I've been skimming for the past few days and I think it's time to post a story of my own.
My roomate has an intentional accident fascination so I've gotten used to the fact she will poop anywhere but I've never had an accident of my own before till today. Ellie and I were watching tv when she said she had stomach cramps, I expected her to go in her panties and she did. She stood up and placed a newspaper on her seat. I watched her grunt and squirm the entire time, after she was done she stood up and showed me her work. Their was a giant mess in her panties, they were white too. SO we just continued watching tv while I pondered about what just happened. I decided to do, I took a newspaper and placed it on my seat. I lowered my pants because I didn't want to ruin them. The entire time Ellie just watched me, I grunted and squirmed and I finally felt the warmth gather in my panties. I stood up and showed Ellie who felt it and said it wasn't bad for my first time. I had just opened up a bunch of oppurtunities!
My family went on a picnic today (Labor Day) We had a great day, food, fun, games, family, friends... Barbecue food always reak havok on my intestnes, and today it hit everybody, pretty hard. The mens restrooms at the picnic groves were really nice and clean, very well lit, and well stocked with toilet paper and paper towels, it is a modern building with yellow cinder block walls and toilet dividers, but we were all surprised that none of the booths had doors on such a new building. There were two rows of bowls facing each other, so it could be awkward if you are sitting across from a stranger, but since our group all went to shit together, I was facing my dad, my uncle Rick, and my cousin Sean. My brothers Mike and Tim were on my side. We farted, pissed, shit and shit, and shit some more, but the room had great ventalation, so it didn't stink too bad. we all wiped, hiked our shorts, washed our hands and back to the grove. My dad asked my mom if the women had private stalls, she said 'of course" We figgured as much...
bj, Going outside is great fun. Especially when someone come upon you. What are you going to do. Your squating and a log is expanding your hole and there's nothing you can do to prevent it!
Hi ive been whatching this site for about two months now and i think i hve a story finally to tell. When i was in high school i had woken up that morning with a little urge to poo but when i tried to go i couldnt so i went to school. Now this is a friday and after school i usually went to my friend matts house. As the day went on i had a lot of urges to go but i've never gone to the school bathrooms so i just held it in. So after school i caught up with my other friend josh and we went to matts house but as we were about to get in the car i had another urge to go. And i let out a little fart when i sat down i tried to cover it up tring to sit as hard as i could on the seat. When we finally got to matts house i couldnt go because i could feel that it was going to clog the toilet. so i clenched my butt cheeks and took the pain thinking that i could hold it in boy was i wrong. I could feel the tip trying to get out while laying video games so i went to the bathroom and stood there and told my self to hold it in. so i went back once i could control my self and ultimently i went back two more times. and it becomeing harder and harder to control until i couldnt take it so i sat down and tried to let it come out slowly thinking that mabey i could shape it as i came out. YA RIGHT! it just kept coming and commingand i was SOOOO relived as it finnaly came out.but i looked at the toliet bowl there was about 8in log and i thought theres now way thats going to flush. and panicked. so i just wiped and left it there. ya i know rude but there was no way to flush it and the was no plunger that i could see. i went back and it ended up that i could stay but my friend josh had to leave. That night my friend and i were in his room trying to figure out what to do. When his sister came in and said that there was a Huge poo in the toilet. Now that was emberesing. matt ultimetly went to the garage to get the pulunger. and as he did erika said josh must have been to emberesed to tell us. After that little experience i've never done a number 2 in there house again. But sierously who putts a punger in a garage? u cant get access to it.
As general rule, stools float or sink usually depending on how much fibre you have in your diet. Fibre helps keeps things moving in your G.I. system and, again as a general rule, it's better that you regularly pass floaters rather than sinkers. Processed foods will tend to do just the opposite - i.e. give you sinkers. If you're constipated, odds are your stools will be sinkers.
However, floating stools are not always an indication of a healthy diet & digestive system. If you eat a diet full of a lot of fatty foods, it may also give you floating stools as well.
TO Punk Rock Girl:
When I'm sure I'm done pooping, first I usually grab some TP while sitting down then I fold it twice... Then I stand up and turn around to face the toilet... Wipe once from front to back... I then look at the TP and see how clean it is... If it looks like I need to wipe some more, I'll fold the paper again and wipe once or twice again... Then I check again... In the event the TP is still not clean (and I can't fold the paper over any more), I'll discard it and grab some more from the dispenser...
