Hi. This seems like the right place to tell the most embarrasing story of my life.
Once a few years ago, I was in New York City. I desperately had to take a dump, but everyplace said no public restrooms. I finally went in a McDonalds. They had a no public restrooms sign too, but there were so many people on line for the bathrooms, I figured I'd blend in.
The line for the ladies room was really long, but there was no line for the mens room. I was about to shit in my pants! I knew I couldn't hold it, so I leaned in the men's room and said, "Excuse me, I'm a woman and I'm about to have an accident, can I please come in?" The bathroom was full of guys at the urinals and at the sinks. But one guy said, "Anyone mind if a woman comes in?" They all said no.
I went in. I couldn't see the stalls from the door, so I didn't see that they had no doors. There was one free stall, the other two there were guys on the toilet shitting. I groaned with embarrassment, but I'd rather crap in front of a bunch of guys than shit my pants!
I went in the free stall and unzipped my jeans and pulled them down just enough. I sat on the toilet, and felt wetness all over my butt. I realized I hadn't wiped off the seat and it had piss and cigarette ash all over it. It was nasty, but I was seated so I let it rip. It was loud and smelly, like FART...PLOP...PLOP...PLOP...FART...PLOP...FART...PLOP...PLOP
A couple of the guys at the urinals couldn't help but look back at me. Anyway, I peed, then went to wipe my ass. There wasn't any toilet paper! I was so overwhelmed with embarrassment by then, I didn't care. I pulled my panties and jeans up over my shit and piss covered ass and rushed out.
I wound up walking around for another hour before I found someplace private where I could wash off my ass. I wound up taking my panties off and throwing them out. That was a really gross experience, but I guess it was still better than shitting my pants.
The pissing playgirl
To: Wetguy, I haven't seen that post of you pissing your pants in the parking lot, but it sounds really sexy. And Bryian, thanx for your acknowledgment on my post. Today as any other day, I felt peepeeish. LOL! That's a good word for it. I was in a meeting at my part time job. I had on a midriff T-shirt and some form fitting shorts. Ok, I work at Hooters. And I have the hooters for it. :-) 36D, no stomach and a Jennifer Lopez ass."No Lie" Anyway, as I sat in the meeting, I let loose a dribble of pee as I relaxed my vagina. Sometimes by doing this, it relieves the pressure on the bladder. I discovered an art of pissing your pants, without actually soaking them. The meeting lasted for about 15 minutes, but when you have to piss; it can feel like an eternity. When the meeting dismissed, I got up and quickly ran to the restroom. while running, I let a little more out. This was turning me on. As I stood taking down my shorts, the crotch of my panties were damp. I sat on the toile! t and let it go. God that felt so good. But it felt even better while sitting in the meeting. :-) Until the next time, happy toiletstool fun! The pissing playgirl.
Pooping at the Beach:
Last year I was at the beach and I really had to go poop, so I didnt feel like going all the way to the bath house, so I went a little deeper, up to my chest and pulled down my bathing suit and pooped into the water! It was a long piece about 10 inches I swear! After I pooped I swam away and I guess the poop washed up on shore and some little kids were amused by the poop and poking it with sticks until a guy that looked like their father came by and picked up the poop with a napkin and through it in th trash can. At least I wasnt doing anything wrong, there were no signs that said "No pooping at the beach".
As a follow up to my last post about my seven year old nephew wanting to watch me on the commode, I talked to his mother about the incident. We both had a good laugh about it and she also said that the problem stemmed from him being an only child. She said that she spent a lot of time with him and when she used the commode he was always somewhere near and that he makes up excuses to come into the bathroom where she is sitting. We both agreed that it was a phase that he may or may not grow out of. She completely restricts him now from the bathroom while she is using it. I don't know why little boys are so interested in this aspect of the female. I thought that when he was in the bathroom with me that the smell would run him off. LOL. I asked my husband about being in the bathroom with me while I poopoo and he told me that he felt a certain closeness with me and that it kinda turned him on.
