Winnie the Poo

To Maryam

I read your touching post about your daughter Christa with tears running down my face. It was obvious that you loved her very much and did your very best to understand her and support her as she tried to cope with her autism. I too lost my beautiful and brilliant 34 year old son to drug abuse. Quentin (not his real name) had struggled with drug addiction, Hepatitis C, chronic pain and profound depression for many years. Of course, there is no way to understand how a parent feels when they lose a child, unless you have experienced it. But you are among friends here and you should know that Christa was a valued member of this community, and we will miss her. Thank you for writing and I pray that God will comfort you in your loss.


Accident in Pants

I noted Alexandria`s request for stories about accidents in pants.
I often wet my pants a bit due to continence problems...seeing the specialist in a few weeks and also seeing a continence nurse soon...anyway back to the story
Some years ago I was having investigations for bowel problems and had to have an x-ray. I was quite constipated and had to drink this strange tasting water prior to the x-ray.
I was put on the x-ray table and given an iodine injection and very quickly I got hot and desperate for an urgent poo...I would have loved a nurse or somebody to put a bed pan under me and I could have expelled the long awaited contents of my colon...the urge suddenly passed and I was fine...the x-ray concluded and I was driving home ..near home and needed to fart; I lifted my bum of the car seat and farted but it was a real loaded shart.. I drove into my drive way..nobody at home and as I got out of the car that desperate urge hit and out it came...the poo just poured out of my undies and trousers just bagged down...I ran in and sat on the toilet and heaps more came was such a big relief...the clean up was huge but worth it.
I do not advocate shitting in my pants but that was a welcomed exception.



Words cannot express the grief that I feel for you and for the pain that Christa went through.

May you find love and peace in this dark time. Prayers, well wishes and warm thoughts are with you.



To Maryam: I'm terribly sorry to hear about Christa. She was a wonderful young woman that I often wished I could have known better. I knew she was having a hard time, but had no idea it was like that.

I can promise that I'll never forget her, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who can say that. I hope we were able to give her at least some measure of comfort as she struggled. And thank you for sharing more about her.

I suppose it means little coming from a stranger like me, but thank you for being so good to her, for bringing her so much of what joy she did have and for being so understanding. I can tell you that every single moment of such means ten times more than it would to most when you're someone who is prone to being misunderstood in that way. And I'm very sorry for your loss. I can tell you loved her a great deal. And I'm sure that even if she had trouble expressing it in the ways another person might, she loved you a great deal too.

I know this isn't on-topic, but I do hope our mysterious friends who run this place can make an exception to the rule every once in a while.


Really loose toilet seats

At my middle school I'm finding that the bathrooms are getting worse in one way. Sure they are getting messed up by those that don't flush, throw towels into the toilet pans and sometimes even torn book covers and large pop containers, but in my opinion, I'm most upset by something else. Its the loose, and in some cases really loose seats. Yesterday, I went to the bathroom 3 times and all 3 times I was in a different part of the building, used a different toilet, and each time I seated myself my butt shook on the seat. I'm one of the youngest and physically smallest in my class. When I'm seated my feet are 1/2 to 1 inch off the floor so its already uncomfortable for me to be using these toilets. Like before 1st hour while I was weeing, I sneezed. So I leaned to my left to roll off some toilet paper to blow my nose with. In doing so, it seemed like the seat slipped an inch or two. I didn't jump off because I would have made a mess. It scared Kamdym, too, in the next stall when my hand hit the cubicle divide.

Then at lunch, the girl who was before me in line, had raised the seat. I really don't know why. But when I got in there and dropped it, it hit the bowl and bounced to one side a little. I tried to center it, but it was obvious that one of those rubber-like tabs under it that rests on the bowl was partly broke off. But I wasn't about to give the stall up and get back in line. So I pulled my underwear down and seated myself. Luckily my poo came fairly fast, but when I moved a little forward to get the larger part to come out, again I got scared that I was going to slide off. Wiping while I was still seated probably was a mistake, because my movement caused the seat to be thrown farther off the bowl. I also had to handle the toilet paper holder carefully because the front of it was badly cracked.