I like to face the toilet while wiping mostly because I like to see what I've done and how healthy they look. As well, I take note of the odour and see how healthy it seems too.
**I can't understand why some people are so afraid to do those things. I took a medical course and the RN that taught it said in no uncertain language that it's definitely the right thing to do - if only occasionally. Your stools and urine can tell you a lot about your overall current health - just by their visual appearance and aromas.
to punk rock girl
i wipe the same way(i also wipe when stading but dont use wet wipes afterward)
at first, when i was younger i used to wipe about 3 times or whatever, until one day i was caught with dirty underwear by my grandmother and she wipe me clean. ever since then i always wiped until i was absolutely clean
alex`s, great story about your girlfriend
everyone`s stories are great, keep posting
To Hayden: Regarding your interest in stories of keeping your friends from going to the toilet when they are desperate to pee/poo, I had an incident in boy scout camp as a kid. The toilet (latrine) at boy scout camp was very spartan: a small room with a trough urinal for 2 on one wall with a ledge with 2 toilet seats in the open (no doors or partitions) on the opposite wall. One morning I went in to take a dump and sat down next to one of my bunkmates. We all hated the lack of privacy when we first got to camp, but got used to it after a while. As we were sitting there talking, farting, and shitting a kid from another bunk comes running in wearing shorts with one hand over his crotch and his other hand over the lower part of his belly. He asked if either of us was almost done because he really had both a pee and poop emergency. I looked at my bunkmate on the pot next to me, smiled, and said that I wasn't close to being finished; and my bunkmate said the same. The other kid stood there doing a pee-pee and poo-poo dance. All of sudden he squatted down a little, let out a loud crackling fart, and started to shit in his pants. You could see the bulge growing in the rear of his shorts and a few chunks of shit slid down his leg onto the the floor. He stood up, crying a little bit, and then started to pee in pants. A big wet spot formed in the front of his shorts, spread down both his legs, and then made a puddle on the floor. Me and my friend sitting next to me quickly wiped ourselves and ran out of the latrine and got the counselor. He went in to the latrine to help the kid clean up. The poor kid got a lot of grief from the other campers for the rest of the camp season.
More often than not, my girlfriend's poop will float in the bowl rather than sink. I was puzzled by this, as all my poop sinks. Anyway, I did some research on the internet and found the answer to why some poop floats:
Gas causes the turds to become less dense than the water, so they float. In other words, if you have a gassy poop, it will most likely float, but if you tend to have little gas, your poop will probably sink.
Last week I put a picture of Donald Rumsfield in the toliet at work.
I was going to let him have it. So I sit and waiting for the big shit to come out. So I let out this big pices of shit and and landed right on his face. I said YES!
I got up and flushed them both down the toilet. George Bush is next.
I need some help please. I've been constipated for the past, almost week, only being able to poop bits and pieces, and it's really starting to bug me because my stomach is getting bloated and sore, but nothing but a few pieces at a time will come out at once. I've tried eating a ton of fruits and v??s but even that didn't help, and I looked for prune juice but couldn't find any at the store.
I don't particularly want to use laxatives, given their unpredictable timing and risk of an accident, but I also don't want to wait anymore either. What can I do to get things moving? What are some natural laxatives? If none of these work, I don't know what to do.
Any help or advice you can give me would really be appreciated. Thanks!!
Since your quick hand movement was able to stop the flow; why did you later pee all over the place?
Billy and Kevin
Friday, we had an open house at school. My friend Brad was staying with us because his dad had to go on a business trip and his mom had to go to work. After breakfast, mom said to get ready. Kevin went in and dropped a load. Brad said I'm next. I said I am going to wait until the principal starts talking and go at school. Brad said, ok I'll wait. Mom said that she was going to use the bathroom, and that we would go when she was done.
About 3 mintues later, she came out. We were ready, so we walked to school. We went into the cafeteria and sat down. After about ten minutes, the principal started to talk.
I told mom I needed to go to the bathroom. She said you just went. I said that was like an hour and a half ago and I went #1, but now I got to do #2 and #1 again. She said ok. Brad and my little brothers came with me. When we got outside the caf, a kid about our age asked where the bathrooms are. I said, I have drop a deuce, you can follow us. He said he was new in school. It turns out he will be in the same class as me and brad.