Hello everyone! This is FART LOVER AGAIN. I hadn't posted since the 900's pages. Well, I've been busy farting around. LOL. I have a lot of stories to share, but today I'll only share one. For those who may be interested, I am a 5'9 inches tall big boobs, round booty, 38year old American woman who works as an office assistant. Whew, that was a lot to say.:-) Anyway, I was in my office today and as usual, farting at my desk. Some of my farts stink, and some didn't. The U.P.S guy walked up to my desk and smiled, while holding a package underneath his arm. He sat the package down on my desk, and handed me the electronic signing pad. I took the pad and began signing my name. All of a sudden, he lets out a gut renching fart. I looked into his eyes in shock. He just smiled. I began laughing, as he started to laugh also. He was a 22 year old hunk. His body was physically fit, and a nice round butt. I was turned on by his blunt bodily functions. I asked him while handing the electron! ic pad back to him, "Are you married?" "Nope" He answered, with another round of small snapping sound farts. "Do you have a girlfriend?" I asked while smiling. He shook his head answering , "Nope" "Would you like to go out sometimes?" I asked. "OK" he shrugged. "Great, how about tonight?" "Ok, here's my number," he eagerly took a pen from his shirt pocket and took my sticky pad and dotted his name and number down. "Call me anytime," he smiled. I nodded replying, "I will." He smiled and nodded, then walked out of the door. Well, I got a date with a hot hunk of a guy, who's into farting just as I am. What luck huh? FART LOVER.
Since all of you are into surveys I thought it might be interesting to do one of my own.
1) How many of you remember being toilet trained for pee or poop?
2) Who was responsible for your training?
3) What age were you if you remember it?
4) What about it do you remember most?
5) Have you ever help a sibling iwth toilet training?
6) If so how?
My memory centers around my mother taking me in the bathroom and putting me on my potty chair while she used the toilet next to me.
The time I remember most was when she must have been very constipated because she strained and truggles with it for a long time before she got it out.- JW
Good morning to all. Here is my replies to Carmalita's survey.
1. My famous person that I would like to see pooping would be Cindy Brinkley
2. I enjoy watching my wife going. We buddy dump and pee alot.
3.My sister(when real young) girlfriends, and my wife. Down to my knees when alone or down to my feet when not.
4. Sometimes; Brushing my teeth or shaving.
5. Sometimes to my thighs when I'm alone or down to my feet when I'm not.
6.Most of the time there is only a light oder but when its loose it can be deadly!
9.Most of the time mine are quite knobby firm and in length is 10"-18" and 2" or more around. Most of the time they will pass out with no pushing at all but the speed does very.
Hello....I just love this site :o) Carmalita your stories are awesome!!!
I was in the bathroom at work today and had just finished peeing so was out washing my hands, fixing my hair...stuff like that when in barged 3 ladies. Soon all 3 stalls were occupied.....one let out the loudest fart ever and nearly made me jump 5 feet...LOL She said excuse me and proceded to let out this heavy stream of pee. The other 2 ladies just peed and left while this one was going to be awhile. I decided since I was still on lunch break that I would touch up my make-up so I could be in there a while longer. Soon I hear her grunt and let out 2 more loud farts......after about 5 minutes the solid material started plip plip plopping into the bowl. She was silent for another 5 before grunting again and letting out what must have been the grand finale since it made a loud SPLOOSH!!!!! as it hit the water. Then she tore off what seemed like mounds of toilet paper and I decided it was time for me to get back to work. What a great potty break.......hope to have more! like it!!!!!!
I also like to buddy dump with friends.
CIAO for now...Meredith :o)
Well, me and the girlfriend didn't get to go camping this weekend. Heavy rain late Friday and Saturday :-( So we stayed home and did things, which is just as good ;-) Some responses now:
Wetguy: yeah, pissing in your bathing suit in the water is a great feeling. My girlfriend normally would have gone in her bikini in the water, too, but she didn't want to get in the water since we were about to leave and head home (can't have wet seats in my car!!). Not like there is a whole lot of fabric on her, but still, she thinks about things :-) She was a little frisky anyway that day and I think she wanted to have me in a good "mood", so she gave me the pee show in the sunset :-)
Bryian: yeah, it was a bit odd to have everyone who had to go go in the woods, but it's 100% true! I really didn't watch to see what any girls or guys were up to in the woods, for I wasn't as interested as I am now. I saw a couple girls squat behind bushes or guys walk behind trees a couple of times, but I didn't see anything else of any great detail (nor did I pay any great attention). To my girlfriend on the beach, yeah, I was in high heaven...she got quite rewarded later in the evening, if you know what I mean. You can make it good for them or you can make it REALLY good ;-) Hopefully the weather will be decent next weekend and we'll get to go camping...might have a story or two from that if it happens.
Happy goings all!