After school, Kamdyn and I go to the bathroom on the main floor before we start our walk home. We were the only ones in there. There were eight toilets. I used my hand to test the tightness of the first 2 seats; one even had the front 2 inches of the front broken off. The seat next to it was wet so Kamdyn took the middle stall. While Kamdyn weed, I quickly ran to my locker for my math book. I got back just as she was getting off the toilet, and I told her I would take her place. It was my most comfortable sit of the day and I was surprised how much wee I had in me because I was much more relaxed. Then as I slid off the seat, there was this creaky noise and it seemed that the back of the seat that's bolted to the bowl was causing the problem. She reminded me that I spend $4 a day on coffee and pop and that what goes in must come out.


To Maryam, and various life events

First of all, my condolences to Maryam. Thanks for sharing that with us. I can't really imagine what your family has gone through and I hope you and your family will persevere through this difficult time. I don't think there are many words that can really say what one needs when something like this happens, so all I can say is I'm sorry for your loss. I understand the difficulties that come with communication when living with autism, and I'm glad Christa was able to find something here that spoke to her. Though I haven't posted much, I've been a reader for a while, so I do remember her.

After that, it feels odd to make a normal post, but IIRC there are rules regarding percentage of post volume (?) so here goes.

I've personally had an odd week regarding digestion. Since I've been walking more often now I've definitely been feeling the effects, and that means many more close calls. Thankfully I haven't gotten there too late, but it is sometimes unnerving when I'm a block away from my house and my body is telling me to take care of business immediately. I'm aware of various reasons why it would happen in that manner. Still, it is a bit annoying that I'll be fine (though aware of a pressing need) for 20 or 30 minutes and then as soon as my building's in sight, that's it.

Emma recently has been having digestive issues of her own, though that's not really anything new. She had a resounding series of explosions while I was around, and I gave her a little massage during and afterward for a job well done. Also, she apparently had quite an experience when I wasn't with her, before work; she reported that she'd had a sizable output that looked like a half-sunken ship. I was a bit disappointed to have missed that, but there will be many more experiences in this regard, so that's okay.

Other responses -

Anon Office Person: Wow, that sounds kind of crazy. I'm glad to say I have never been that sick. Even when I have an actual stomach bug I just feel weak and vomity. I don't like throwing up at all though, and I think I used to have some sort of mental panic issue regarding it, though I'm better at not getting so freaked out now. Glad it had something of a happy ending.

Catherine: I don't think I said this yet, so congrats on the engagement. It did seem like it was just a matter of time though; from what you've said, you two really appear to be made for each other. About the toilet selfies thing, that seems great, and I'm sure he'll enjoy his honeymoon gift. Sounds like you had a good time at the bookstore too. I don't often go in public restrooms nowadays, oddly enough. It's not on purpose, but it just so happens that I don't often get the urge while in public buildings.

Mina: I'm sorry you had such a difficult experience reading about Sarah Jo. Sometimes, being upset emotionally can cause physical upset as well, as I'm sure you saw when you had diarrhea. On the plus side, it's brought you closer to your friend. I also think it's great how we're so well made (one might even say "fearfully and wonderfully") and how everything works: food goes in, waste comes out, life goes on.

Siford: If you have a problem then it's great you're trying to get over it, but please understand that even people who would go anywhere probably would be--at the least--apprehensive about using stadium toilets, especially doorless ones. I've only seen one bathroom that I'd consider worse than a bathroom at a sporting event, and whenever I think about it I can only be thankful that I didn't have to use it. Maybe baby steps would be more helpful?

That's all for now.

Maryam -

There is nothing strange about your post or hers It is very touching, and I am privileged to read it and get a better insight on the life of your awesome daughter as well as yourself, as I'm sure many of us on this forum are. My story is similar to hers. I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at the age of 11 or 12, and while it's something I will continually deny to anyone in person, the anonymous nature of this forum will prevent anyone besides us knowing otherwise. I believe to the fullest that it was caused by childhood vaccines, and exacerbated by ADD and anti-depression drugs. As this is not a forum for debate, I digress. I am involved on this site and enjoy various activities relating to what is discussed here. I enjoy peeing into containers and in different places, and occasionally loading my underwear or a diaper with poop and enjoying every involved sensation. I even enjoy peeing in a cup at the doctor's office. LOL. That said, perhaps there is a link sometimes present between autism/asperger's and these bodily functions. In the case of Christa, it was most definitely different than my own, but it is worth thinking about.