When we got to the bathroom, my cousin billy and his little sister were in the bathroom. She was on the regular toilet and he was just sitting down on the handicapped toilet. She peed and dropped a turd. She got up and went to Billy and said wipe me. We told the new kid to sit down. He said that it is kind of weird that there weren't any stalls. But it was like camp, so it was no big deal. He peed. He dropped a long turd and about 3 little turds. He wiped once. While he was wiping, a lady and her two little kids came in. One was going into first grade and the other was in preschool. She said, there's a big line in the lady's room. Is it ok if we go here? I said ok. When the new kid got up, the little boy sat down and peed. Then the lady said, I'd better go next. She sat down and started to pee. Then her little kid said, are you using your bowels? She smiled and said, yes, everyone has to. The lady said to the new kid, why are you still here? He said, lady, this is a boy's room. I am a boy. If you don;t like it, leave. She wiped her butt and got up. A big turd that she made was there. Then her son sat down. My cousin finished up his poop, and I sat on the handicaped toilet. i sat down, and immediately started to pee. Then my first turd started out. My little brother said, I go to pee. So I moved back on and Josh sat down and peed. Then Jeremy sat down and started to go. The kid sitting next to me finished up. He dropped about 4 turds, pretty big for a 6 year old. I said thatwas a big poop. He smiled and said that most of that was mom's. I said, I know. The dark brown turds with the corn are yours. They're pretty big for a kid your age. Your moms are huge, too. She looked at me and her face grew red. I said, lady its no big deal. Then I passed some noisy gas and small turds started to come out. I wiped Jeremy's butt. She said, wash your hand mikey and left with her little kid. Brad sat down. I said to the new kid, we're kind of open about our pooping here, but, usually we keep it to the boys. Her son said she usually send billy with me, but I think she really had to pinch one off and couldn't wait long enoguh for the long line in the lady's room. I finished dropping my little turds. I dropped like a 100 little turds on top of my long turd. And Brad dropped a long one, and then about 5 little turds that floatd. We wiped and flushed. We left nasty streak marks.
When we got back to the caf, mom said that she wished that she had waited to drop her load, too. The principal is boring.
They had lunch for us. And some field games in the field out back. After an hour after lunch, I said to kev and brad that I had better head out to the woods. Jeremy, Josh and Brad came too. Brad said do you need to go back farther after got into the woods. I said, yeah. We went back about 100 ft. We peed and then dropped out pants. Kev, me and Jeremy dropped some turds. We wiped and came back out.
2 of my kids rarely go in the toilet,when they do i have to help them all the way through. one memorable incident was when we-my four kids and i- were at the house and my second youngest, Alan, said, "I go poopie," and he turned around, pulled his shorts down, and showed me that he had indeed gone "poopie". i told him he had been naughty, and he should to go in the toilet. A few hours later, my oldest, who is 5 3/4, ran up to me and said, "Alan's taking up the bathroom and i gotta go peepee!" He was dancing around, holding his weewee.i asked him if he could hold it, but he said that if he couldn't go now, then he'd wet himself. A moment after that, i noticed that there was a steadley growing circle of pee on his shorts, and he turned red. Apparently he also needed a bm, because when i told him to get some new clothes so i could wash the wet ones, i noticed a brown blotch on his undies. He seemed really upset, so i was glad when my husband came home early from a 2 month trip to New York for a funeral/business trip. He[my husband] told Brian [the accident kid] that it was okay and he wasn't in trouble. Then he told Brian his funny "accident" story, which made Brian feel loads better. g2g
Brian at Sears
hey folks: I guess there is another Brian, who also works at Sears, but that wasn't me who was talking to the cleaning man about his 'stink equator" Cute story, but that wasn't me LOL
Where EXACTLY did you feel the urge come from?
Brian at Sears
I had terrible explosive diahreah yesterday at work. I must have made 8 trips to the gents lounge. I don't know what I ate, but whew , I got a great cleaning out. Funny how diahreah stinks sooooo fowl,and people always laugh at the poor guy who is exploding. My buddies stood in front of me gasping for fresh air, while I polluted the lounge. It was all in good fun, and sooner or later, the toilets will be reversed, and I will be the one laughing. Can you say "Ex-Lax in their dessert' ? LOL
To the weekend camper at the game park: I think Peeping Tom got his just desserts--and probably didn't have any appetite for dessert or any other course after your version of entertainment! LOL
Stretched: Interesting toileting experience you had. Kinda rude of the other girls, but that one seemed really helpful. Glad you finally got it all out.