I finally went to the bathroom! Last night I had eaten so much and I didnt poo until this morning after breakfast. I did what was almost a 12" poo and it was thick and soft and burned coming out. I had to wipe about 10 times and even use water on the toilet paper to clean up, messy stuff and smelly as well. I think it is the Spanish in me.
Michael M that was a funny story about working the the girls room. I did some contract work for the school district which put me in girls restrooms at all times of the day. The girls would come and go, looking a little surprised that I was there, but I never got the reaction that you had. I would be fixing a toilet, say, and they would watch or talk to me. It seemed that they enjoyed having a dude in there to talk to. I always left a janitor's cart propping the door open so that they knew work was underway, but they could come in if they wanted to, and tinkle. One time I was replacing some toilet seats and they were like: "Wow these are cool." They were the white plastic type that is deeply contoured.
Hola mis amigos,
Thanks to everybody for answering my survey. So many intriguing answers! I agree with many of them and some of them were quite hot! Thanks again. To the anonymous person who always thought I looked like that girl on the collage: Her eyes and face shape are just like mine, but my lips are very thick and my skin is really dark.
MICHAEL M: In your scenario of painting the girls' room , If it had been me, I wouldn't have screamed and run out. I'd have given you something to see, with lots of hard grunts and plops and something that would probably kill that smell of fresh paint!
AMANDA AND ALYSSA: It's great being so casual, huh? I loved your story. It reminds me of how I am with my friends. And isn't great when that big one finally falls?
VICARIOUS: WOW! I'd love to see Condoleeza Rice too!
RAGING UROPHILE: I've never had the problem in your survey here, but I'm sure it could happen. These are my answers:
a) shit in the urinal,or,if you are female, run into the men's room to shit in their urinal if no stalls are available. First, I would knock, then stick my head in the men's room and say "I'm a girl, and I've got an emergency and the ladies' is full, can I come in?"
b) Run into the opposite sex's restroom and risk having security notified. If I got no answer, then yes.
c) run outside and shit in public in front of others. Or
Never. I'd find a secluded spot somewhere, even if it was behind a car.
d) shit your pants. Never in public. Trust me, when you shit your pants, everybody knows it.
ADRIAN: Thanks for the nice words hon.
SHEILA: I'm glad you like my stories. I'll try to keep them coming. I hate having to poop hard when I have my period also, for exactly the same reasons you mentioned.
AUSSIEROD: I have no idea where it's at, but in my old posts here, I wrote about an experience with a friend named Tesa that was similar to yours and your gf. She sat on my lap, only with her back to me, and pooped between my legs while I was going. We had the toilet so full of turds! Tesa was my girlfriend before I met my ex. (Now I'm partner-less again!Waaaa!) She's also Latina and speaks very little English (still! I'm trying to teach her, but she's stubborn). She also spent some time in prison and has some really bizarre stories about that. Interesting questions about the arousal thing Aussie, mi amigo. Usually, I don't really think about it, but there are those certain days...I don't masturbate or anything though. The toilet is not a comfortable place for that. However, sometimes when Nu sits down I get excited because she is so lovely. If anybody ever gets excited over a woman who makes lots of crackling and splashing noises on the toilet, then Nu is the girl to be! around! She sounds like a poop factory squeezing em out. Also, sometimes when she watches me I get excited because I know she likes it. I really love dropping my big ones for her. Also, I hold my pee a lot, sometimes for hours until I'm bursting. That makes me feel really good in that special way, and then, if I drop some turds at the same time, then yeah! It's nice. Also, pooping and peeing outdoors really does it for me. I like the idea that I might get caught.
Nu took an awesome dump this morning, talk about sound! First, I'll try to describe her for those who don't know her: Nu is about 5'4", 103 lbs., She has shiny straight black hair that falls a little below her shoulders with the real sexy bangs in front. Her eyes are almond shaped, dark, and like me, she has thick lips, and her face is wide and oval. her butt and thighs are perfectly rounded and tapered, like two beautiful peaches! This morning she got up out of bed (naked), sat down on the toilet and started farting and sighing. It was like ssspppppppllltttttttttt....ssspplttt.....nhhhhh.... I said "you'd better pay your gas bill babe," and she said "I'm doin it right now. I've got such a damn gut ache." Then the turds came:
Next came an "OOOAAANNNNN!..." heavy sigh of relief, then more turds plopping. I could smell it from bed and she got embarrassed and courtesy flushed. After her poop, she came back to bed and we both fell asleep for a bit longer. I'll take a nice steamy-creamy for her tonight!
Love you all, mis amigos!
