Pee by the TreeWhen I was about 7 years old, my mothers helper, Nora, took me and my younger sister to the nearby city park. It was April and the bathrooms were not yet open for the season. They opened on May 1. After a short while, Nora said the she had forgotten to go to the bathroom before leaving the house and needed to pee. She got a towel out of my sisters stroller. She said she would urinate by a nearby tree and I should hold the towel in front of her so anyone coming along, including me, would not see her making ciss. So I held up the towel in front of her while she pulled down her shorts and underpants and telling me not to look behind the towel. Next, I heard her start to go. Suddenly, a gust of wind hit me. I hadnt been holding the towel very hard and I dropped it. So there she was, her pee rushing out of her pussy. "Harry", she shouted. "Dont look. Im making pee-pee. Dont look between my legs". I went to get the towel, but it was too late. I was already seeing her urine flowing out. She never tried to stop. I picked up the towel and held it in front of her again. "Thank you, Harry", she said. Shortly, she finished, shook herself a little, pulled up her pants,and that was the end.
Sunday, April 09, 2017
Question for After School Emily and MollyHave you ever tried an enema for your constipation "times". I've always used them as a solution. They are always much gentler than ANY laxative I've ever had. As sisters it should be easy to help one another out with one...always easier if they are given by someone (my case a nurse).--JW
Haha this story is very very funny, so one time there were two guys that that need to pee real badly,they just peed under the tree,and you know what?
our teacher caught them in the act
Plus they smelled like pee LOL!
Do some girls wet the underside of the toilet seat?So have an honest question for any of the women here who would be kind enough to answer. I was at a friend's house a few weeks ago with a group of adults for a get together. After being there for a while I began to feel the urge to pee so I scanned over to the bathroom door to see if it was open or closed. It was closed and I did recall one of the women going in there a short time before.
Shortly after the lady (who's name I won't mention) came out and I made my move to the bathroom. I don't think she pooped cause she wasn't in there long and I didn't smell anything. I closed the door and walked over to the toilet to find the seat down. It was a fairly new toilet with an elongated bowl. I only needed to pee so I lifted the seat up and when I did, the underside of the front of the seat was wet with yellow urine which began to run down since the seat was now vertical.
I wasn't upset or grossed out since it's a toilet and I expect a certain amount of stuff like this from normal use. It just got me curious though. I don't think a male could have done that sitting down because my penis naturally hangs straight down and I would actually have to point it up with my hand to do that.
So it would seem to me that the lady must have squirted the underside of the seat a bit. I've never actually seen a womans stream of urine as it comes out from a sitting posture and falls through the toilet seat and into the toilet so it just makes me curious.
Do some of you ladies occasionally have problems with multiple streams that could want to shoot under the seat? Perhaps a thinner or heavier woman would produce a different aim? I'm not complaining at all, I'm just genuinely curious.
For the record I as a male sometimes have multiple streams that come out and it's impossible to get it all in the toilet. I produce a primary stream that I aim in the middle of the bowl but these little offshoots sometimes want to go down on the floor and even on my foot occasionally. The only way around that is for me to kneel on one knee and and pee into the toilet so my penis is only a few inches above the toilet rim. It's not fun.
I've also noticed that no matter how good I aim and even when my stream is perfect which is 90% of the time, there is always a certain amount of splatter that comes out of the toilet and splatters the rim and even the floor a little bit. This is why wooden toilet seats with brass hinges often corrode. It's just because the fall from an adult male's crotch to the toilet is so high.
I know it's pretty rare but I would love to have a real men's urinal in my house someday just for this reason. It takes up more space in the bathroom but all in all it would keep the toilet a lot cleaner, I'm sure the ladies of the house would appreciate that anyway.
Occasionally I see poop splatter on the underneath side of toilet seats too, though it seems to prevail only in certain houses. It's a bit of a mystery to me too. I can see someone sitting too far back and soiling the top of the seat, or splattering the bowl itself, but it seems that to soil the bottom of the seat, poop would have to shoot immediately from your anus sideways and kind of skid against the bottom of the seat. I don't tend to have this problem but It makes me genuinely curious as to how it happens.