Whatever the case may be, there's no reason for you to be weirded out, which is a phrase of my own as well (mostly to describe how others feel about me) Whatever the case (and in this the anonymous nature of the website becomes a double-edged sword.) I and many others here would've loved to been able to correspond with her privately and share these sentiments to let her know she was not alone. I too experienced many other struggles you mentioned and in my 30s still do at times. God made us all different for a reason. I know I've touched lives because of it and I'm sure Christa did as well. If I may venture to guess that her religious beliefs are the same as my own, I am sure she is in Heaven and getting along 100 percent with everyone and like everyone else, without earthly encumbrances. So take heart, Maryann, knowing that she is loved there and was most certainly loved here as well. This story has shed light on my own situation and has given me hope. Godspseed.


To: Maryann, Re: Christa


I would like to extend my heartfelt sympathies for your loss of Christa.

I've been a long time reader/poster to this web site. I am disabled by cerebral palsy, spent much of my earlier life with other people with disabilities, and know first-hand the challenges that we
(the disabled) have, including using the bathroom.

I read all of Chista's postings, but unfortunately never responded to her as I never knew what to say that might have been helpful to her. Obviously, I now wish I had just weighed-in to say,
"Keep trying," or "Hang in there," or some other words of encouragement and support. I think it's fair to say she had many supporters on this web site and I'm sure many of us wish
she had stayed connected with us.


Mike P.


Dear Maryam

I would like to send condolence to you, from me and my friends, about the death of your lovely daughter Christa. I did not know her, I think she wrote on this site before I start, but she seems she was a lovely girl, and she is exactly same age with me. I regret I never saw her post. I will try to find. My three best friends also send condolence, their English not good enough to write on this site, because we live in Japan. One of them is Korean like me, others are Japanese. We all cried very much when I translate your post for them.

I am so happy to hear that Christa found little bit happiness on this site. You are right, this site is a full of nice nice people, there are no bad people I think. We talk about things which people don't like to talk in public even they are very close in our life. I don't know well autism, this is good chance for us to learn.

Thank you for writing to us. My friend Maho (she is Korean) says that in the Heaven, Christa will not have problems with autism, she will be happy only. I don't know what other things I can say. We all send you our best wishes.

Sorry for my bad English. I hope you can understand the things what I write.

from Mina, and also Kazuko, Hisae and Maho.

My family is in town for a visit and today, we went for brunch to a ???? breakfast place. I ate a ton of food and after I was done, I needed a poo. When I got up to go, I noticed a blonde woman coming in from the street. She looked like she was about 30 or so and she was heading straight for the bathroom. She was wearing a black down jacket and turquoise yoga pants. I noticed that she had a big bum and big thighs kinda like what speed skaters have.

Anyway, we both went in at the same time and took the two only cubicles. I locked the door, pulled down my jeans and string and plopped my bum on the seat. Immediately I started to pee with a hissing stream and a silent fart. I peaked under the partition and noticed that the blonde woman had pulled her yoga pants and pink string all the way down to her feet. She was also on her toes, it totally looked like pooping posture to me. Turned out I was right. While I was still peeing, she let out a sigh and then I could hear the sound of poo crackling out of her bum. It went on forever and finally her turd dropped off and she did another sigh. And, ewww there was a big stink coming from her cubicle. I also needed to take care of my number two, so I leaned forward and started to push. It didn't take long and my first turd slid out of my backdoor and plopped into the bowl with a splash. I pushed some more and dropped another poop and this one ended in long, wet fart which was a bit embarrassing. Even worse, my poo was stinking so bad, and by now the bathroom smelt really awful from what both of us were doing. I was waiting for more to come out when the blonde woman dropped some more turds. From the sounds, it seemed like her bowl was totally filled with poo already.

Finally I pushed out one more smaller log and then I felt empty. I quickly pulled off some paper and wiped my front and my bum. Luckily it wasn't too messy and I only needed a few sheets to clean my backdoor. I pulled up my pants, flushed the toilet and left to wash my hands. As I was drying my hands, I could hear the other woman doing some more poos. I quickly left and went back to my table feeling really relieved. I was also happy that nobody came in while the two of us were doing our business, so it wasn't too awkward. Ok, that's all for today.

To just another girl: Thank you, you are nice. I felt so stupid and totally humiliated afterwards and yes he is a real jerk.


To- Maryam

I am so sorry to hear about Christa. I have been a regular reader and poster for awhile now, but until today I have never used my real name. I feel I should now though. Christa was one of my favorite posters on here. Her bravory and candor inspired me daily. I struggle with autism myself. Christa made me feel like I could have a chance at a normal life. I know everyone on here supported her and wanted what was best. I know it must have been shocking to find this in her history, but just now your daughter touched every single one of us.