Vicarious - I asked this once before of someone else, but never got a reply. Just what is a "Swedish double toilet"? Please describe.
Carmalita - Sorry, that was me who wrote, "I always figured you look something like the girl behind the "e" in the collage. Great survey," etc. Re #9, my average turd output is an 8 to 10 incher daily, longer at times, often in one piece, but sometimes with a smaller side dish. Sometimes my dump comes out in 3 or 4 pieces of a few inches each. Thickness is usually about 1.5 - 2 in. I almost never do any "rabbit pellets." Also, like you, I'm usually quick, like 3 min. or less.
MICHAEL M. - Wow thats amazing. You gotta blame the school mostly for that, tho, someone really screwed up on that one either not telling you or them. I cant believe that those girls would just get up and pull up their pants while still peeing, wouldn't that be more embarasing to be wet rather than let you see them a few more seconds? During my little problematic behaviors at school, there was a time (at the end toward the point when I was caught, when I was acting more stupid) that I tried to stand on the toilet and look over the stall. Well, not only was I to hesitant while standing there to actualy look, but someone at the sinks saw me and screamed "oh my god! what the f??? are you doing in here." I got back down feeling stuck in the stall while I heard her run out at tell her friends (laughing) that a "crack head" was in the bathroom. Amazingly, there were other girls in the stalls, and none of them figured out what was going on (or if they did, didn't react) and I was a! ble to sneak out undetected. This whole event, along with other more minor ones, most likly lead to my discovery within the next week or two. If I ever had to work in a girls bathroom, I would make sure to put a note in fear of being thought as a sex offender due to my past offenses.
Another Bathroom Encounter Story from my Friend.
Last week, I and one of my classmate ( a she) was at the wake of one of her relatives(may he rest in peace) which lies on a Funeral Parlor. THat place was unfriendly, specially those to women who want to use their toilet because it is located near their morgue. At that time, it is only the two of us who were at the wake so I'm kind of uneased. During the middle of the night (at 11:00 p.m.), she was complaining that her stomach was crumbling. I said to her "so what's the problem?". She said that the toilet is located beside the morgue and she's afraid of going alone. I have no choice but to accompany her to that spooky restroom. When we are at that place, I said to her that I will wait outside till she will be done but she requested me to accompany her inside the toilet 'cause she was affraid. I was shocked with her behavior at first but she gave me her hanky to blindfold myself and I do it. We rapidly entered the toilet room. "Just stay there" she said. Being blindfolde! d, I can't see but I clearly hear her unzipped her skirt and lowered it together with her panties. After that, she said that the rim was dirty followed by the sound of the bowl being moved so I pressumed that she placed her foot above the toilet. At that moment, the hanky slipped slightly so I was able to have 35% vision and I saw her position above the toilet. Her feet was above the rim. Her left hand was on the wall and the other holding her knee. Luckily, her private part was covered by her skirt. I saw her pee and expell diahrrea at the same time with her face looked normal. I asked her if she's fine and she replied that it's just another soft poop moment. The smell was awful but its normal. After that , she let out her fart and started to release soft poop but solid.I counted it 12 As I saw it. She sighed in relief and wipe herself. When we returned to the wake, she gave me thanks for being there but I kept silent because for what I've experienced and never told her th! at the hanky was loosed.
Hope you liked it. Peace to all.
When I was a kid, maybe seven or eight, my little "girlfriend" and I were playing in the woods, and both had to pee. I just walked to a bush, unipped my fly and peed standing up. I said to her, no it's your turn. So she pulled her pants and underpants down to her ankles, but instead of squatting, she just bent her knees a litte. She wound up peeing directly into her underpants and pants! By the time she was done and pulled them up, it looked like she had peed her pants. It didn't seem to phase her, because we kept playing for another couple of hours. After that, when she would pee in front of me, she'd squat all the way down. I guess that first time was the first time she'd peed outside!