Several years ago, I went to this filling station restroom with a bad case of diarrhea. After I was done, I wanted to be sure that I was well-wiped--and I also wanted to make sure that I didn't flush too much paper down at once. So, I was taking my sweet time cleaning up and flushing. I guess the person out there kept thinking I would come out soon after hearing me flush. She/he started knocking on the door. I said, "Just a minute!" but the person keep on like a persistent woodpecker--only louder by the minute. I didn't know why that person didn't just go somewhere else, but I guessed that she/he liked the challenge.
My guess was that it would be some kind of really punky teenager.
Instead, when I opened the door, I found an entire Chinese nuclear family waiting out side (mom, dad, 2 or three kids). They all gave me dirty looks. I'd always thought of Oriental families being more polite. This certainly stuck pins in my stereotype.
As for why you had a dream about Joaquin Phoenix on the john when you're sweet on him...because you're sweet on him! You might like to become close enough to him to share something as intimate and private as keeping each other company in the bathroom, so you had a dream about it.
When I was 12, I had this dream of having to go to the bathroom in this old house, so I opened the door of the bathroom, and there was Billy Preston sitting on the toilet. Of course, I said, "Excuse me!" and closed the door. I came back later, and he was still in there. I didn't go back in, but I asked him through the door, "Are you stuck?" He told me he was. (That is, stuck as in constipation). So I did something else and came back. I was hoping to catch Billy as he was coming out, as I had this huge crush on him, but he was gone by the time I returned, so I went on in to pee. The bathroom had a faint odor of rotten cabbage.
When I was 25, I had this dream that I was on a date with Mark Lindsay. At the time, I was in love with someone else, but I'd always had a crush on Mark ever since he and the rest of Paul Revere And The Raiders were regulars on Where The Action Is. I really had to pee, and we were out walking around. Soon, we came across this auto repair garage. It was deserted, but the door to it was open. We couldn't find any restroom in there, so Mark suggested that I go around on the other side of this car and squat. I told him not to look, and he promised me that he wouldn't.
Still, there was just this thing about peeing so close to my date, and, even though I trusted him not to look, I was afraid that he might see me by accident. So I was unable to pee.
The real story was that I had a very full bladder, and being unable to empty it in my dream made sure that I didn't wet the bed in real life.
Not only did I wake up with a full bladder but I also woke up with a bladder infection, because, when I got out of bed to go pee, I found that I couldn't stand up.
I was living at home then, so I called for my folks to come help me into the bathroom. They were gone, but we had a friend living with us who was (still is) like a brother to me. He came in and helped me to the bathroom, telling me not to flush until he took a look at my pee.
When he did, he told me that I had a bladder infection because my urine was very cloudy.
It was December 31, so our family doctor wasn't in. Fortunately, one of his stand-ins was, meaning that I was able to get some meds to take care of the infection.
I've had some interesting poops lately, but more on them another time. For right now, I want to ask everybody a question.
When I was four or five years old, my folks and I stopped at this one local supermarket to pick up a whipped cream cake to take with us when we went to visit my grandpa and uncle. This would probably be in 1957.
Anyway, there was a mini-carnival in the parking lot of the supermarket that day, and one of the rides was a merry-go-round that had--instead of the usual horses and benches--places to sit that dangled from heavy chains. These places had been designed to look like bathtubs, sinks, and toilets.
This was the first--and last--time that I saw anything like it. Have any of you seen such a merry-go-round?
I should begin by saying a friend of mine referred me to this site after I told her the story I've posted below.
How's this for an accident story?
It was a long way to where I was going. I found myself on some long stretch of a quiet interstate, trying to get to a conference. In a businesswoman's world, there are tons of little inconveniences that will annoy a woman to death. There is no greater annoyance than a long, drawn-out business trip to a city I've never visited. Well, scratch that. There is one annoyance greater than that. It was during this business trip that I felt an urgent need to use the bathroom, even though there was no rest stops for several miles.
As the sun went down, I felt a little weary. I visited the last rest stop over an hour beforehand to fill up on gas and stretch my legs. I also made the mistake of pumping a little caffeine in my system. Now about 120 miles shy of the next available bathroom, my bladder began to ache. For most of the time, my need to urinate was nothing more than a nuisance, a small discomfort that came with driving for so long.