I also want to say that you're an amazing mom. Your compassion and love for your daughter was very evident in all her stories. Thank you for sharing your wonderful daughter with us. She will be greatly missed.


To Alexandria: Accident Stories

I began posting nearly 6 years ago and shared my "solid accident" experiences - the first being on page 1821. I would love to know your thoughts. I am 35 and have had more accidents than that with diarrhea, loose stools and that type of thing - I think that we all have.

But I have had three solid accidents in my life where I just could not make it to the toilet after holding the BM for too long. I eat a very high-fiber diet that keeps me pretty regular, but also live an OCD-type routinized life that keeps me regular as well.

When I found this site I thought I might could find conversation regarding the feeling of the solid accidents, which were totally unlike the messy ones. I would love to know your thoughts about this! Or anyone's



Sunday, November 08, 2015


Another visit to my favourite mall.

After Kay left for school, I made my way to my favourite mall again, Oh I had mostly good intentions, I even wrote a shopping list. Didn't have my morning poo tho, that one I was saving for the food court toilets.
After a short drive and finally finding a suitable parking spot, I made my way inside and headed for the food court. It was still fairly early the morning coffee crowd were still present. I brought a large cappuccino and sat across from the hall leading to the toilets. The traffic heading down the hall was almost nonexistent. I sat and drunk my coffee feeling my morning poo slowly building, it was at the stage where I could feel it in my bum but it wasn't urgently wanting out, I was quite enjoying the feeling. I drank the dregs in the bottom of the cup, tossed the cup in the trash container and slowly made my way towards the toilet hallway, I noticed two women coming from the other direction both dressed in counter staff uniforms for one of the chain stores. They arrived at the hallway just as I did and I followed them down to the ladies. Two brunettes Rebecca and Janet there name tags read, they looked to be in their 20's, slim and very tall, they both towered over me. Inside everything was fresh smelling and looked clean. Janet took the stall against the far wall Rebecca whet in next to her and I went in the third next to Rebecca. I dropped my panties, sat down and immediately leaned back so I could peek through the gap at the back into the next stall. Rebecca had sat forward on the toilet leaving a gap at the back, she couldn't have been more perfectly positioned for watching. I glanced across her stall at the gap into Janet's and could see Janet was watching Rebecca too, She looked to be smiling and pointed at Rebecca's bum, I watched, Rebecca sighed and farted, then she tensed up and began to push leaning forward further as she did, showing us her bum hole opening and closing as she attempted to start. After 5 attempts the first poo could be seen, a dark brown colour, about a 1/2 inch round pebble, she managed to get it out then pinched it off, it dropped and left a brown mark on her bumhole. Rebecca shifted her position and pushed again this time a larger log started to emerge from her maybe an inch round cylinder of poo. It was coming out of her nicely, every push she did saw it grow a little longer. I wish I could do poos like that instead of these bunny pellets I do. Rebecca's poo got to about 6 inches out and broke off, leaving us with a view of her bumhole in a perfect circle with the stub holding it open. She pushed more and the stub grew into a log about 2inches out it tapered off to a point and dropped. She sat there holding her bumhole open as if she still had the log in her. She did a hissy wee that ran down her bum cheeks and splashed into the toilet. It was a golden yellow colour and it dripped to an end. Rebecca then rolled off some paper and wiped her bumhole 3 times and her cheeks and pussy 5 times. She got up pulled her panties up turned to the toilet, put the lid down and left the stall. She washed her hands and called out to Janet " I will see you back at the desk" She then left the toilets. There was a rattle from Janet's stall and she exited and entered Rebecca's stall, she lifted the lid and looked inside, she then said " are you still looking" I replied yes and she turned around and dropped her panties and sat down. She sat forward and said can you see? I replied "yes" and she started a hissy wee, almost clear like water, it lasted for about 2 min and dribbled to a stop, Janet's came directly from her pussy it looked to be straight from her no spray or splashing. Janet then farted and whispered get ready. Her bumhole started to open almost immediately and it kept opening and opening. Her poo was dark brown and wide it looked to be bigger than a coke can. I was transfixed someone else came in and took the other end stall and did a wee but I hardly even noticed their presence, Janet held her poo in perfect position until the newcomer left. My mind raced how did she do that? How did she stop mid poo and hold it right there? Janets poo was the widest I had ever seen she was enjoying showing it off too. Janet started making little grunting noises I don't know if it was for my benefit or not but each time she did it her poo would move about 1/4 of an inch it got to about a foot long and tapered off to nothing a bit like a carrot. After it dropped she too was able to hold her bumhole open for a while. more questions raced through my mind how do these women do this? My hole closes after each pebble, How in the hell can they poo so wide ? Janet's hole finally closed and she reached for paper and wiped her bum twice. She was so clean. Then her pussy once. She then pulled up her panties and whispered hope you like the show and exited her stall, washed her hands and left. I sat there amazed at what had happened. I quickly pulled up my panties and swapped stalls. I went in their stall and closed the door I looked in the toilet at the two women's poos, I was shaking and I had butterflies. Janet's poo was sharing the hole with Rebecca's there paper was to the front against Janet's log both were so smooth looking, seamless no pebbles what so ever. The size of Janet's poo was amazing I should have asked her what it felt like doing it, Her bum hole was big too I could see inside a little after her poo dropped. I totally forgot about my own poo and ended up leaving the toilet and coming back to do it sometime later but that's another adventure


