he was feeling much better now (although he then had to clean all the parts where his pee had gone, but he didn't care too much, haha). I thought it was just an amazing thing to watch - and really hot too, so you can easily imagine what followed after that ;-)
Hope you enjoyed my story. Please post more pee stories :-)
Have any of you over-indulged at a Super Bowl party and as a result had your own pooper bowl party the next day? Please tell us your stories.
Here is a strange pee story.
My 15 year old cousin came one summer to stay with when his parents went away for a 1 month vacation. I was a year younger. He slept in the other bed in my room. The first morning he was there, as usual, I got up and went to the bathroom for my usual 1 minute morning pee. I always pissed a lot then. I usually woke up with a lot of bladder pain. I had my shower and went back in the room. My cousin was just waking up. As I got dressed he got out of bed and put on his clothes also. We left the room together and went down stairs to eat breakfast. After breakfast we went on our bikes to go and play in the woods, climbing trees, wrestling around, and all things that boys do at that age. I thought it was really strange that all this time after getting up my cousin had not gone to the bathroom to take his morning pee. We went back home. My dad was at work and my mom was out shopping. She had left lunch for us to eat. We drank a lot of lemonade. We both had two large glasses. By that time I had to pee really bad and went up stairs to the bathroom. He came with me. I always had trouble going when anyone was around. But my bladder was so full that I pissed up a storm with him watching. Finally my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him why had not peed yet today. He told me he never went in the morning. When he was in school he waited until he got home. That meant that he held his pee for 16 hours since the night before. He said he could use a good pee right then. It was 1 0'clock. He hadn't peed for 13 hours. He told me I could watch him piss. So I stood there while he unzipped and took out his penis. It was circumcised just like mine. He waited and waited. Finally his pee started to flow. He must have gone for more than 2 minutes. I said wow, you must have a big bladder. He said so does my dad. Like him I only pee twice a day, afternoon and at bed time. I was amazed.
Hello...just lurking here checking out the posted stories. I just saw the poll about women who squat when having BM's. I can't even do that because I'm so used to sitting on the camode to push out logs, the typical stance of most western world people. However, I learned a long time ago that in France, people of both genders will stand on top of the toilet to have BM's because some doctors were recommending squatting as the best way to move your bowels. In fact, in Asian, European, and African countries, as well as rural parts of South America, squat toilets (indoors and outdoors) are pretty common. It is interesting how different cultures will place varying emphasis on how to approach the same things in varying ways. My educated guess is that, at least, 85%, or so, of people where there is a squat toilet will hover compared to roughly 75% of people in nations without squat toilets. What do you think about this? By the way, the average male will sit on the toilet for BM's wherever they are (Private and Public), with very few squatting (unless you go to rural India, for instance). Well, enjoy and stay healthy!!!
The other day I went into the bathroom at work to pee and I noticed that the first stall was occupied. I went into the second stall and as I sat down I could hear the woman inthe first stall tearing off toilet paper. Then before she started to wipe I heard a couple of tiny poops drop into the toilet with soft plops. I noticed there was a slight poop smell in the air throughout the bathroom and I wondered how long she had been in there and how many other turds she'd let out before I came in.
Then this afternoon I let go of the remains of an excellent dinner I'd had last night. The meal left me satisfied going in and so it was no surprise that my butt felt nice and full this afternoon. I was also getting little stomach cramps and passing little stinky farts. As soon as I sat down, the poop stretched my anus and most of it broke off right away with a healthy splash. There was a little left hanging out of my butt and a few seconds later it fell out, plop plop. I peed, wiped and flushed feeling good and empty!