The nuisance became a noticeable bother, then after almost two hours I felt as if I were at the breaking point. My bladder began to distract me from the road, begging me to relieve it. In such a predicament, one was left to wonder how this situation was to be remedied. I knew I didn't have much time to find a decision; I knew that if I waited too long I would no longer be able to control my bladder. So here I was, a well-to-do, determined and intelligent 28-year-old black woman, struggling to resist something as elementary as wetting myself.
I waited and waited. My palms were sweaty. My legs were trembling. No rest stops for another ten miles... well, I was almost there. I figured that I held out for so long that another ten miles wouldn't be so tough to handle. But until urine began to sprinkle into my underpants I was sure I could wait. I'd been defeated at last, so I had no other option but to let the wetting accident occur. I felt the warm urine all over the place, and I felt like crying. Before then, I hadn't wet myself since kindergarten.
Before the conference was over, I decided to hit up the pharmacy. As embarrassed and reluctant I was to be buying incontinence products, I wasn't about to stain my upholstery any more on the way home. Frankly, I was glad I bought them. I recommend them to anyone who has to take long road trips. I'd rather wear a diaper than wet my formalwear and pay absurd amounts of money to clean the interior of my car.
My question is this: Do any of you women have similar experiences?
don't know if I ate something bad or what but I've had a serious case of the shits the past couple days. it started yesterday when I woke up with an explosion of soft-serve crap the texture of chili. I had a few more like that through the day. then that evening it really started. I was all chilled out on the couch with a cold beer and I felt this..well..bubbling in my gut. I'd been farting a lot through the day and so I raised my leg and let it rip. bad thing was that after I was done, it felt awful warm and wet back there so I stood up, pulled down my shorts and jockeys and saw a fairly big, very very wet light brown stain. then I looked down at the couch and saw a smaller one there! so I decided it was prolly time to go let this out and spent the night on the can with completely liquid shit and gas actually squirting outta my ass. today it's somewhat better, been to the shitter about three times, one time I pretty much spray-painted the bowl a kind of unheard of orangy-gold-brown, the rest of the day it's just been that weird clear brown slime you get with the squirts sometimes. the underwear I threw out since the stain didn't come out in the washer, didn't know what to do about the couch so for now I have the cushion turned over.
Hey, my fellow toileteers! How's it going? To all my Canadian posters on here, hope you are having an amazing Labour Day weekend!! To everyone else, hope your weekend was great.
On to my new first time experiences with an enema...
For the past week or so I've been badly constipated, and have taken great measures to relieve myself. I've tried drinking as much water as possible, and eating as much fruits and v??s as I can, and still nothing. I even became so desperate that I started eating alot of milk products to induce a BM, even though I know too much milk products really upsets my stomach, but when you're constipated and need a solution, without the use of laxatives, you would try anything to evacuate your bowels, right? So after days of agony and eating shitloads(no pun intended) of fruits and v???s and whatnot, and pooping out a pathetically small amount of poop, I became frustrated, because even with all the fruit and milk and stuff, my stomach was becoming bloated and sore and I couldn't poop more than a couple of tiny little pieces at a time, so you can probably understand why I was getting frustrated and desperate. After a few days of barely pooping, or experiencing only a bit of runny poop, I decided yesterday to go to the drugstore and see what solutions they had for constipation.
Since a lot of laxatives are harsh and result in really embarrassing flatulence and the chance of it kicking in when you don't expect it I didn't want to go that route. And suppositories gave me a bad experience last time I used them, they don't do anything for me. So I was looking around and I saw an enema kit, and thought that was odd because I've never seen one before, I thought those were only in the case of going to the hospital, so, curious, I picked up one of the boxes and opened it to see what it looked like to avoid getting too nervous about using one. I read the instructions first, and the enema could still be given without the solution, just with plain water, so I paid about $5.99 for it, and I bought some Vaseline to lubricate the tip and my hole.