1. What famous person would you most like to see taking a big poo? Serena Williams, I've read a few old posts about tennis players
2. What non-famous person would you most like to see taking a big poo? There is a nice looking girl at a dunkin donuts on my way to work I wanna see her go(I hope she is s gas chamber type girl too)
3. Have you ever been spied on while pooping? yes by my cousin when I was 10
4. Have you ever "killed two birds with one stone" by doing another thing while pooping to save time? (such as shaving, brushing teeth, putting on makeup.)I've only checked my voicemail
5. How far do you pull your pants down when you poop? to my knees
6. Which answer would you use to describe your smell: a. nuiscance b. unpleasant c. rodent killer d. death by gas chamber? B, unpleasant
7. Have you ever seriously kissed anybody while pooping? no
8. Who is your favorite type of person to see pooping, or would like to see pooping? (ex: white, AA, latino, asian, etc.) African American Woman
9. Can you describe your average turd output and then describe yourself so I can know you better? Age, how you look, etc.? medium sized, not wide, 1-2 turds per sitting. 20 year old african american male 6 ft 180 lbs, kinda look like Nelly. Combat Employee for Uncle Sam's Armed Rebillous Militant Youngsters (US ARMY for short)
I am a 48 year old male who enjoys my bathroom time to the utmost. There seems to be a connection between thinking and defecating. I do some of my best work in the bathroom and consider it one of lifes great pleasures.
There are times when things do not work out so well and i would like to relate one such incident that ocured when I was 20. I was over a girlfriends house or dinner and she served some delicious soup that was a tad too salty. After two servings I developed and undeniable urge to spew forth a deluge of diarrea. I dare not even squeak out gas as I knew liquid would follow. She had only one bathroom and it was close to the kitchen. I had a bad feeling about this load and knew I could not drop it in her throne with all the attendant gas, sputtering and foul odor.
I told her I was feeling sick and she said I looked kind of pale and sweaty. I bolted for the door and ran to my car. The trip home was only one mile but i felt my chances of making it were slim to none. My mind raced as my butthole took control of my being and for that moment became the focus of my world. I raced home fearing a traffic accident and the embarrasment of splooging in my pants. I held it and raced up the walk opened the door and burst in, in a sheer panic. I could feel the release start to happen, and as I made my way to the room with percelain goddes inside, the door was locked. I banged on the door and in a pleading voice asked who was in there and could they come out. It was my brother, the king of bathroom readers and thinkers, he informed me he had just sat down.
I was on the verge of passing out when I remembered the cat's litter pan down the basement. I ran down the stairs and dropped my pants in a last ditch effort to salvage what dignity I had left. I squatted over the pan and a huge river of the worst loose stool cascaded down and continued for about a minute. There were tears in my eyes and a great sense of relief, however when I looked down I realized I had missed the pan and the full load went into my pants. Needless to say, there was no paper there as the cat did not require any.
This is the poop lover. If anyone wants to see a more comlete list of famous people i want to see poop, ask me to post it.
The poop lover answering some surveys.
1. Im age 20
2. Im male
3. I pooped in my pants many times. We all did as a baby.
4. I pissed in my pants many times. We all did as a baby.
5. I did poop in my pants at school before.
6. I did piss in my pants at school before.
7. I did piss in the shower before.
8. I never pooped in the shower but I want to try it.
1. do u like someone with you while u poop? M or F? no.
2. do you like to be with someone when they are pooping? I wish I could be with some people when they poop.
3. do you like to read when you poop? no. I just want to enjoy the moment.
4. How much do you poop? Size, smell, etc.? I poop 2 to 4 everytime. The maimum I poop is 6 at a time, but never any less than 2. The size is 6 to 9 inches long and 2 inches wide.
5. How long do you take to poop? 10 to 20 minutes.
1. Do you like to cross stall chat? no.
2. When is it ok to do so? never.
3. Why are people moved to talk in the bathroom? I dont know. How should I know? It might be different for each person.
4. I am male
survey 4 is Carmalita's survey:
1. What famous person would you most like to see taking a poo?
A whole lot of people. I may not remember them all right now. Sandra Bullock, Jennifer Lopez, Hallie Berry, Hallie Eisenberg, Makenzie Rosman, Jessica Beil, Reagan Gomez Preston, Beyonce Knowles, Farah Fath, the Olsen twins, Jodie Sweetin, Jennifer Aniston, Ashli Amari Adams, Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Nadia Bjorlin, Renee Jones, Kristen Storms, Arianne Zuker, and many other good looking females.