My toilet seat is a Kohler "French Curve" model and it has a kind of funneled shape that makes it very pleasurable to sit on. When you put the seat up you can see that the hole is flared out to a lip so any toilet water that splashes up from poops will run down into the toilet and not on the rim of the bowl.
All in all a clean toilet is always good but I must admit that I get very curious when I see peoples "tell tale" marks. If I see clear water on the bottom of the rear or sides of the seat then somebody probably pooped. When there is brown splatter on the bowl I know somebody had gassy diarrhea. I don't really think much about the filth that I'm seeing but the fact that a person sat down here and enjoyed some much needed comforting of their body. I don't find that to be disgusting at all. I say the toilet is one of the most comfortable seats in the house!
Contoured toilet seats and elongated Vs round seatsSo I've been reading back several pages here and I see I'm not the only one who has a contoured toilet seat! I did some shopping around to find the one that I have and I would agree with Victoria B that the cupping sensation on the butt cheeks and thighs is very pleasing and it naturally opens my anus for an easier poop. I notice my poop slides and shoots out easier. I even think it helps my bassy farts blast and echo in the bowl louder which I just love, LOL!
It's weird how some people feel the opposite about these seats but I've noticed that mine is not so comfy if you try to sit really far forward on it. Then it just digs into your thighs. It's meant for you to sit fully on the seat so your butt cheeks can rest all around the back curve of the seat and there's still plenty of clearance for your anus so you don't poop on the seat.
I've also seen some contoured seats with an open front on public toilets. I remember my local Target store had them for years. The back of the seat was curved up so as to conform to your butt and there was a little bit of a cut out in the back of the seat hole so your anus wouldn't be over the seat. Those are just as nice as my seat at home.
Victoria B: I just wanted to comment on your black toilet. I love that you heard your friend poop in it and she enjoyed using it! Some people get annoyed when other people take a big poop in their toilet but that seems rather rude to me and I'm happy to offer my toilet to my guests. Like you, I enjoy listening to them too.
The house that I live in now has a fancy black one piece toilet in a half bath off the hall so it's the one that all my guests use and almost everyone that sees it comments on it. Several ladies have mentioned they loved the contoured seat and I love to hear that. It's also elongated which as a man I find much more comfortable than trying to cram my stuff into a round one.
I've always loved the lustrous shine of the black porcelain and it's so cool when you look in the bowl and can't see the hole. You can usually see your reflection. It seems that urine color doesn't show up well if at all but you can still see poop and TP. The only thing is the black can show dust and hard water deposits more than white. I just love black toilets though. I've seen people who buy the cheapest toilet they can because they figure it's not worth much more than the poop they put in it. I disagree though. I love using the toilet so appreciate it when someone invests a little love in a classy toilet, and whole bathroom for that matter. One more thing. You mentioned in your glove poop post that you have room mates. Have they ever made any remarks about the black toilet or the seat? I'm looking forward to reading about more of your great poops!
One last question for anybody to answer: Does anybody have a preference to regular round front toilets, or to elongated ones? I'm not sure but elongated bowls may be hard to find in other countries (I'm in the USA). The house I grew up in had round front toilets and I never cared much but once I moved to a house with an elongated toilet and got used to it I realized how roomy it is. I can sit my butt fully on the seat and my junk never touches the seat. I definitely feel cramped and tight when I use a round toilet now and I hate it!
I'm particularly interested how the ladies feel about this. Do you women prefer round or elongated and why?
Well I think that's enough. Have a happy time in your bathroom everybody!
Seat up VS. seat down VS lid down?I suppose it's an age old argument between the two sexes as to whether it's okay to leave the toilet seat as you used it ( or didn't use it as I am a male). I would accept that most women want the seat left down for them since they use it every trip to the toilet. I've seen men that refuse to put it the seat down and then I've seen men that lovingly leave it down for their wife or daughters, etc.
For my part I would be happy to leave the seat down for any woman that wanted me to but I don't really want to talk about the seat up Vs. down issue.
I want to discuss a third option to this issue. When I was growing up there were 4 males and 3 females in the house. I never once heard the men or women complain about the toilet seat because our mother asked all of us to leave the lid down instead. We had small bathrooms with shelves above the toilets and a washing machine right next to one of them. My mother got tired of dropping things in an open toilet bowl so she didn't nag us about it but she simply asked us to be in the habit of closing the lid. As a result, there was never any complaining about the issue.