To Maryam , & my latest loo visit


Maryam - so very sorry to hear about Christa,thoughts with you and your family, & a very informative but sad read, that touched my heart!! And my heart goes out to you,xx.

My latest loo visit - it's 9pm saturday night and my last poo was about 7pm,
We are at bonfire night and i used the rugby club loos that we are at.
We went for a meal then came here after.
it was one of my usual loose desperate ones, After taking my coat off, & pulling down my black trousers and black knickers with maxi pad in as i am currently on, i got myself comfy on the seat and had an initial 8 plops, followed by a very wet fart, & a final 5 plops to finish, all whilst i changed my maxi pad, I stood up and looked at my creation, sludgy mud unformed plops no definition and very light brown in colour mustardy colour. Sat back down and wiped 6 times and flushed, pulling my bits back up and exitting to wash my hands. Sprayed some perfume and left back to hubs and our friends. Hubs greeted me with a lovely butt massage.
More soon - J xx


Response to clogged up

Clogged Up - I read your story and wanted to ask you a few questions. You don't have to answer them if you feel uncomfortable to do so; I'm just very curious about how you manage to do what you do.

- What is the appeal of holding your poop in (in other words, why do you enjoy it so much - does it make you feel good, or is it the sense of being in control over your body, or the excitement of seeing how long you can hold everything in for)?
- Have you been doing this for a long time or did you just start recently?
- You mentioned that you can go up to 6 days to a week without doing anything, but have you ever held for longer than that?
- Have you ever had an accident from holding for so long? In your last post you described how you narrowly missed having one, but have you ever suddenly started to go in your pants and not been able to stop it and it all came out?
- Do you ever feel embarrassed about farting in public? I know that there isn't much you can do about it, since it's completely normal to get wind (and sometimes even to feel a bit bloated) when needing to do a poo, especially if it's a really big one, but does it ever make you feel self-conscious because there is always the possibility that someone could smell it?
- Aside from feeling bloated and/or having cramps as you talked about in your post, have you ever felt sick from holding for so long because your system is getting so backed up?
- Lastly, how do you manage not to block the toilet? After not going for a week I'd imagine that whatever you did would most likely not flush very well. How do you deal with this?

I'm sorry if anything I asked here was too personal or intrusive - as I said, you don't have to answer anything you don't want to.

Happy holding!



the tale of my poos at my mates wedding...