2. Non famous people I want to see poo I will keep unnamed.
3. I never been spied on while pooping.
4. I never did something while pooping to save time.
5. I pull my pants down to my ankles.
6. My smell is unpleasant.
7. I never seriously kissed someone while pooping but I want to.
8. I would like to see anykind of people, as long as they are good looking females.
9. My average turd is 9 inches long and 2 inches wide. They were bigger and smaller before.
I remembered an incident that happened to me a few years back. Once after using the commode, one of my rings fell off into the water. When I wipe I usually just slightly lift my butt off the seat a little and wipe from behind and when I'm finished I'll make a quick swipe to the front. After my frontal wipe, I dropped the toilet paper and my ring went with it. My heart sank as I got up and pulled my pants up and looked into the commode. My first thought was to grab something to move my poo poo out of the way, but I was afraid that this would cause it to go further down into the hole. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a pair of rubber gloves and back into the bathroom I went. I put the gloves on and carefully sank my hand into the water and pushed the toilet paper out of the way revealing one long poo poo log and a bunch of little turds all around the longest one. My ring was nowhere in sight. I held my breath and gently grabbed the the turd and pulled it out of the hole, it! was one of my usual 14 or 15 inch logs. As I pulled it out, I could finally see the ring. I carefully shifted the turd to my left hand and stuck my index finger down into the whole and retrieved the ring, slightly coverd with poo poo. LOL. I dropped the log back into the water and went over to the sink and washed my ring and hands thoroughly and then applied alcohol to both my hands and ring. I flushed the toilet and gave a big sigh of relief.
I had to take a patient to the x ray department the other day, that's two floors up from the ward. I was about to go the loo when the sister told me to take the patient to x ray. On the way the pain in my ???? got worse and by the time I got to x ray I needed to poop bad, but the rule is you must never leave a patient unattended and there was nobody to take over from me. I must have gasped as I fought to hold myself cos the patient (a man) asked me if I was ill. I told him no but I needed to go to the loo. I was pooping myself as I spoke, I could feel it wet and sticky in my panties. He told me not to be a fool but to go and he promised me he wouldn't tell sister. I really had to go so I pushed his wheelchair to the public loo's. Inside I quickly went into a stall and pulled up my skirt and dropped my panties, as I sat on the pan I started to poop. I just sat holding my ???? as the poop just poured from me, I didn't have the runs, I was just really soft and loose,! I was peeing and pooping at the same time. As I went I looked at the crotch of my panties (new ones) they were full of poop and, delicately I slid them off my feet and put them in the sanitary-towel bin. I couldn't enjoy my poop as I would have liked cos of my patient, as it was it took me over ten minutes my bum was very dirty and it took me lots of paper and quite a while to clean myself. I was so anxious that I forgot to flush the pan so somebody else would have to flush away my panful. I also had to finish my shift pantieless and had to be very careful about bending over to avoid giving somebody an eyeful of my rear end. I did thank the patient I was very grateful that he helped me as he did.
I have heard that girls have bigger bladders than guys and have more holding power. (holding their pee) But I have wondered if that's the case, how come I have seen more girls who r desperate to pee than guys?
Matt from MD
Hey I haven't posted in a while. Yesterday, I had some bagels with cream cheese, eggs, and lox (smoked salmon). That really upset my stomach and I had runny shit all day. Not that it's relevant, but I've been getting a lot of attitude from those freshmen haters. Oh well. I dont look like a freshman, so at least not everybody recognizes me as one lol.
Carmalita: I love your posts so much. Whatever happened to Patsy?
Amanda: I really liked your post. Are you a freshman or are you an 8th grader? Tell us what happened on the phone with Lizzy and tell some more stories!!!
South Park has Mr. Hankey. He comes only at Chrismas. In American Pie, Seann William Scott gave one of the boys a laxative. I am sure that everyone here has heard of these 2 shows. Will post again soon.
Eric in chicago: He was 15 at the time and I'm now 19. He was a medium build guy but ate quite a lot without putting on weight so hence it came out of his rear end as logs. I'm sure the logs were quite hard so he couldn't break them up to flush down his home toilet. Whenever we had a science practical in school he would most of the time go off to the toilet to let out his bombs. Took him 10 mins or so and I suppose he was discreet about it.
Another story. A few weeks ago this total babe went to the toilet at work. I herad the door shut and her lock it. The alls were quite thin. Then after 5 mins I heard a load fart and what must have been a log dropping into the toilet. Then a flush and she appeared back out the door. I can't believe a babe like that could have done that.