As easy as I am about this issue, that does seem like the best solution overall especially if boys and girls can't otherwise come to a compromise.
I would be curious to hear from the fine ladies on this site as what you think about specifically leaving the lid down? Do you think this is an acceptable compromise since both sexes will have to address the seat for themselves? Do you also like closing the lid to keep stuff out of the toilet? Or would it still really annoy you to not be able to just walk in and sit down? I'm open to all ideas.
Men feel free to chime in as well!
I personally feel like this is the best solution where boys and girls can't come to an agreement or if other things happen over the toilet besides pooping and peeing. Probably a good idea to close the lid then. Many people have bigger uncluttered bathrooms where the toilet is over away from the sink and tub and things would be less likely to fall in it so that would be convenient.
I'm a single man but to be honest when the days comes that I have a wife that I'm head over heals in love with, I think I would not be able to help but think of her and leave the seat down for her. If she specifically wanted in closed that would be fine too.
FloodedSo, I've been talking to this one girl on a popular app. Let's call her C, she's in her 20's, blonde with glasses, and is decent looks wise.
This past Monday she said about having a bad day. Upon asking her about that, she told me that she overflowed her friends toilet onto the bathroom floor that day. She went on to say that she felt bad about it, and ended up buying her friend a new bath set. I didn't get much more than that detail wise, but thought it was interesting that she basically admitted to taking a shit and clogging the toilet up when it came time to flush. Any thoughts? Hope you enjoy the quick story. And I apologize for the lack of real details, but these are all I really know of the situation
Yesterday was an unexpected chapter in my issues very long trips and needs bathrooms. The medications that keep me going ran out before I got back here. Yesterday, I went to the V.A. to get refills and maybe a new prescription for an old med.
As I was pulling into the parking lot I started feeling the need for a poop. I got the truck parked and started walking across the parking lot and the need was getting worse. Half was across suddenly a large wet load dropped in my tighty no longer white underwear. I needed to at least let the one of secretaries know I had a problem. It was handled like it was a routine issue. I was told to continue to wait till the doctor's nurse called me. I asked that she call my phone and waited outside. There was already a serious stain on the back of my pants, fortunately my shirttail covered it. Twenty minutes later I was called. I head in and was escorted an exam room. I made my request for the new prescription and as was expected was told I needed lab work before the prescription could be issued. I asked to go home clean up and be back in 45 minutes and was told to get the lab done 1st. So up to the 3rd floor for a blood draw and a pee in the cup. Got back downstairs and was met by the nurse and told her I'd be back as quick as possible.
At home I got my dirty clothes off, ran a wet cloth over my but, put on new underwear and jeans. Back at the VA I was taken to the exam room by the nurse, and after a 20 minute wait met the doctor. She was a new one, unlike the cute nurse that was too young for me, the doctor and I are about the same age. We got down to basic introductions, made the already documented med request. And then it was noted I'd not had a routine exam for more than 2 years. And so the doctor asked me about my morning as she went about her exam. I had to relive the mortification all over again. The doctor knew I was moving to north Idaho and asked where, I told her Athol and she came right back saying I should check out the Spirit Lake RV campground. I was dumbfounded that this black female doctor in gulf coast MS knew N. Idaho. I was greatly impressed with the doctor but then at this VA I've never had less than very good one. I hope the doc I had sticks around longer than most. My jeans and underwear have not been washed yet, and I don't know that they would ever lose the stain. (and all the way through I was treated as if a 64 y.o. with a massage wet crap in his pants was an everyday deal. O.0
Peeing From My WheelchairMy wife and I went to the movies yesterday and because it was a large multiplex theater, I decided to use my wheelchair. We're both retired and we decided to make a day of it by seeing two movies: one in late morning and the other mid afternoon.
We had only about twenty minutes between the two movies and I needed to pee. I wheeled into the men's room and immediately found a large handicapped stall that would easily accommodate my wheelchair and allow me to close the stall door behind me. In these situations I usually either transfer to the toilet seat and pull down my trousers and underwear either to urinate or have a BM, or I stand at the commode to pee. But yesterday I did something different.