I went home and had dinner, and after dinner, my husband wanted to see the enema, since he's never seen or had one before either, and he was disappointed that such a small pump cost $6, but you get what you pay for. We read the instructions, and even though I never had it done and never even had one before, I explained the best I could how they work and how to use one, since he's from Taiwan, and he hasn't seen anything like that before. So after I had a chance to digest my dinner and my stomach felt full, I prepared the enema and my lie-down spot, and my husband grabbed a bucket in case I couldn't make it to the bathroom. I undressed everything from the waist down. He wanted to do it, and said the whole idea turned him on, but I laid on the floor on my left side with my knee by my chest and slowly and gently inserted the enema. Man is it a weird feeling if you're not used to it!! I could feel myself tensing but I took deep breaths and inserted the nozzle all the way, and slowly started releasing water into my rectum. It felt really strange but exciting at the same time. The water rushing up my anus felt very weird, and a bit uncomfortable, but at the same time I was liking the first-time experience with the enema. I felt a bit of the water run back down my leg, and in a panic I thought I was already shitting myself lol. I emptied almost the whole enema into my rectum, with only a bit of water left in the enema. I laid on my side and watched a movie to pass the time while I held it for a while, and about 10 minutes later, I felt the familiar cramps and gurgling, and quickly got to my feet and got to the bathroom. As soon as I sat on the toilet I started peeing from my butt, and then ended up straining because I still felt the need to go, but nothing else came out, so I was disappointed with the results.
Then tonight after my husband went to work, and after only a couple of tiny pieces of poop came out, I broke out the enema bag again and filled it with warm water, because my body still hadn't evacuated much of anything, even after all those days of eating fruits, ve?? and milk products, still not much. I laid on the bed and pulled my panties down and filled my rectum with the warm water again, and within 5 minutes I felt the need to really shit!! I pulled my panties back up and ran to the bathroom, but in the doorway I started leaking liquid poop!! Oh shit!! I tried to run to the toilet, but no matter how much I moved I was still shitting myself, so out of desperation I jumped into the bathtub and let go. I know it was a dumb thing to do, but I knew it was better than days of suffering from bloating and constipation, and I wouldn't have made it to the toilet without a huge mess anyway.
I stood in the bathtub and dreaded what I was about to do, but I knew it would feel a lot better than being sick for the next few days, so reluctantly, I pushed and liquid stuff starting going into my panties, and then my bowels really opened up and mushy poop filled my panties at an alarming rate, and I stood there in shock realizing what I was doing was very gross, but I was desperate, so I didn't bother to stop the accident. Wave after wave of mushy poop came out, followed by a semi-solid, semi-mushy log. Must have been about 5 straight minutes of pooping my panties. It made a disgusting squishing noise, and my stomach rumbled furiously as it evacuated itself in my pants. It was so gross and felt so disgusting because I knew it was all over my underwear and all over my butt, but at the same time, I felt a great sense of relief, knowing that finally my stomach could be at peace and that it was pretty much empty, also kind of turned on while having the accident, maybe at the idea that it was a naughty thing to do. Finally after another few seconds, the mad pooping stopped, and I had to pee too, so I decided that since I was already dirty that I should just pee myself anyway, so I let go and a long pee soaked my panties but good.
I felt so disgusting and dirty afterwards, and a sense of shame knowing that I could have made it if I wanted to, maybe even embarrassment about being 20 and having an accident, but hey, it happens, so I guess it's better to make the best of it. No big deal. I was disgusted and embarrassed and shocked but at the same time, kind of turned on, am I weird for feeling like this? I stepped out of my dirty panties right afterwards and emptied the log into the toilet and immediately turned the shower on cold, and rinsed the remainder of the mess out of my underwear, luckily, almost everything came out. Then I turned on the warm water and took a shower, cleaning myself off well, and then I changed into my PJs. That was a couple of hours ago, and my stomach is still rumbling, I will be sure to make it this time.
So that's my story, my first time experiences with an enema. Despite having an accident, I think the enema is worth doing again :) Now I see why some of the people on here say that it is a relief after doing so, it really does clean you out!! :D
Happy toileting, everyone! Keep the amazing stories coming, I love coming to this site, and make it an everyday ritual, hehe! It's addictive :D
Greg (Mike's Friend)
Hey Guys and Gals,
Sorry about my prolonged absence. After going back to work and getting busy, it gets hectic and hard to find time to sit down at your keyboard and put your experiences in words.
When I last left off, I had been posting some great experiences I had with my high school and college buddy Mike. I had a rather longwinded story on page 1489 about the very first time I ever witnessed Mike take a really big shit. It may well have been possibly the most amazing crap I ever saw taken for a number of reasons including the big buildup to the event, the desperation Mike went through in reaching the bathroom and the way he expressed his desperation through verbal and non-verbal cues, the way the crap came blasting through him when he finally reached the shitter, and the clear effects you could see on his face as he sat there with his ass exploding.