So last month i attended my very good mates wedding.
My hubby & I went with our other friends Jo & Nick.
It was a 2 pm ceremony and in the morning we had to drive up from Essex to Cumbria for the do,
So as you can imagine it was a very long 6 hour odd drive! We left at 6am & I didnt have my morning poo so in the car i was desperate but as we had only been going 15 mins when i felt the urge i decided i'd wait until we stopped at some services, some 2 hours later! Meanwhile we picked up Jo and Nick who live half hour from us, & set off. Hubby mentioned in the car to me with Jo and Nick listening in that he knows i didnt have a poo before we left 'oh dont worry Jem neither did i mate" said Jo.
So arriving at the services Jo and I both went off for our poos while the boys got some snacks for the car,
Entering there were lots of cubicles, i took a cubicle locked the door pulled my grey tracksuit bottoms and black knickers down to discover i had started my period a few days early! N wonder i had a bad ???? ache!! Brilliant!! Thankfully i had a few maxi pads but this meant i had to buy some more afterwards, so anyway i popped a pad in my knickers and git comfy.
perrrrrlop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop... *sigh of relief* perrrrrrlop-plop-plop-plop-plop...*another sigh of relief* plop-plop-plop-plop-plop *one last sigh of relief* wipe 8 times and flush exitting to Jo who was waiting for me told her i had started - annoyingly, & washed my hands out we went to the boys waiting for us, told hubs i had started and i would have to buy some pads from the shop so off i went to the shop and bought a pack of maxi pads and impulse spray.
Back in the car we were off again and it was now 0830 so we got our speed on and were making great time when UH OH we were in a traffic jam! 45 mins of crawling on the motorway, then we saw the accident, & got going again. 3 hours later we were half hour away and i was desperate to change and have another massive poo. Held it in until we arrived at our b&b, and we all went to our rooms.
First thing i did of course was have my poo and change... the loo was nice with a little shower. I left the door open so hubs could hear me who was relaxing on the bed... i sat down having pulled my trackie bottoms off and got comfy...
*wet fart* perrrrlop-plop-plop-plop-plop...*sigh of relief* ...perrrrrlop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop...*sigh of relief* done. Meanwhile i had changed my soaked pad and popped another in but realised i was very heavy that really annoyed me so i popped 2 in my knickers instead.
I looked at my creation and it was just lots of light brown plops on top of each other sunk from the bottom.of the loo overlapping the water just.
I wiped 7 times and flushed. I decided i would have a shower to feel a bit fresher so i did and came out and out my dress on. Short black minidress with natural tights, that covered my bum beautifully when i tried it on but now my maxi pad was visible sticking out of my knickers at the back but i didnt care, with white shoes and white fascinator.
Hubs had his shower and popped his suit on and we were ready to go. Rubbing my big peachy butt and maxi pads giving my butt a slap we were ready to leave. We waited for Jo and Nick and got our taxi to the venue.
Arriving the venue was stunning.
We took our seats and in came the bride, beautiful ceremony and whilst the B & G were having photos i felt the need for another poo.
I held it in for a while - hubby holding my butt and lightly slapping it every so often whilst chatting to friends. I couldnt hold it much longer and off i went for a poo, the ladies was only 2 loos and i had to wait 5 mins then it was my turn.
hitching up my skirt over my butt and oulling my tights and knicks down i changed my 2 soaked pads and put on 3 overlapping this time it was so bad!! :( (so i was basically wearing a nappy)
Meanwhile my plops were falling very loudly in to the water, 8 initially, followed by a further 5, then a final 4. I wiped 9 times and flushed leaving lots of skidmarks and an awful smell. Pulling my bits up, &
washing my hands and returning to hubs who greeted me with a butt slap and started caressing my butt up and down.
Then it was the breakfast and it was during the speeches i needed my next poo, i held it in until they were over and the room was gettin ready for the evening do.
this poo consisted of 9 plops, i wiped 7 times, changed my pads and flushed.
that was my last poo at the venue because i needed my last poo of the day on our way home so hubby joined me in our b&b loo ...
perrrrrlop-plop-plop-plop-plop *sigh of relief* ... perrrrlop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop-plop *massive sigh of relief* i changed for the night and wiped 10 times, flushed and in we hopped to bed. We left the next morning after breakfast.
more soon hope you enjoyed , J xx

I'm back for another story iv been back up for a couple of day so I went about my usual routine iv been drinking monsters, Budweiser but finally I got a stomach pain and I knew I will have to take a dump so I sat down on the the toilet and let a huge fart then the turd started coming out it was big and smelly by the time I was done the toilet was stopped up bad now I feel much better