I didn't need to poop (I had already done that earlier at home) and I didn't feel like undoing my clothes to sit on the toilet. That quickly I wondered if I could pee sitting in my wheelchair. In order to get closer to the toilet I slid my wheelchair's footrests to the sides and wheeled in. Next, I slid forward in the seat of my wheelchair and pulled my pants' zipper down and did the usual boy/man thing. At first I had a spurt of pee in the toilet but I knew I still had to do more. I relaxed a little and the next thing I knew I had a full urine stream going directly into the toilet. In another minute I was done, got fixed-up, flushed the toilet, and left the men's room.
For all the many years I've used a wheelchair and have been in and out of bathrooms, I never thought to pee from me wheelchair. My biggest fear is that I would have peed on the floor, on the wheelchair or on myself. I was surprised at how well this worked and may do it again when the situation and need present themselves.
Flushing foodI recently hung out with a friend who flushes food waste down the toilet, namely leftover cereal. I'd never heard of anyone using the toilet for more than pee, poop and occasionally puke before, it struck me as very odd. Does anyone else here do this?
About JordanIn the summer after 2nd grade, I spent a lot of time with my friend Jordan. She did a lot of things with my family and I went out with her family. So there wasn't a lot of boredom. We were both pretty adventureous and had a good time together. However, she was by far the most underdeveloped person in our class. Being by far the shortest, meant she had some difficulty getting up onto the swing in the backyard and she couldn't do many of the rides at carnivals and amusement parks.
Jordan didn't have as much problem getting up on the toilet at home. She had been taught to put her arms on the toilet to help her get up on it. It worked fine. But what happened at school, at theaters, at amusement parks, and places like that was more difficult. See the toilets were overall larger. They were even higher. And the auto flushers especially at highway rest areas were the worse. Sometimes she would try and sit over the side of the toilet seat. But the seat was so wide that sitting back far enough to clearly drop her pee or crap would potentially cause her to fall in (or at least she feared it). When she was able to get herself on from the front, I was hopeful, but she was very uncomfortable sitting. And, of course, that frustrated her.
One time she had a really soft crap, but since she didn't sit back on the seat far enough, she ended up going between her legs and over the front of the seat. This was at a highway rest stop and her mom had stayed in the car. When I had to go out and get her, she got more upset at Jordan than ever, but she came in and helped clean her up. But in doing so, and later as we continued to our motel, Jordan's mom ranted about why there are no child-size toilets available at many public places. A few miles later Jordan had another round to unload. Her mom took her in, picked her up and dropped her down on the toilet, and again slammed the highway authority or something like that I didn't understand.
Then when Jordan finally got down, wiped herself, probably a few more times because her soft poop was messy, her mom took the toilet next door. She dropped to the seat with a thud, and immediately let off loud blasts as her crap came out. Jordan whispered to me that her mom was The Blaster. We both snickered and then we heard her mom give off a real sigh of relief. Then her mom asked us to bring her some toilet paper. She had forgotten to check before she sat down.
toilet farts Vs. pants fartsThis site is so fun! So I just took my second poop of the day and it was not that big. I seated myself on my nice one piece elongated toilet and my butt enjoyed my comfy toilet seat. Most of my poop came out in one slug with a few pieces after that once I relaxed my diaphragm and gave a couple more pushes. I felt no more poop in my rectum so I began to wipe. I wiped once or twice. As I reached back to pull out another wad of TP felt a sudden fart come out and incidentally I was putting a little bit of pressure on my diaphragm so my fart blew out full force with a deep, base filled sound that echoed in the toilet beneath me.
It felt so good not just to fart but the airy, bassy quality sound coupled with the corresponding reverberation of my anus is something I find really pleasurable. It sounds funny but it's a relief that is felt and heard and so it's doubly satisfying. It could be a little embarrassing if somebody heard outside the bathroom heard me but I was always taught that I am taking care of my body when I use the toilet and so I think there definitely something mature and honorable about being honest with your bodily functions and letting loose.