Fortunately, that doesn't mean that the good stories have dried up.
For a few years after we graduated from college, Mike and I got together from time to time, but there was nothing exceptional to report. However, I decided to pay Mike a visit in New York a few years after we graduated after he got a job located in a very tall building that no longer exists because some individuals saw fit to fly a couple of airplanes into it about 5 years ago. (Fortunately, Mike, along with his wife and 2 kids had moved from New York to another large city on the West coast by then).
As Mike was relatively new to the job and didn't have much in the way of time off, I would need to pretty much show myself around town during the day while we hung out in the afternoons and evenings.
On the second day of my visit, we had both gotten up around 6:30 and had breakfast and I hit the shower in the small bath first. Well, after I'm in there about 5 minutes with the curtain pulled and lathered up, I suddenly hear that unmistakable sound of an exceptionally loud toilet-resonated fart and seconds later the room is filled with toxic fumes choking the life out of me. Sure enough, when I pulled back the curtain to see what was going on, I discovered Mike bumming on the toilet with his back to me wearing nothing but a pair of white briefs stretched around his calves sitting there huffing and flexing and puffing as he sat there filling the toilet with excrement.
"Duuuude!!" I exclaimed in disbelief.
"Sorry about the bro." Replied Mike between huffs. "I really needed to have a shit that wouldn't wait."
For the next 10 minutes I showered while Mike crackled and sputtered and farted and fizzled, and popped. I was a bit embarrassed to get out of the shower and walk past my bumming friend as his situation had caused a bit of a physical reaction on my part!
Finally, after what seemed like endless huffing, flexing, puffing, crackling, sputtering, farting, fizzling, and popping, I finally heard Mike wipe numerous times, flush and walk out. I was then able to get out and grab a towel without revealing my condition that Mike surprise dump had caused! We were both 25 by then, and I discovered that even after all these years, Mike STILL looked AWESOME on the toilet!!
Things were about to get better from there…..
A couple mornings later, I was in the bath brushing my teeth when Mike walks up to the door. It's a narrow bath and Mike starts walking in wearing just a tee shirt and brief.
"Let me get past you bro. I really need to take a dump."
Mike then just bangs the seat down, drops his briefs around his ankles and mounts the pot totally unembarrassed and uninhibited.
After a moment, I'm still there brushing my teeth when Mike extends his finger to me and says with a big grin…
"Dude, pull my finger….."
I roll my eyes but I go along with the gag and pull his finger. The next instant my loaded friend ripped a solid fart before a heavy barrage of excrement came gushing out of Mike who heaved a big sigh of relief.
"Whew! Thanks, I really needed that!
"Anything I can do to help." I replied sarcastically.
I was done brushing before Mike was done bumming so I left him to huff, flex, puff, crackle, sputter, fart, fizzle and pop in peace. He was done about 10 minutes later.
But the BEST came that afternoon!!!
Around 11:30, I met Mike at his workplace and we decided to go to this Mongolian grill for lunch where you make your own stir fry. When we got there, I decided to lay off the curry because you could just tell that stuff was just lying in wait for some poor hapless soul to consume it and then play havoc with their bowels. In my opinion, that stuff is EVIL!!! I think "Curry" probably means "Shit-inducing" in Swahili.
But do you think that deterred Mike from laying on an extra-large helping on his chicken dish??????? Evidently, Mike wasn't up on his Swahili, or he would have known better.
I watched incredulously as Mike devoured this extra-large, shit-inducing curry-laden beast then watched in utter disbelief as Mike went back to the line for an extra helping. At this time, all I could think was, "By the end of the day, that dude is going to SHIIIIIIIIT!!!" As it turned out, it wouldn't take nearly that long.
After leaving the restaurant and walking a couple of blocks, Mike was hit with some nasty painful cramps that nearly had him double over.
"Oh my God!" Mike exclaimed as he winced in pain. "I just got the nastiest cramp."
"That means you have a big nasty shit on the way. Hope you know where the bathroom is!!" I warned him.
"You're probably right." He replied. "Let's hurry up."
I already knew that Mike's irritated bowels were directing a nasty major load of excrement toward his rectum and that Mike would be experiencing some severe GI contractions in the next five minutes that would make Mike incredibly desperate for a toilet. All I needed to do now to see Mike severely loaded on the toilet in the throes of an incredibly major shit was just to hang with him for the next 10 minutes.