Hi i'm marly, i've been reading for a long time, but never posted. i'm a guy, 22, tall, average weight, longish hair. I work a professional job and manage a few ppl under me, but that's all the info I can give.
first off, I just wanted to say i'm glad to hear the update from ASHLEY M, I remember reading your stories a few months back, and while i enjoyed them, i also felt really bad for you and hoped you'd get some help. i know how you feel, i don't like anyone to know when i use the bathroom either.
secondly, to HAIRY ANNIE, you are my favorite, i love your stories! i always look forward to new stuf from you. I absolutely adore you.
now, on to me. as i said i work a professional job which requires me to dress professionally and be a leader to people. a lot of ppl look up to me and i never want them to look down on me. therefor, i never use the restroom with anyone around. i'll only go at home when no one else is there. i also never want to show any sign of desperation, so i've started wearing adult diapers to work. (not the big noisy kind, but the thin ones you can't tell anyone is wearing). this way, i can wet myself and no one ever knows. it makes things so much easier on me, never worrying about finding a restroom or someone seeing me going.
are there any issues i could have from doing this? could i be making myself incontinent by wearing diapers i don't really need? i can't imagine using a stall or urinal next to one of my employees. and at this point, i can't really ask for a private restroom in my office.
I need advice.
My boyfriend and I have different bathroom habits. I have a tiny bladder and I need to pee all the time, but he can hold it for hours and hours. We live about an hour apart and when he comes to see me a couple times a week, he usually has to pee when he gets to my apartment and for some reason I like listening at the door while he goes.
I know it's kind of weird. We're open about announcing when we have to "go", and I've even teased him about being a camel. I've also told him that I could hear him all the way from my bedroom and that it was impressive. He blushed and smiled and that was the end of it. He also has IBS-D and I can hear him in pain sometimes when he's on the pot.
How do I tell him I'd like to see him go? His pees are impressive and I know a ????/back rub while your bowels are in turmoil feels amazing. Thoughts?
Zoe asks for responses from "boys" to the question of squatting to do one's business.
I'm not a boy, I'm a middle-aged man, but I hope that counts. My partner who is Japanese likes to take pictures of my bottom when we share a bath. I hope that means it's still sexy.
In the house where she was born I have no choice but to squat. I'm used to it actually because where I was born in France that type of loo used to be common. They're shaped differently, though.
I find that motions exit my bottom more smoothly and in larger quantity when I squat. I tend to squat for a long time, say 10 or 15 minutes, though my partner squats even longer as she only goes about twice a week and as a result she fills the loo completely and that takes time.
But my produce is voluminous enough, and I once took a photo of what looked like a mushy brown melon right beside a reflection of my bottom in the small amount of water there was there.
I felt very happy after that and I recommend squatting instead of sitting to anybody.
I have another story about squatting but can it wait until another day?
Actually, on reflection, I enjoy sitting too, so long as I can take my time and do an enormous quantity of motions!
i was watching the real world brooklyn the other day and there was a part where one of the girls devyn, a very attractive black girl, was driving to go to an audition. i wasn't paying complete attention so i'm not sure if she was practicing a very strange monologue or something but what she said caught my attention. while driving and getting lost she goes "im so nervous i completely pooped my pa- just completely sharted in my underwear!"
nothing better than a pretty girl talking about doing such a thing if you ask me. even if she didn't really.
Mark E Mark
Long time lurker, hardly ever posts, but something odd happened to me this week. One day I got up and started the shower. As I always do, while I wait for the water to heat up, I stand outside the water and pee a long stream into the shower. This day I decided to have some fun and pointed my penis straight up and watched the golden fountain fall back down on itself. I also purposely peed on my stomach and such. Hey, I was getting a shower so all that would be cleaned up soon enough anyway. The odd thing that happened was after I was done peeing, I pushed some gas out only to poop this very loose and mushy poop in the shower. It took a long time to clean up because everytime I thought I was done and had most of it cleaned up, I would push again and more poop would come out. It was a real mess, but fun nevertheless. All the poop was washed down the drain because it was not solid. I always pee in the shower, but do not poop much there. When I do poop in the shower it is usually firm and I put it in the toilet.
I wonder if anyone else has a situation like mine. I work a typical office job Monday through Friday, and the shift I work means I get to work before my bowels kick in for the morning. At first, it kind of sucked having to take my morning dump at work, but I got used to it. Now it's a minor annoyance, but otherwise I like the job, so I put up with it.
On a work day, my routine is, wake up, shower, get dressed, drive to work. Usually after an hour to an hour and a half after I get there, I have to take a bathroom break and have my morning dump. The office bathrooms are nice and clean, but I can't really take my time like I can at home. Like yesterday, for example, I had to push to get a stubborn turd to come out because there was a line waiting. I hate to draw attention to myself when I'm pooping, but it's hard to push without making the Nggghhh noises. But, after some effort, I got out a sploosh, then a plop, plop and I was done.