I fart a lot through out the day and to be honest I don't fart very much when I have to poop but there is something about those deep airy toilet bowl farts that is just so satisfying! I wish I had more toilet bowl farts while pooping but oh well. I don't blow farts in my pants loud around others just to save them embarrassment. I strictly justify farts and poop full force in the toilet. I never go to the toilet just to fart though unless I'm having problems with diarrhea
It really took into my 20s before I challenged myself to be honest with with myself about my bodily functions and think about how comforting, pleasing, and freeing it is to enjoy as much of my pooping experience as I can. It has been a rewarding experience because for me it has turned the toilet from shameful place to sit into a comforting and pleasurable place to sit. That may seem kind of silly but it really does feel like a mature and healthy attitude. It's so easy to go in public restrooms too and to be honest it's bonding when I hear other people's sounds on the toilet. There is something comfortably human about it and I like that. I find myself taking a stall that next to an occupied one cause it feels good to join in rather than separate. The more poopers in a row I can be with the better. Maybe it's weird but I like it.
Anyway, I really enjoy and prefer it when I'm able to fart on the toilet as opposed to in my pants or naked, etc. Enjoy a good poop everybody, LOL!
Emily & Molly's Farting Etiquette and Squatty PottyEmily & Molly - When I was younger, I used to do farting pranks mostly in school or in public towards girls to get their reactions. But, I don't do it anymore because I started to realize that some girls may get offended if I did that around them. Also, they could tell people about what I did to them and you know what that leads to.
To be honest, I feel more comfortable farting around girls than guys. It should be the other way around, but I'm not sure how I managed to feel that way.
Squatty Potty: I've recently been putting my legs on a stool so that I could poop easier. It's been working well for me because I've read that people should be in a squat position while they poop instead of just sitting on the toilet. Although, I've never had any problems pooping by just sitting down in the past. It's supposed to be healthier for you and your bowels. It's also supposed to make you feel completely empty after you go as well.
comments & stuffTo: After School Emily it sounds like had a major cleanout.
To: Anna J great story.
To: Abbie great story about you and your friends.
Well that's all for now
Sincerely Brandon T
PS. I love this site
Thank you, Steve, for saying that you would be interested to hear about my accidents and that others might too.
My poo accident happened nearly two years ago. My husband and I were on holiday and had gone out early for a long walk. On the way back to the car I was starting to feel a need to go to the loo. I told my husband and he said that we would find somewhere as soon as we could. There was nowhere I could go, no cover and,though still early, there were people about.It quickly got worse and worse. I was getting quite upset and told my husband I might not make it. Only a few minutes later and it started to come out. I was mortified as I told Chris (my husband) that it was coming in my trousers. By the time we reached the car I had completely filled my knickers. I hoped no one was near enough to smell me. They would have been in little doubt about what had happened!
There were not many cars in the car park and at the far side was a clump of bushes with nobody there. Chris helped me clean up as best I could. We found a plastic bag in the car and put my ruined knickers and trousers in them and then threw them in a rubbish bin. Back at the hotel, Chris went and got a skirt for me to put on and then I went in and had a good bath. I still shudder to think of it.
About five years ago, Chris had gone up to London by train. I usually go to meet him. Unless it is dark, I park at the back of the station, a few hundred yards away. It saves getting in the crush at the station and also parking on the road saves paying. On this occasion, the train was late and I had obviously miscalculated and was starting to need to wee quite badly. There were people going by so I could not discretely squat by the car. I didn't want to move in case I missed Chris. It got so bad and the train had still not come when I decided it was time for drastic action. Really, I had no choice. I did not want to do it in the car seat so I got out, stood quietly by the car and did it in my trousers. Then I got a cushion that was on the back seat, put it on the passenger seat and sat there, leaving Chris to drive home. When we reached home, I took the cushion in with me to wash because it had soaked some of the wee from my trousers. Chris asked why I was taking the cushion from the car and I had to admit how I had wet myself.
I think I had best leave it there for now but I will write about my other disasters soon.
Saturday, April 08, 2017
replies and a storyTo Abbie - thanks for your reply. Have you ever had a total accident or just a lot of near misses? I was really embarrassed that it happened - I've had plenty of near misses, but nothing this bad.