Last weekend, my wife and I went to a private campground for a spring overnighter with some friends. The weather can be iffy this time of year, but it was really nice the whole time. When I saw the toilet house, my face beamed. It was a wooden structure with, as usual, the women's on one side, men's on the other. The men's had a long, trough urinal along the outer wall, next to the wash sinks, below a long, screen window. Against the inside wall was a row of toilets, separated by wooden partitions with doors. I'm guessing that the women's toilets were back-to-back with the guys', just behind that wall. The amazing thing was that there was nothing at all between that dividing wall, about 10 feet high, and the roof. The space was completely open. That meant you could hear every sound coming from the other side - and that the women could hear the guys just as easily. It took no more than a trip to the john just about anytime to hear the femmes peeing and dumping, brus! hing teeth, and primping on the other side - sometimes alone, sometimes in pairs or groups talking to one another, sometimes moms and daughters.
But my favorite was when I had to take a dump early Sunday morning. Few campers were up yet, but luck was with me, I guessed, when I saw an attractive, 30-ish woman with long, light brown hair and dressed in jeans and a blouse enter the woman's side as I went into the mens. I'm not sure whether she saw me. I wondered what would happen if I sort of mirrored what she was doing, so when I heard her close and lock her stall door, I did the same, making no effort to be quiet about it. As I heard her pulling down her jeans, I did the same. Then I sat down and relaxed, waiting for her to make the next move so I could follow suit.
Like some of you here who have been in such situations, I tried not to expect more than a pee from the other side, but, of course, I was really hoping there would be more to her performance than that. For now, though, there was nothing at all. Then she did start to pee. It was a pretty strong stream that lasted for about half a minute. I didn't need to pee just then, or I would have. Was that all from my neighbor?, I wondered. Would she wipe, flush, and leave? More silence from behind the wall. My expectations rose :-) I pushed a little bit to make my own load move into the corral, ready to be sent on its way if my neighbor did the same. Then the silence was broken, not by a fart, but by her soft grunting. This was it! I could hear my neighbor quietly catch her breath and then exhale - Nhhhh. Nhhh. Nhhhh. Then more silence, but this time followed by a little grunt and a KERPLOP! I waited for her to pull off some TP, but there was only more silence.
It was my turn. I actually had to go pretty badly and had been holding back. Now I gave a slight push and a small fart erupted from me. Then came a long turd that slid out slowly and felt so good that I let out a soft moan without even thinking about it. My jobbie fell silently into the bowl, and then I, too, started to pee. I could have wiped right then, but who knew if I was done? It was the perfect reason to stay seated - and to keep listening.
As before, my neighbor started to grunt softly again. This time, though, it seemed a bit harder for her, and some of her grunts were more audible. There was the same gentle catching of breath, then a silence, and then another KERPLOP! I had a winner. Now, would she pull off the TP and wipe? No. Once again came the sound of soft grunting, and, once again, silence and then another KERPLOP! This time, though, she let out a big sigh of relief. Now the TP started to roll, so I pulled some off, too, and began wiping. I hurried, so that I could flush just after she did. Now I heard my neighbor pulling up her jeans and getting ready to leave. FLUSH! I waited a few seconds, then FLUSH! I moved to the sink and washed up as she was doing the same. I was afraid the electric hand dryer she was running now would mask the sound of her leaving, but I managed to hear the screen door open on the other side, and I made my exit, too.
I was simply going to be on my way and leave it at that, but here came my neighbor around to my side of the building, seeing me come out the door, on her way back to her camp site. Our paths crossed just long enough for us to smile at one another and for me to say, "At a busy place like this, it's nice to be able to have a restroom all to your self for a few minutes, isn't it?"
"Oh, yeah. I wouldn't say I was alone, exactly, though," she said with a grin, "but, yeah, I know what you mean. At least I feel a lot better now. You, too?" she asked.
I nodded and smiled and we both said, "See ya" and went on our separate ways. It was one of those toilet encounters of the second kind that will stick with me for a while.
Well, fellow toiletstoolers, this is where it gets a lot busier for me, covering for a colleague who's on leave until late July. I won't be posting as often, but I'll be checking when I can. Have a splendid summer - or winter, for my friends down under. Take care, all!
Please post some enema stories, we all would like to hear it.
Enemas and Enema bags Foutain syringes. etc.
1. What famous person would you most like to see taking a big poo? I can think of five off the bat.... Britney Snow (American Dreams), The red head girl on the 70's show, Trish Stratus, Stephanie Mcmahon, and Julia Louis Dreyfus
2. What non-famous person would you most like to see taking a big poo? My best friend's 22 year old sister
3. Have you ever been spied on while pooping? no
4. Have you ever "killed two birds with one stone" by doing another thing while pooping to save time? (such as shaving, brushing teeth, putting on makeup.) I brush my teeth, sometimes read the newspaper, used to play the old black and white gameboy.