Today was a little different - I was the one waiting for a stall to be free, and by the time I got in, I was very desperate. I just sat right down, and with a Pfft opening fart, the gates opened. Ploosh, plop, plop, plop, plop. I probably didn't even take two minutes to finish.
But weekends are my favorite days because those are the days I can sleep in, wake up, take my morning dump, and have a nice relaxing bath, then get on with my day, refreshed. Saturday, I woke up, grabbed the paper and went into the bathroom. I was very gassy that day, not really smelly at all, but loud and many many farts. I only did one medium-length turd after all that farting.
And then on Sunday, it's pretty much the same as Saturday, except I start with the comics. This most recent Sunday, I was just sitting on the toilet, reading the comics and then the paper, easing out one long turd. It came out slowly, little by little, and it just kept getting longer and longer. At one point, it touched the bottom of the toilet bowl and curled around. At last it broke off and settled at the bottom of the toilet. At that point, I looked over and realized I had no toilet paper left on the roll. I really should remember to look, but oh well. It just meant I had to slide my pants off from around my ankle and walk over to the cabinet to get a new roll.
Have not posted for several days....the constipation goes on....I now take epsom salts for a great result but i am running back and forth to the pot for several hours..it is good because it does not cramp etc. If I get really constipated then I am going to the toilet even more often.
I had my dose on Wednesday morning... I did have a sit when I first got up and there was big poo there but it was too hard to get out...I can tell when constipated because if I press on my colon it feels full and hurts a bit. Today was one of those days...I would soooner given myself another day and had the salts on Thursday but on Thursday I had to go to the city so that was out of the question ( meetings all day etc). Got to work on Wednesday and soon had the compelling urge...I dared not fart for fear of a serious shart. The idea with this type of laxative is to wait until the urge is really strong for a better evacuation...epsom salts work by drawing water into the colon (osmosis..hence the term osmotic laxative)...is is best to hold on for a while so as the colon fills up..contracts etc and a better result achieved.
I know when to run to the toiletwhen liqid shit starts to escape into my undies...you do not get much warning ..it is really only a very small amount....and so I hurriedly sat on the throne and a small amount of liqid shit spurted out and then enormous pops....and a gush of soft serve...I certainly had a bit in my bowel!!!! I went three times more...mostly butt piss and felt very much better.
Anyway come yesterday I had been on some pain meds so they make shitting hard. I took a colyxl and senna ( only one tablet...they work on irritating the colon) last night. I got up well before dawn and went to a concert at first light on Australia1s famous Bondi Beach.
After the show had a light breakfast and the poo feeling hit...I went into the public toilets...there were plenty of cubicles and they were clean too...I dropped my shorts and placed my arse on the seat so gentley. There was a big hunk of hard shit in me that wanted out but It was a bit big..I lent a little forward and grunted softly and then a bit louder....and wonder ful relief...it moved and heavily plonked into the stainless steal toilet bowl...it was followed instantly by a torrent of soft turds and I felt just so good....it was sooo heavenly....I sat for a while and relaxed my hole I wiped ...only a couple of sheets needed (Cheryl Crowe take note) pulled up my pants...flushed and went out to commence an enjoyable walk.
THUNDER FROM DOWN UNDER
SpeedyBK: im wondering why you are in a wheelchair... i do not want to be offensive in anyway i am just curious, answer me please
THUNDER FROM DOWN UNDER
Sunday, February 01, 2009
Plunging Plop Guy
Great to read of guys enjoying being overheard on the toilet as their plops drop! All too often, it seems, there's some interruption just when a big one's about to plop into the water. Some time ago I was in a public toilet when the guy in the next cubicle sounded like he was snoring, but then he did an almighty loud plop and I realised he'd been breathing heavily to push it out. Then some more snoring noises, but I listened intently until another almighty plop dropped in to his toilet. Fortunately, my listening pleasure wasn't interrupted by any other noises at the time. He was a young guy, about 25, in jeans. I bet his bum must have got absolutely soaked by the splashback - well I'd like to think so!
Remember the old seying. " I pooped in London and I Pooped in France before i poop here,I would rather poop in my pants"