To the poster about the girl waiting for the bus - sometimes people don't want to go to the loo because they're embarrased to say in front of their friends, or maybe they didn't want to miss the bus. I can't speak for anybody else, but I know I would only try to hold myself if I was super desperate. Also, when I was younger I'd often put off going to the loo if I was doing anything more exciting. I probably still do, actually!
Well it's been a bit sunnier here recently and last weekend some friends had a picnic in the large park on the hills outside the city centre. It was a lovely day as it was so sunny! After a few hours I felt a need to have a wee so I excused myself and went towards a wooded area which had some bushes to go behind. I found a reasonably hidden area, then hitched up my skirt and pulled my red knickers down, squatted on the ground and did a wee, which was very relieving. As I was about to come out I saw another girl who looked like another student, she was petite and blonde, and squatted up against a tree before doing quite a long wee on the ground. I walked past her and we shyly smiled to each other and she said "Sorry, when you've gotta go!".
Latest storyHi everyone, as promised another story!
Today my friend Lucy spent the day round my house, we had lunch and then Lucy and I went up to my room. It was a real mess, there were books and bags everywhere and clothes all over the floor. I said "Sorry its such a mess in here, I haven't got round to tidying up!" I blushed slightly as I kicked a few pairs of dirty pants under my bed. Lucy said "Don't worry, my room is a total pigsty too!" As we were sitting around I felt a tightness in my belly and realised I would probably want a poo before too long, the last time I went was three days ago. As I mentioned in my last post I've been quite constipated lately so I hoped it wouldn't be too much of a struggle. I'd noticed Lucy squirming around, just then she said "I need to have a poo, you can come in with me if you want so we can keep chatting," and she went into my ensuite, I followed her in and sat on the floor. Lucy pulled down her black leggings and white pants and sat down, she weed for a bit and then her belly started to tense and I could tell she was concentrating on her poo. She started to pant a bit and could only talk in between pushes so I knew she was having to strain quite hard. "Sorry about this, I think I'm a bit constipated," she admitted after about 10 minutes of trying with no result.
"When did you last have a poo?" I asked, feeling a twinge in my belly and realising my own need was getting more urgent. Lucy paused and said, "Ummm, I don't think I've been for a couple of days, I guess I should've tried but its hard to remember when you don't feel like you need to go!"
"Yeah, I know what you mean, I wish I could have a poo more often then I might be less constipated as well!" I replied. After a few more pushes Lucy said "I've got a massive log stuck half way out of my bum and I'm gonna have to push really hard to get it out!!" She reached behind herself and pulled her bum cheeks apart, as she did so I could see she was bearing down, she must have been pushing pretty hard as she went really red and made a loud grunt when she relaxed. After another few pushes like that she gasped, "Its nearly out!" Sure enough soon after she moaned and I heard a splash as the log dropped. I started to squirm around, my poo was starting to press against my clenched bum and I knew I'd need to get on the toilet soon. "Are you nearly done, only I want a poo as well!" I said, as Lucy started to push again. "Oh sorry, I'm nearly done, I didn't realise you needed to go too!" she panted, shortly after I heard a couple of plops as some smaller pieces came out and then a sigh of relief. I could feel I was in danger of losing it, I knew if I had to wait much longer my poo would start to poke out and I'd get skidmarks in my pants which I wanted to avoid if possible. Lucy took some toilet paper and said "Right, I just need to wipe, you can go now!" As she stood up and moved over, her pants and leggings at her knees, I quickly pulled down my jeans and lilac pants and sat on the warm seat. Luckily I'd managed to sit before my poo started poking out, so my pants were clean! I relaxed and felt the log starting to come out, as usual it was a big fat one and I moaned slightly as I felt it stretching my bum. "Are you OK Abs?" Lucy asked, by now she had finished wiping and I scooted forward on the seat so she could throw the paper away.
"Yeah, its just a really fat one!" I said as I felt it easing out, Lucy pulled up her pants and leggings, washed her hands and then sat on the floor to wait for me. The tip of the log was out by now but it had stopped moving on its own so I knew I'd need to start pushing. I took a deep breath and bore down, as I pushed I felt the log slide out a bit more but when I relaxed it got sucked back up so I knew I'd have to strain for as long and as hard as I could with each push. "I haven't had a poo for a few days, I must be a bit constipated too!" I said. I pushed again and couldn't help grunting. "Sorry, whenever I stop pushing it gets sucked back up my bum!" I said. "Yeah, I just had that as well, to be honest the last few times I've been for a poo I've had the same problem and its really annoying!" Lucy replied.