about Christa

Hello. My name is Maryam. This is going to be a rather strange post, but after finding seeing my daughter's computer history, I felt I should share. Christa is my daughter, and I am so sad to share that she committed suicide in September. I am sure many of you remember her. She was autistic, and strangely enough, I am glad she found this site. I must admit I was "weirded out" a bit (as Christa would have said) at first when I ran across this site. Not to be judgmental, but I really didn't know what to think. Then I read some of my daughter's posts, and some of your responses. I was in tears. So many of you were so kind and supportive towards my daughter, and I felt a deep need to express my thanks and appreciation. Looking at the computer history, it was during the months Christa was on this site that she seemed happier than she had in a long time. She was more communicative with me, and even stood up for herself to her younger sister who I am saddened to say basically went the way of their father in regards to Christa. I was deeply saddened to read that Christa wished she wasn't autistic because maybe then her father would have wanted her. My beautiful daughter spent 24 years struggling daily. Her autism caused her to see the world so differently and for so much of her short life, she remained very locked away. She was painfully shy and found the outside world frightening. I had to gently push her and coax her to try new things for her entire twenty-four years. Christa was nearly seven before she began speaking at all, and, yes, as she shared, almost ten when I was finally able to toilet train her to some degree. In some ways, my daughter was brilliant. Her computer skills were astounding, and I was trying to arrange for her to meet Bill Gates, who apparently has autism as well. I am surprised that she did not even mention her love and talent for the piano, something else that was astonishing as I never enrolled her in lessons. Christa was an articulate and moving writer, but struggled terribly with expressing her needs and feelings verbally.
When it came to life skills, as I am sure many of you realized, Christa experienced severe delays. She didn't learn to drive until she was nearly twenty, she still needed me to remind her to use the toilet and she had a hard time with the stimulation of a workplace environment. All this was hard on my daughter. Her areas of brilliance alongside her extreme struggles baffled people and caused her to be very misunderstood. Very few people showed patience with a sixteen year old who breezed through college level chemistry, could play Tchaikovsky and even managed to maintain a part time job, but still had frequent toileting accidents and needed to wear diapers. I know Christa felt this. She struggled socially but she was intuitive. Christa spent almost as much time as I would allow on her computer. She loved this technological world that she understood and that seemed to understand her. Less than a month before she ended her life, Christa sold her computer to one of her few friends. It was then that she just seemed to shut down completely. My baby slipped away from me completely over that last month. She quit her job, she dropped out of the college classes she loved and she stopped talking. She didn't even try to make it to the bathroom and would stay in a soaked diaper all day if I didn't help her get changed. She stopped trying to live and all she would say was a helpless, "I'm stupid. Everyone knows it." On September 15, 2015, she hung herself with tightly tied sheets from her bedroom window. I'll never forget that morning. She had left behind two letters. One for me, thanking me for her life and for never giving up on her and for believing in her. She told me she was sorry but she could no longer deal with her pain. The other was to her father who had completely shut her out of his life from the time she was five years old. It was one typed sentence that read. "I just wanted you to be proud of me, Dad." I normally am a private person who does not like to share such information, but I was blown away by the kindness, friendship, love and support shown my daughter over the months she frequented this site. Thank you, thank you, thank you. If any of you have questions or would like to share anything with me, I will check back a couple more times. Thank you again for everything. Love and peace. Maryam.

Anna from Austria
To Mina Thanks again for the infos about the loos in Japan. The feature with the medicine to clean the loo seat is an very nice one.

I have never covered to toilet seat with paper, or was it End Stall Em sad, I have never built a nest under me.

But I have encountered such nests very often during my school days. Some of the girls were to lacy to remove the paper from the seat after they were done.

I always found that a bit strange and it was a waste of paper. Some of the toilets at my school very very often low on paper, and the girls using the paper to cover the seats didn't improve the situation either.

One time I even had a BM and as it was urgent I didn't notice that there was no paper in the stall. I noticed it when I was done.

Luckily a good friend of one was with me, gave me some of one of the other stalls.

As I have already mentioned quite often the toilets in Austria have only small gaps on the ground if at all. The gaps are to small to give a full toilet paper roll through, so I had to open to door to receive it from my friend.

If I had to ask a strange person, that would have been very embarrassing. So it was only a little embarrassing to be seen by my friend in such an awkward situation.

Greetings from Austria


Does anyone have stories about having an accident in their pants?

just another girl

Responses and today's story

To Catherine - I think that's very brave of you, taking pictures of yourself on the toilet. I would feel way too awkward doing that as I'm quite self-conscious and somehow taking pictures on the loo would be embarrassing for me. At least you've got the confidence to do it!

To Bianca - I'm very pleased that you feel better. Throwing up is never fun at all, is it? I love your stories; you write really well. Keep it up :)

To Anna - I'm so sorry that you ended up being humiliated by that hockey player. What he said was absolutely uncalled for and actually downright mean. But men can be like that; believe me, I know, so don't feel bad about it.