5. How far do you pull your pants down when you poop? Down to ankles
6. Which answer would you use to describe your smell: a. nuiscance b. unpleasant c. rodent killer d. death by gas chamber? Normally it'd be unpleasant, but I eat a wide range of food and the righ combo makes it a rodent killer (like as we speak)
7. Have you ever seriously kissed anybody while pooping? Sexy thought but no
8. Who is your favorite type of person to see pooping, or would like to see pooping? (ex: white, AA, latino, asian, etc.) I like white females a lot, and black females too, which are much more rare for me to see. Latinos and asian follow in that order.
9. Can you describe your average turd output and then describe yourself so I can know you better? Age, how you look, etc.? On average I turn out a bunch of medium turds or two to three big bulky ones. I am a haitian american guy, 21yrs old, 5'8", 181lbs, athletic and in good but not great shape, muscular legs and arms but not overly. I have dark brown hair and eyes, brown skin, and my butt is kinda jiggly, which I hate. And I love to eat meat.
To Raging Urophile: I would go with choice B and let the females know it's urgent. I don't take kindly to double standards in regards to "oh yeah it's ok for a girl to go in the guy's bathroom but not vice versa". I'll argue to death with the authorities on that.
To posters: hi everyone, good to see these posts.
Wow that's some pic.
Must say I've loved the informal surveys--they really open the discussion up beyond a more basic description of the function, so to speak.
Here's my crack at it:
1) Air freshener: Do you think using air freshener is:
2) Reading material: What's the best thing you've ever read exclusively on the pot:
a) Book: (please name: )
b) Magazine: (please name: )
c) Other: (please name: )
3) Color: What's your favorite poop color
(please use colors/weights and measures)
4) What ethnic food gives you the most normal poo:
5) What ethnic food gives you the most hard poo:
6) What ethnic food gives you the most fragrant poo:
7) Which five people would you like/be most honored to follow onto the toilet, knowing there's no air freshener around?
8) What was it like for you to encounter poo smell from a person of the opposite sex for the first time?
Just a note on ecology here... I'm not the "greenest" guy in the world, but I am concerned about how well we are - or aren't - taking care of the earth's resources. Maybe some of you wondered what kind of flusher that was on the pipe behind the recent masthead girl who was hovering over the toilet whilst covering her topless self. It's a kind of jet flush valve seen a lot in Germany and Austria. You can push it down just a little to flush away a pee, or push it down all the way to say so long to your poop. That makes it a real water saver. It also comes in a home version - same concept, just not a jet flush. I wish devices like this were more common (or even available) in the US. I think we need to start thinking more about how much water we use. Take care, all!
anyway, i was talking with this new girlfriend I met on the net but not yet in person; on the phone again sunday night/monday morning from about 11:30 PM till 4:30 AM. finally I asked her how long it was since she had peed, before 10 PM was her last time. she told me that she'd been drinking lots of juices and water right before I had called the 2nd time as she wanted to be ready to allow me to hear her pee. finally about 3 AM I asked her if she did, and she told me " not really but I'll try " and brought the phone into the bathroom in her room sat down and began to pee. I could hear the tinkle sound as she urinated into the toilet bowl water for about maybe 20 seconds then stopped, as she told me she didn't have to pee that badly yet. I asked her what it looked like and she told me " its yellow, deep golden yellow and you could see the yellow stream coming out of me as it turned the water yellow." I asked what else does it look like and what else is there to see and she! told me, " my pee in the water and bubbles too " how much bubbles? "a little , about half the bowl at first mostly clinging to the sides now" . yeah it was cool and she said , " when you come over you can watch me pee and see for yourself. that would be cool and I will pee for you" .
1. What famous person would you most like to see taking a big poo? Heather Graham, Shakira
2. What non-famous person would you most like to see taking a big poo? Well, this girl named Alicia
3. Have you ever been spied on while pooping? Not that I know of...haha
4. Have you ever "killed two birds with one stone" by doing another thing while pooping to save time? I've clipped my nails and read.
5. How far do you pull your pants down when you poop? I take them off.
6. Which answer would you use to describe your smell: a. nuiscance b. unpleasant c. rodent killer d. death by gas chamber? It depends, usually c
7. Have you ever seriously kissed anybody while pooping? No
8. Who is your favorite type of person to see pooping, or would like to see pooping? Well, white or Hispanic girls. She's gotta have a really nice ass and a body to go with it.
Tuesday, April 29, 2003