"I know what you mean, pretty much every time I have a poo at the moment the tip comes out fine but then after that I find it really hard going," I said. I gave four massive pushes and made really loud grunts, luckily Lucy had had a difficult poo as well so at least it wasn't just me! Luckily that did the trick and the massive log plopped down into the loo, splashing my bum! I did another few pieces and then I was finished. I tore off some loo paper as I had a wee, and then wiped my bum before pulling up my pants and jeans and washing my hands. Lucy and I went back into my room and watched telly for a bit. I hope you enjoyed this story, bye for now!
Karen C. from Cali
Spinach diet fiasco from way backAnother blast from the past, an account of a weird spinach diet I tried years ago. This is a blowout diarrhea story I know you'll like so read on or skip down to read about my early enema experiences,, etc.
-maybe I'm showing my age here (rest assured, despite my age I happen to be a very attractive brunette or so the guys think, and not a day goes by that i get attention from guys more than half my age, and I get noticed by guys in their 20s! My secret? Well I'm not sure but I try to do something active each day in the fresh air, do a hard workout once a week at the gym, and I eat lots of fresh ???? and fruits so maybe that helps! Most people now think I'm in my 30s or early 40s, and I can feel guys' eyes staring at my waist, ,my boobs, and hips and butt when I'm out in public! I can even feel the eyes on me when guys look at me and it makes my day.
I always get compliments on my hairstyle which is a combination of late 60s/mid 70s/early 80s. My hair is very thick, slightly wavy, and I keep straight bangs in front sometimes with a middle part, thick on the sides and just below my ears, and thick in the back just below the neckline but layered and kept wavy in back and on the sides and I get my nape shaved once a month and hairline cleaned up with a razor ; my hair is natually light brown/auburn--I color it twice a month to hide the grey).
So well, anyways, in yesteryear my oldest boy was in school then, so it was a normal thing for me to take my youngest boy downtown shopping with me then. I read something in a tabloid magazine about weight loss, and long story short, I bought an enema bag at a drug store in the shopping center, and when we went grocery shopping I also bought a large amount of fresh spinach which I cooked with nothing but enough water to steam it with beef boullion cubes. The diet stated to steam the spinach until tender and consume nothing but that for three days for meals and in between if feeling hungry, so I did just that. I cooked the spinach in a four quart pot and kept it in the fridge and ate from it each time I felt hungry.
The first day I took an enema about every three hours. On the second day of my diet, my youngest son, around age three at the time, came into the bathroom and asked what I was doing, so I honestly replied "washing out my ass". He wanted to try too, but I told him this is only for girls and that "boys don't need to wash out their ass". But he was welcome to stick around and watch me. For some reason he wanted me to put my feet up on the edge of the bathtub while I did my enemas, like he'd seen me do before on the previous day.
Well, after the second day I didn't feel so good, feverish, no energy, stomach cramps, lethargy, bad headache, pukey/nauseous and other flulike symptoms, maybe those were detox symptoms. Took all the energy I could muster to cook supper; I didn't eat but a few bites and neither did my youngest boy because he doesn't like oven bbq chicken. After supper my hubby and older boy went outside to piddle around with old lawn mowers, while my youngest and I sat around in the living room watching Sesame street. Feeling got worse and thought i might feel better if i could just puke everything out of my stomach and be done with this awful diet. I took my youngest son outside and let him ride his bike, then I pitched wiffle balls to hm for him to bat, then I felt sick but not quite bad enough to throw up so we went inside and I turned on the TV and I changed into pajamas.