Now for today's story. Yesterday I started my monthly a few days early (oops) and, as usual, it's playing havoc with my system. I've been to the bathroom three times this morning alone, and I might have to go again soon because my stomach is cramping quite badly. Oh well, I guess it's just part of life - as I like to say, it happens, and it has to, so I've just got to put up with it.

The other day, I was with my boyfriend and we were just spending some time together before our next class started. I asked him, "Did you know that the average person farts 14 to 23 times a day?" He laughed and then said, "Oh? Do you? No, you don't. I'm sure you don't." I then started laughing so hard I nearly fell on the ground. "What?" I said, incredulously. "Of course I do! I don't know how many times per day, but I definitely do!" He looked shocked and said, "That's not possible. How can you?" I looked him in the eye and said, "Believe me. I do. How can I not? If I didn't, I'd probably be dead by now." He just shook his head, and I could see that he didn't believe me. I think that, at 24, he should know better, but maybe one day I'll actually show him to prove my point!

Have a lovely day!

J.A.G :)


My first crap at a college football game

Last weekend my friend Carin invited me to go with her family to a college football game. These were top teams that played in a 80,000 person stadium. Her family has season tickets and she's been going to those games since we were back in grade school together. As for me, I've never seen such a large stadium that overflowed with so many people. The previous day, Friday, I had had a momentary feeling that I could crap during science class, but since it was the last hour of the day, I decided to wait until I got home. That probably wasn't a good decision because I didn't have to go then and then that night our high school played. After a couple of large sodas, I got the feeling in my bowels again, but didn't act on it because all most all the toilets in the stadium bathrooms have no doors. The toilets are cold when its 50 degrees out and on top of that, I don't like sitting in someone else's pee. That's a situation that's almost always guaranteed in such places because so many of the young boys deliberately hose-off the seats with their pee. So you can see why I don't want to place my butt on such seats?

Carin knows I don't have much confidence in using toilets away from home. I've written about that before. Sometimes I hope my "problem" is getting better, but at other times I'm not so sure. So during a lull in the game with an injured player, I told Carin I was heading down to the bathroom. As I climbed over her to get to the aisle, she whispered "Don't fall in ..." She's always teased me and I often get her back pretty good, too. I didn't feel there were too many people in the hallways (kind of like at my school) but as soon as I walked around a wall and entered the mens' room I saw something unlike I had ever seen before. There was a wall dividing the room right down the middle. It was well lit and its length seemed almost half the size of a football field. To my right their was a huge urinal that was trough-like, such as you would see on a farm for cattle. Right across from it, there were 30 or 40 sinks. I stepped to my left and on the other side of the wall there were about 30-some toilet cubicles, several without doors, and across from them 30 or 40 more sinks.

It seemed that each of the doored cubicles had legs and boxers at floor level. With the exception of one, where a guy about my age was using, I saw at least three doorless cubicles open. I knew I wasn't as shameless to use one of them. So I waited. While I was waiting, Carin texted me and teased me about taking too long. She replied something about her gender going through that every day. Finally, a door opened and a guy with an engineer's uniform with suspenders came out. I started by rolling off toilet paper that I placed over the both sides of the seat. Then I pulled off a smaller piece for over the front of the bowl. Once I seated myself and my junk settled upon it, I felt a little safer about it. I checked my phone and found that Carin was asking how it was going. She gave me the usual guilt trip about using the next guys' toilet paper to seat myself on, but while texting I could feel my activity starting. It came out ever so slowly and with only a little push on my part. It was about 1.5 inches wide and 9 inches long. I remembered I sighed with relief to finally have dropped it and texted Carin. With my other hand I pushed my junk off the paper and aimed it into the bowl. My pee lasted about 10 seconds. Then I stood and wiped. It only took two rounds and as I pulled my clothing back up, I noticed I had some of the toilet paper sticking to me. I took care of that and quickly washed my hands. Luckily I exited just before the halftime crowd started to come in.

When I got back to our section, Carin showed me her phone with 22:17 flashing. That's how long it took me. Her teasing and timing of me didn't surprise me. She went down for a pee late in 3rd quarter. She was gone just over 5 minutes.

Brandon T

comments & stuff

To: Catherine great story it sounds like you had a really great poop and if that is a unisex bathroom and I was at that bookstore im sure I wouldve enjoyed your surprise you left in the toilet lol and as always
I look forward to your next post thanks.

Well thats all for now.

Sincerely Brandon T

PS. I love this site

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