After we got another block, Mike was hit with another exceptionally severe cramp. This was going to be even better than I first thought. This cramp was followed by yet another nasty one a minute later.
As we neared Mike's office building, Mike started to walk with even more urgency as his rectum started to fill up with the shit induced by the curry. I actually heard Mike's bowels gurgling and grumbling as I hurriedly walked next to him. When we entered the building, Mike was walking upright with his butt tightly clenched. The way he clenched his butt told me;
A: Said butt was now desperately loaded with excrement beyond capacity, and
B; Said owner of butt was fighting hard to hold said excrement in until he reached the toilet.
About 15 painful desperate seconds later, Mike and I did find our way into a rather cool looking washroom. The walls and floors were made of highly polished marble. Hurriedly making his way into a stall, I could see that the polished marble gave a nearly perfect reflection of my desperately loaded buddy as he went about preparing to shit. The stall had a gap in the partitions that gave you a perfect side view of the toilet and another gap that would give me a good look of Mike's face as he sat and bummed out.
Mike first quickly hung his suit jacket up on a hook in the stall that did absolutely nothing to impede my view and then you could see the reflection as he flung his necktie over his shoulder. Looking at the floor reflection, you could see Mike desperately work on his belt, top button and zipper as he dropped his pants. The marble wall then perfectly reflected Mike's highly pressurized ass going down as the desperately loaded young man mounted the desperately needed toilet for a desperately needed shit. Let's just say that THIS time, Mike wasn't going to need anyone to pull his finger!!!!!
A second after seeing his incredibly loaded butt hit the crapper, I heard it explode with a loud fart and a massive devastating barrage of soft loose shit came thundering out of Mike. At this time, I was also able get a look at Mike's facial reaction as he helplessly sat there filling the badly-needed toilet with a whole bunch of soft loose excrement. Mike looked like he was really reeling from the effects of all that shit going through him and his eyes looked like his ass was exploding, which it was.
This overwhelming wave of soft loose shit seemed to go on endlessly for a long minute or so before Mike settled into a pattern of crackling, sputtering, farting, fizzling, and popping. As Mike continued to sit with his pants down, I looked in on him again and saw he really looked beaten and disheveled. He hadn't torn off a single sheet of paper and already he looked wiped out.
"I should have known better about that restaurant." Mike finally called out to me. "It always makes me SHIT."
"Really sorry about that bro!" I replied. "If I had known that, I would have picked somewhere else." (I am SUCH a notorious LIAR!!!!)
Despite having finally expelled all that soft loose shit from his body, Mike continued to have a worried look on his face as he remained on the toilet without wiping. I understood why a moment later as a massive overwhelming wave of diarrhea blasted through Mike and splattered the walls of the toilet. I could now see that Mike looked really weak and run down as he stared at the floor.
"This really SUCKS bro!" Was all Mike could say after the diarrhea went right through him.
After 3 more nasty waves of diarrhea hit him over the next 5 minutes, Mike decided he better try and get back to work and he finally started wiping up.
After finishing up, Mike was understandably not feeling his best but was going to try to gut it out at work for the rest of the day. We decided to make it a night in since he was under the weather and I went back to his apartment to take a brief nap and wait for him.
A few hours later, I was resting on the sofa back at Mike's apartment. I was half asleep when I heard a key hurriedly open the door. I then heard footsteps across the floor as the bathroom door was shoved open and the toilet seat banged down. Whoever had come in had not made an attempt to close the front door or the bathroom door. I then heard the familiar rustle of pants being dropped followed by the sound of a whole bunch of soft loose shit rushing into the toilet.
Well, I figured either a burglar had broken in to Mike's apartment to take a serious shit, or Mike was still feeling the ill effects of the curry. Walking to the bathroom, I found Mike there sitting with his pants down, breathing quite heavily still bumming on the toilet. Mike didn't even bother to look up as he said hello in a weak voice. A moment later he was absolutely pounded by another wave of diarrhea.... And then another wave.... And then another. As we talked, Mike told me he had to rush to the bathroom 3 more times at work after I left. Once Mike was finished up in the bathroom, he took a great big dose of Pepto Bismol and some Immodium AD. He then went and took a 2-hour nap before we rented a movie to stay in and rest and let Mike's intestines recover.
The next day, Mike was his old self again and we went out to a club that evening. To this day, I do not believe Mike has ever eaten curry again.