The TV show Zoom was on. I put some powdered mustard in a glass and filled it up with warm water and guzzled it down, to make myself throw up to feel better. On the show there was featured a recipe for making homemade pretzels, so my little guy and I made them and it turned out pretty well--the secret was to brush the pretzels with beaten egg to make them brown. After about 90 minutes I felt the mustard water kick in and my stomach start to churn and so I grabbed my son and had him follow me to the bathroom. Why? He asked. So I told him I was about to puke and he might like to watch, I thought he'd get a kick out of it, it'll be funny (boys like gross stuff, right?). I bent over the toilet and started throwing up stringy green slimey strands of spinach--the look on his little innocent face was priceless, and he kept his distance! My vomit was yelllowish clear and thick, with slimey long strands of spinach hanging from my mouth and into the toilet and I had to keep breaking it off my lips. I threw up several times until the spinach quit coming up and it was just yellowish water. When I was able to stop I felt lots better and then I felt diarrhea coming on, so I went for it--nothing but clear water, he stuck around for that, too, he got a good laugh. Felt tons bettter after emptying my stomach. The diarrhea was lots of gas, clear water with spinach leaves in it. Didn't feel sick anymore after that was done, actually felt quite great and a little bit hungry later!
I did feel a lot better after the final diarrhea episode and after getting all the spinach out of my stomach, now I had an appetite for some real food so I made the two of us some macaroni and cheese, but we were still hungry so I washed up and changed into a blouse and slipped into a pair of slacks and shoes, and took my little guy to a local dime store to look around a bit, we got the usual popcorn and Icees ,and I bought a Bonnie Tyler album and a Credence Clearwater album for me, and a gun and holster set for him, then just as it was getting dark we went to a burger place to get him the regular combo, and I got myself a big double cheese slawburger and strawberry shake, this was before chain fastfood places were abundant--we shared a jumbo order of fries, and before leaving I bought a couple extra sandwiches and fries for hubby and my youngest boy for a snack later after they got finished tooling aroud in the workshop. Woke up feeling queasy again later that night at around 3am, almost felt like throwing up but I didn't, I think the big cheeseburger I'd eaten earlier helped, but I did have the last round of spinach diarrhea, it was green water and had a few remaining spinach leaves in it.
Soooo, moral of the story is if you want nonstop hourly diarrhea, buy a quantity of fresh spinach and eat nothing but that for a couple days--I guarantee you'll be cleaned out, just be preared for the side effects and only do it on a day you won't have to go to work for the next couple days! Can't say as to whether the diet works or doesn't as I didn't stick to it for the full week, but I you just want to clean out your stomach then I can't think of a better way! Looking back I think that just adding the spinach to a regular diet would have beneficial effects without the sickness I experienced from going all-spinach. My weight was down a few pounds afterwards, and the seat of my pants baggy for a week or so after this gross "diet", so maybe it's good for some people, use caution and trust your judgement.
End Stall Em
Doors and LatchesI think I was about 8 or 9 and still having troubles with stalls and their doors. This was true both at school and in other public restrooms.
At school, it was several things. In kindergarten, we had 2 toilets right off our classroom. Not too many ways you could mess up with that. Then beginning in 1st grade we used the larger bathrooms that all 600-some students used. Now each bathroom had a long line of toilets. Some of the toilets had doors; some didn't. If I had to wee, and it was during class-time, I preferred not having to deal with the door because they had latches that were hard on my fingers and hand. And hearing that latch snap shut just kinda scared me.
Now for a crap. I figured I would be on the toilet for a little longer, and if a class came in during their break ....well I guess I was kinda modest. So I needed to use a toilet with a door and if the latch hadn't been taken off, I was reluctant to use it. That didn't work because sometimes I would be sitting with my clothing on my knees when a student would come in and throw the door open. It would crash into me. Some of the younger girls would be embarrassed and say they were sorry, but I remember some of the older ones that would just sneer at me. And they would give me one of those 'What's wrong with YOU?' looks.
One girl who was really snotty blamed me for pooping her pants. She threw herself into the door expecting to throw herself onto the seat. Since she had a dress on, she didn't expect any lost seconds on yanking them down. With the surprise factor, I could see diarrhea rolling down her leg. There were a couple of drops on the floor before she took the toilet next to me. She was ranting to bad that I quickly wiped and went back to class. Then after lunch I went back in and dropped 1 more log.
Have any of you other ToiletStoolers had fears or interesting experiences with toilet doors or latches?